Character Analysis
Michael
Played by Hiram Kasten
8 jokes across 3 episodes of Seinfeld
2.4
8
7.1
7.2
Absurdist
Michael delivers 8 scored jokes across 3 episodes of Seinfeld, averaging 7.1 on craft and 7.2 on impact for a career WAR of 2.4. Their comedy leans toward absurdist. The highest-scoring line is below.
Funniest Michael Lines
Do you love her? Yes, I do love her. You have a very nice place here. So who do you think she looks like? Lyndon Johnson.
I'm gonna twist his neck so hard his lips will be his eyebrows!
You should say, 'You're so good-looking.'
I'm gonna sew his ass to his face!
I'll pluck your body hairs out with my teeth!
All Jokes — 8 total
Do you love her? Yes, I do love her. You have a very nice place here. So who do you think she looks like? Lyndon Johnson.
It's a stupid 'stuperstition.'
You should say, 'You're so good-looking.'
Is she with your bald friend from the other night?
I'm gonna sew his ass to his face!
I'm gonna twist his neck so hard his lips will be his eyebrows!
I'll pluck your body hairs out with my teeth!
There he is, officer. Yeah.