Sharon

Jerry · Sharon:Hi, I'm Jerry. / Something the matter? / No, no. Nothing.

Sharon:It always sounds so high and whiny.

George · Jerry · Sharon:Jerry, did you wash this pear? / Yeah, I washed it. / It looks like it hasn't been washed. / So wash it. / You hear the way he talks to me?

Sharon:You should hear how my boyfriend talks to me.

Sharon · George · Jerry:So how did you two meet? / Oh, actually, we met in a gym locker room. / Yeah. Actually, it was in gym class. I was trying to climb the ropes, and Jerry was spotting me. And I kept slipping and burning my thighs. And then finally I slipped, and I fell on Jerry's head. / We've been close ever since.

Sharon · Jerry · George:Do you guys live together? / Live together? No, I got my own place. / Oh, and do your parents know? / Know what? / My parents? / They don't know what's going on.

Jerry · George · Sharon:The two-line phone maiden call disaster — Jerry unknowingly broadcasts his private conversation about Sharon to Sharon herself.

George · Jerry · Sharon:Jerry! Oh, my God! What are you doing? / What? / You're with a woman! / I know. What are you doing here? / I leave you alone for two seconds, and this is what you do? I trusted you!

Allison · Sharon:Really? / Oh, my God.

Sharon · Jerry:You look familiar. Have we ever met? / I'm not sure. Have we?

Jerry · Sharon · George:Well, right now George and I are writing a pilot for NBC. / Oh, so you also work together. / Yeah.

George · Jerry · Sharon:Jerry, did you wash this pear? / Yeah, I washed it. / It looks like it hasn't been washed. / So wash it. [beat] / You hear the way he talks to me?

Sharon:You should hear how my boyfriend talks to me.

Sharon · Jerry · George:So how did you two meet? / Oh, actually, we met in a gym locker room. / Actually it was in gym class. I was trying to climb the ropes and Jerry was spotting me. And I kept slipping and burning my thighs. And then finally I slipped and I fell on Jerry's head. We've been close ever since.

Sharon · Jerry · George:Do you guys live together? / Live together? / No, I got my own place. / Oh, and do your parents know? / Know what? My parents? They don't know what's going on.

Sharon · Jerry · George:I heard what you said: 'Sharon, are you there?' / You heard me talking on the other line? Are you sure? / Yes, I heard you. / Maybe she was disconnected. / Maybe she wasn't. Maybe she heard the whole conversation.

Jerry · Sharon:Oh, can you ever forgive me? [beat] / I don't know. [long beat] / All right, I forgive you.

Sharon · Jerry:You know, the funny thing is, I was attracted to you immediately. / I was attracted to you too. You remind me of Lois Lane.

George · Jerry · Sharon:Jerry! Oh, my God! What are you doing?! / What? / You're with a woman! / I know. What are you doing here? / I leave you alone for two seconds and this is what you do?! I trusted you!

George · Jerry · Sharon:All right. Tell her. Go ahead. / Tell her what? / You know, about us. / Are you crazy? / Tell her, Jerry. Tell her. / I'm telling her nothing. Do you know what you're saying? / This... This is too weird.

Allison · Sharon:Really? / Oh, my God.