Every member of The Gang has something to celebrate at Guigino's, Philly's finest eatery, but when Mac and Dennis' private dinner is interrupted by an unexpected sighting of Frank and Charlie, the in-fighting begins. Dee also turns up at a table for one, and over the course of the night, the "one-ups-manship" soars to new heights.
WAR
42.6
Wins Above Replacement
“The Gang Dines Out” ranks #107 of 177 It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 77.4 — Great. The episode packs 43 scored jokes at 1.8 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 6.8 on impact, with Dennis landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Dennis: He doesn't hide under a toupee. He faces his challenges, instead of just retreating to the sewers... nude to forage for rings and coins.
Dennis Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Frank: Those two guys don't give a shit about you, Charlie. You bought a business together; they made you a janitor.
Frank Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hey, his shoelaces are tied together.
Dennis: Your hair looks small.
Mac: I was trying to feel your breast.
Mac Cringe/Discomfort Absurdist ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 43 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Mac: I tell you, I've been looking forward to this for... 29 days!
Mac Observational Character Comedy Mac: I did my hair good, and I wore two colognes.
Mac Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: Maybe we'll get lucky and watch one of these dumb-ass waiters spill spaghetti sauce all over himself. And fall down or something.
Dennis Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Mac: Or the anniversary of us moving in together, which is like an anniver-- it's been a long time. Anniversary is what it is, really.
Mac Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Mac: I was trying to feel your breast.
Mac Cringe/Discomfort Absurdist ★ Rewatch Frank: I'm sure at some point they'll come over to pay tribute.
Frank Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dee: They're calling me 'Scarecrow.' 'Cause I'm all alone in the cornfields, scaring away the other birds.
Dee Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dee: I have a Groupon for this evening that expires tonight.
Dee Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Frank: Can't believe this. They still haven't paid tribute. It's been ten minutes.
Frank Callback Escalation Callback Mac: My eyes, they slant down. I don't have a good peripheral.
Mac Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: I'm already sitting in the wobbliest chair in the entire restaurant.
Dennis Character Comedy Escalation Dennis: I don't want to sit on a pile of matches.
Dennis Character Comedy Escalation Dennis: Here I am, a regular, a full-paying customer, and I'm sat by the kitchen on the wobbliest chair in Philadelphia. You know, forced to eat dinner with this swarm of coupon-waving trash.
Dennis Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Dennis: There's an old, short, fat man here. He's sat with his young sleeping partner. Bring them a glass of the house red from us.
Frank: Living with you has... changed my life. I-I used to be unaware...
Frank Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Frank: One glass of wine for two people, and house red? That wasn't nice. They're just trying to agitate us.
Dee: There are men here, and they're watching me.
Dennis: Is that table having a meal consisting only of loud noise, screams, and hollers?
Dennis Observational Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Dennis: Well, maybe my old pal, uh, Abraham Lincoln begs to differ.
Dennis Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: Maybe this George Washington will make it come here faster.
Dennis Callback Escalation Callback Frank: We'll say, we don't want that. You know? We'll-we'll tell them that, uh, what is it, Chilean wine is out of season, and that their taste in wine in general is very poor.
Frank Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: I'm just gonna pour the wine out.
Frank: Those two guys don't give a shit about you, Charlie. You bought a business together; they made you a janitor.
Frank Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dee: Tie his shoelaces together.
Waiter: You want me to... tie a customer's shoelaces together?
Dee: Oh, no, I-I would lose my job. And I wouldn't be able to work at Gugino's anymore, and my family, and they'd be so disappointed 'cause they're currently so proud of my accomplishments.
Dee: I mean, God, lighten up, guy.
Dee Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dee: Oh, no, I-I would lose my job. And I wouldn't be able to work at Gugino's anymore, and my family, and they'd be so disappointed 'cause they're currently so proud of my accomplishments.
Dee Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Mac: When I wanted to get the karaoke machine for our apartment, you laughed in my face.
Mac Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Dennis: Your hair looks small.
Dennis: You remember that night at Dooley's pool party? On that fine summer eve, when I did that double jackknife twist and blew everybody's tits off?
Dennis Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: And then I went down on Chrissie Orlando on the trampoline later that night?
Dennis Escalation Cringe/Discomfort Frank: Frank Reynolds, Charlie Kelly. We would like to make a toast.
Frank: Those people refuse to drink. Yeah. They don't know how to pay tribute. They hate America! They hate the troops.
Frank: They hate America! They hate the troops. They hate the people who work hardest for them. They turn them into janitors.
Frank Escalation Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Dennis: He doesn't hide under a toupee. He faces his challenges, instead of just retreating to the sewers... nude to forage for rings and coins.
Dennis Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: He doesn't hide under a toupee. He faces his challenges, instead of just retreating to the sewers... nude to forage for rings and coins.
Dennis Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Dennis: And I licked her asshole a little bit. It was pretty good. It was all right. It wasn't great. But it was fine.
Dennis Cringe/Discomfort Escalation ★ Rewatch Dennis: ♪ Did you ever know That you're my hero? 'Cause you are the wind Beneath my wings. ♪
Dennis Escalation Cringe/Discomfort Dennis: I was talking about you.
Mac: That was about me?
Dennis: Yes.
Dennis: He wasn't there when I went down on Chrissy Orlando.
Dennis Mac Misdirection Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Dennis: Those goddamn sons of bitches. They turned up the A/C. Because they knew we were sitting right underneath a vent.
Mac: I'll pinch their dicks with this lobster.
Hey, his shoelaces are tied together.
Dennis: I've wanted to see that all night long.
Dennis Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Frank: Have you been here this entire time?
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