Fundraiser

Smokey's dead. Smokey the Bear? Smokey Robinson, Pam. He died like an hour ago.

Did you like that Tracks of My Tears is maybe the last true love song ever written?

Well, I second that emotion.

Tracks of My Tears and what else? What are some more? What's one more?

I'm sorry that I'm not a fan of Jason Mraz or the Beatles.

You don't like the Beatles?

It says here the Smokey Robinson dead thing is a hoax. It's on CNN as of two minute ago.

$250 is nothing to the world's biggest Smokey Robinson fan.

How can they make the Smoke Man play with someone like that?

Don't call me a clown, Pam. You're better than that.

I feel like I'm being strangled, like I'm at some erotic asphyxiation sex club over on I-84. The Red Room, say, or Dominick's.

Could be a knife, could be a gun. Could be a series of guns, all lined up to shoot parallel.

Everybody told me if I moved to America I'd be murdered.

It's going to be super weird.

The warehouse isn't downstairs. Is it? Who knew, right?

Tonight could be the night that Darryl and I go from casual work friends to actual good friends. The only thing standing in our way is the contempt he seems to feel for me.

Did anyone order a blast from the past with a side order of sexy?

Because I want to shake your body.

Where do I look? It's been so long since I did one of these things.

No one's raping this guy.

So, Dwight doesn't understand silent auctions. I guess he's the stupid guy in the office. Because up until now we didn't have one.

The hero lives in this dystopian future and he flies around in a spaceship that's shaped like a treble clef.

This guy's having a breakdown.

I'm more likely to pick up at night, say, after 9:00.

This confirms three things. I'm right about the Senator, I still got it, and poor Angela.

Although he's humanized at the end because he weeps uncontrollably and pees in his pants.

We're flying so high we're cracking the sky Going to fly out of this dome My girlfriend and I

Hey, jabroni, show some class.

You're being a Thomas Oregon.

And a high five. Let's do that again.

He wanted to rock more than just my vote.

Life is Downton Abbey.

Like candy from a baby.

Then suddenly out of nowhere the US Military bought the patent from me for $20 million.

What's another food that we like? Tacos.

I've never eaten a taco. I'm not entirely sure what they are. As long as they're not slimy, and please, God, don't let them have eyes.

A gay man wouldn't leave the store wearing those shoes.

Hey, you bought me these shoes.

You know what I said? Yes. Not a joke. That that was not even a joke.

I will take all of those dogs.

Hello, everyone. I'm Andy Bernard and I am going to take that bitch home.

That is a female dog reference. This bitch understands loyalty. Sassy human reference.

You can administer it orally, but he's going to puke it up. So other end's best.

Kenny's a therapy dog. He apparently thinks you're in some kind of emotional crisis.

Stupid dog.

I'd have to be a monster to root for that. A lonely, aging monster.

Nellie trying to eat tacos visual gag

All I had to do was look up the prices, idiots. Suck it!

Your donation is the largest we've ever received at over $34,000.

When did it become about the flower arrangements? And the white wine spritzers? Hmm? And all the dinner rolls?

These tables tarted up like Victorian whores.

Why does this always happen to me?

Yeah, he should be. It's his first day without a muzzle.

This is literally the worst thing that has ever happened to you.

Sometimes I feel like everyone I work with is an idiot. And by sometimes, I mean all times. All the times. Every of the time.

Doesn't really poop. It's perfect. Nothing to pick up.

I have to prop her eyes open so she can see it.

She smells horrible. It's unbelievable. But I don't want to put her in the bath. I'm afraid that she'll drown.

Man, that stinks.