When news spreads of Bryan Cranston and Aaron Paul’s visit to Philadelphia to promote their Dos Hermanos mezcal brand, the Guys decide to pitch them their own liquor. The Gang takes to the skies to get a taste of the glamorous high life.
WAR
45.6
Wins Above Replacement
“Celebrity Booze: The Ultimate Cash Grab” ranks #133 of 177 It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 75.0 — Great. The episode packs 53 scored jokes at 1.6 per minute, averaging 6.8 on craft and 6.9 on impact, with Charlie landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Bryan Cranston: Bryan's extended dramatic monologue about being controlled and deceived
Bryan Cranston: Boom. And that, my friends, is acting.
Mac: What?
Dennis: Wow! That was... That-that was all fake?
Charlie: On my next hurl, you know, do you... Could you see if you see any loose change in there?
Charlie Cringe/Discomfort Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Charlie: Guys, why is it going off on my stomach?
Mac: Because you have a belly full of nickels.
Charlie Mac Physical/Slapstick Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Aaron Paul: This clown lost all of his money playing slots at Pechanga.
Bryan Cranston: Yeah. It... I-I...
Aaron Paul: No, you have a problem.
All Jokes — 53 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Dennis: Any idiot could take a bottle of booze, slap a celebrity's face on it and make a fortune. I mean, we could do it if we wanted.
Dennis Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dennis: Premium.
Mac: I was gonna say that, dude.
Charlie: Premium.
Mac: I was gonna say premium.
Dennis: Goldschläger.
Mac: Goldschläger.
Charlie: Yeah. Goldschläger.
Charlie: I can get a bunch of nickels and I could smash them up and put them into a 'schläger. We call it Nickelschläger, and we pitch it as the working man's spirit.
Charlie Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dennis: Well, that sounds disgusting, and, uh, potentially dangerous as well.
Charlie: Yeah, I'm-a try it, though.
Dennis: Jägermeister.
Mac: Yes.
Charlie: Jägermeister.
Mac: Yeah, yeah.
Dennis: Jägermeister.
Charlie: Jägermeister, yeah.
Dennis: Those drinks that make people feel premium, you know? So I say we do a blend of all the most premium drinks. We put them all together, and we make one drink called Paddy's SchlägerSchnappsterMeister.
Dennis Absurdist Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch I want money, lots and lots
Frank Character Comedy Visual Gag Frank: I'm in the sky.
Mac: In the sky?
Charlie: What?
Frank: That's right, dicknips.
Frank: I once had Greg Louganis as the face of my apricot brand in the '80s. But when he cracked his noggin at the Olympics, the business took a nosedive with him.
Frank Dark/Subversive Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Dennis: Have you ever hear of a little show called Malcolm in the Middle?
Dennis: Have I? Changed the game. Changed the game, Frank.
Dennis: And Malcolm. He's here, too, although he's all grown up now, so you might not recognize him.
Dennis Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Dee: How are they gonna bring them to Aruba?
Frank: We were never going to Aruba. We're circling Philly.
Frank: I got to put enough miles on the jet to make it look like I went to Aruba and back. It's a tax thing.
Frank Character Comedy Absurdist Charlie: Charlie dressed as a limo driver with a cap he wants to 'tip' to celebrities
Charlie Visual Gag Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Charlie: It's Nickelschläger, man. It's delicious. I've been drinking it all day.
Charlie Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Charlie: Guys, why is it going off on my stomach?
Mac: Because you have a belly full of nickels.
Charlie Mac Physical/Slapstick Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Charlie: I'll make myself throw up and then I'll get... Should I throw up here or, uh...
Mac: I'm going for a 'Jordan in the '90s' look. I mean, who's more premium than MJ, right?
Mac Visual Gag Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Mac: I'm thinking that I go pitch a fashion line and sort of expand into a lifestyle brand.
Mac Character Comedy Escalation Frank: Bathroom on the plane is busted. You can use the emergency can. You're sitting on it.
Frank Dee Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch We don't shake hands. Sorry. We're not shaking hands. We don't know these people.
