Nellie

Michael · Nellie · Narrator:Michael and Nellie bond over an elaborate, boring locker story that goes nowhere — the narrator cuts away to check on other characters.

Michael · Nellie · Narrator:How did you get into this line of work? / Well, I was buried in loan debt from business school, so I started whoring myself out. / Not that there weren't clues.

Nellie:Oh. I heard there were a couple of girls like me consulting over at Enron.

Michael · Nellie:She's absolutely amazing at that stuff, right? / You do do finances and stuff, right? / I do all sorts of scenes.

Nellie:We're gonna have some ground rules first, okay? No (bleep)(bleep)(bleep) or (bleep). And no (bleep) unless you're wearing a (bleep) or you (bleep)(bleep) me. If this winds up on the Web, I will (bleep) you in the (bleep).

Nellie · Michael:There's no denying that there's a heat between us. / I'd like to deny that. / I know you feel it, too. / This burning desire. / I-I-I don't feel anything. I feel a burning mutual respect.

Nellie · Michael:I've got an outfit that's going to turn that respect into something fun. / Respect is fun.

Michael · Gob · Nellie · Gob:How do you know her? / Met up with her after a show. / And you did things with her? / He didn't. / I did. / Well, if you consider crying like a girl doing something.

Gob · Nellie · Franklin:I just want my brother to respect me, you know? / I mean, I don't even have a job. / Look, I could use a man's voice on the phone. / And I like your little puppet show. / I ain't so little when I take my pants off, lady.

Lindsay · Tobias · Nellie:Michael. / Oh, my God, my husband! / Oh, my God, my wife! / Are you two here for each other?

Lindsay · Tobias · Nellie:- How dare you?! - How dare you?! / - And with another woman! - And with another man! / Wait, wait. You didn't plan this together?

Nellie:Well, you're still going to have to pay Frank.

Michael · Nellie:What did you do with these guys, exactly? / They mostly just cried.

Nellie:You've got a real morale problem here.

Nellie · Michael:I make 300 grand a year. / Marry me.

Nellie:It's weird on so many levels.