Black Bush

Black Bush · Cabinet Member:Black Bush introduces his cabinet and reasoning: 'If I can be real about it... they tried to kill my father, man. Word. I don't play that shit.'

Black Bush:Black Bush on Saddam's weapons: 'This nigga very possibly has weapons of mass destruction. I can't sleep on that. Not on my watch! That's not how I roll.'

Black Bush:'The nigga bought aluminum tubes! Do I need to tell you what the fuck you can do with an aluminum tube? ALUMINUM!'

Black Bush · CIA Director · Reporter:Black Bush: 'The motherfucker bought some yellow cake, okay, in Africa... I got the head of CIA right here, he'll tell you! Are you sure... ARE YOU SURE... I can't believe you motherfuckers. This is ridiculous.'

Black Bush · CIA Director:Black Bush pulls out an actual sample of yellow cake wrapped in a 'CIA napkin': 'You believe this shit now? Don't drop that shit!'

Black Bush · Reporter:Reporter asks about oil interests; Black Bush: 'What? Huh? OIL? Who said something about oil, BITCH, you cookin'?'

Black Bush:Black Bush storms away from the oil question: 'Come on y'all, get outta here!'

Black Bush:Black Bush to the UN: 'You should sanction me. Sanction me with your army. Oh! Wait a minute! You don't have an army! I guess that means you need to shut the fuck up!'

Black Bush:Black Bush to Kofi Annan: 'You think I'm gonna take orders from an African? You might speak 16 languages, but you're gonna need 'em when you're in Times Square selling fake hats. I know Gucci when I see it, nigga, I'm rich.'

Black Bush:Black Bush lists his 'Coalition of the Willing': England, Japan sending Playstations, Stankonia willing to drop bombs over Baghdad, Rickety Row, Afrika Bambaataa and the Zulu Nation.

Black Bush:'Stankonia said they're willing to drop bombs over Baghdad.' (referencing OutKast's 'Bombs Over Baghdad')

Black Bush:Black Bush: 'I am not disrespecting the U.N. Even though they don't got no army. Go sell some medicine, bitches!'

Black Bush:Black Bush aside to himself: 'Trying to get that oil... oh ho!'

Black Bush:Black Bush on aircraft carrier: 'Did I not say that we would win that shit? We rocked 'em, 'bamas! Nigga, you see me come in on that plane? SHHH...! DA DA DA DA DA DA DA DAH!'

Black Bush · Reporter:Reporter asks about elections in Iraq; Black Bush: 'Damn, I knew I shouldn't have called on this nigga! I should not have called on you because you're always trying to distract motherfuckers with things like the war.'

Black Bush:Black Bush pivots from Iraq questions to gay marriage: 'Gay people are getting married, folks. Yes... Nasty! Imagine that? Two women touching on each other's tittie balls...'

Black Bush:Black Bush on lesbian sex: 'Two women touchin' on each other's tittie balls, wrestlin' them, gently strokin' those nipples until they get just so stiff and erect! Blowin' on 'em.'

Black Bush:Black Bush on gay men: 'Men... barbecue... I like you. I like you too, dog. Let's get married, man. It's crazy! What about your... THAT SHIT IS GROSS!'

Black Bush:Black Bush snaps back: 'MEN... BARBECUE... I LIKE YOU. I LIKE YOU TOO, DOG. LET'S GET MARRIED, MAN. IT'S CRAZY!'

Black Bush · Reporter:Reporter asks about post-Saddam upheaval in Iraq; Black Bush: 'Why are you doing this, man? I thought you was my Black brother.'

Black Bush:Black Bush pivots from Iraq to the Moon: 'Here's what I feel about Iraq. I feel like you guys keep trying to distract people with Iraq when I'm focusing on other things, namely the Moon.'

Black Bush:'Stop worrying about that... I got that shit under control! Let's focus on Space, nigga. The United States of Space. 'Cause I ain't stoppin' at the Moon. M-A-R-S, Mars, BITCHES.'