Dennis: I think... We can't kick this off without a firm handshake.
Bryan Cranston: I really don't mind shaking his hand.
Aaron Paul: How many times do we have to go through this?
Bryan Cranston: Wow, look at that suit. I love that.
Mac: I'm not supposed to talk.
Dennis: It was... Malcolm. He was throwing me a weird vibe. Yeah. He's very aggressive. He's super aggressive.
Dennis Mac Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Mac: Malcolm's not in the middle. He's on top.
Mac Wordplay/Pun Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Charlie: I've been throwing up for a little bit. I actually kind of can't stop. I think I'm having a reaction to the metals.
Charlie Callback Cringe/Discomfort Callback Charlie: On my next hurl, you know, do you... Could you see if you see any loose change in there?
Charlie Cringe/Discomfort Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Charlie vomiting on someone's car and then volunteering to watch it
Charlie Physical/Slapstick Escalation Stranger: Hey, man, are you the Dos Hombres driver? Who? You know, the Malcolm in the Middle guys.
Charlie: Yes, I am.
Dennis: You always were good against the rush.
Mac: Now, that is true. You are good against the ru...
Dennis: Now, you're not gonna get away from us, though. We gotcha.
Mac: Imagine this lifestyle: you're on a Caribbean island in an ill-fitting suit.
Mac Callback Absurdist ★ Rewatch Callback Dennis: Gritty? Wait... What the hell is this? I thought you said Jalen Hurts came in here.
Dennis: How do you confuse a young Black man with a giant orange monster?
Dennis Observational Cringe/Discomfort Mac: Okay, Gritty, picture yourself on a Caribbean island.
Charlie: I did vomit in here earlier.
Aaron Paul: Oh, oh, great. Thank you for that. Wow.
Charlie: We can go by whatever code name you feel most comfortable with, sir.
Charlie Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Charlie: I haven't driven a car in a long, long time.
Charlie Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Aaron Paul: My name is not Mr. Malcolm, it's Aaron.
Charlie: Okay, I got you. Yeah, yeah. We can go by whatever code name you feel most comfortable with, sir.
Bryan Cranston: When I first stepped onto the boards in the Great White Way of Broadway...
Aaron Paul: Oh, and here we go again about Broadway.
Aaron Paul: This clown lost all of his money playing slots at Pechanga.
Bryan Cranston: Yeah. It... I-I...
Aaron Paul: No, you have a problem.
He was a week away from sucking off tourists, okay? To pay his rent, and you know that.
Frank: That can is from a shellfish company I started with Tony Danza back in the '80s. Tony's Oysters in a Can-za?
Frank Dee Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Aaron Paul: Why don't you just shut your eyes and go to sleep? And then I will let you know when you can wake up. Okay? Shh.
Bryan Cranston: Okay.
Bryan Cranston: Oh, but sleep's for pussies.
Frank: This plane, this pretty little bird can be yours for a mere price of $35 mil.
Frank Character Comedy Misdirection Dennis: We're here to sell you a, uh... Nickelschläger! No, goddamn it! None of that.
Dennis: We're gonna start all over, and we're gonna do it with a firm handshake.
Bryan Cranston: Oh. I'm not supposed to.
Mac: I think you're in an abusive relationship.
Aaron Paul: Put your hand down, Bryan. Put it down, you silly little bitch.
Bryan Cranston: Bryan's extended dramatic monologue about being controlled and deceived
Bryan Cranston: Boom. And that, my friends, is acting.
Mac: What?
Dennis: Wow! That was... That-that was all fake?
Dennis: You should consider doing a drama, Mr. Middle. You really should consider doing drama.
Dennis Callback Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Callback Dennis: Hey, so listen, do you guys want to invest?
Bryan Cranston: Boss?
Aaron Paul: Fuck no.
Bryan Cranston: Fuck no!
Aaron Paul: No.
Bryan Cranston: Fuck no!
Aaron Paul: You people are insane. Get me off this plane.
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