Character Analysis
Detective
Played by Nicholas Mele
8 jokes across 3 episodes of Seinfeld
1.6
8
6.8
6.6
Escalation
Detective delivers 8 scored jokes across 3 episodes of Seinfeld, averaging 6.8 on craft and 6.6 on impact for a career WAR of 1.6. Their comedy leans toward escalation. The highest-scoring line is below.
Funniest Detective Lines
Yeah, right. Maybe it was one of your other personalities. What? The wise guy, the little kid, the bellhop, the ballplayer? Maybe the door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesman, but not you.
Don't you ever swear to my God, Kramer. My God protects the innocent and punishes evil scum like you.
The mechanic forms an emotional attachment... thinks he's gonna lose the car. He panics and does something rash.
'What kind of expression is that?' / 'I don't know, sir. Police lingo.'
Maybe the pervert in the park had a present in his pants, huh?
All Jokes — 8 total
'What kind of expression is that?' / 'I don't know, sir. Police lingo.'
Don't you ever swear to my God, Kramer. My God protects the innocent and punishes evil scum like you.
Now, you might beat the gas chamber, Kramer. But as long as I've got a breath you will never see the light of day again.
Yeah, right. Maybe it was one of your other personalities. What? The wise guy, the little kid, the bellhop, the ballplayer? Maybe the door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesman, but not you.
You saw a life, brimming brightly with optimism and verve, and you just had to snuff it out.
Maybe the pervert in the park had a present in his pants, huh?
You're a weed. Society's filled with them. You're choking the life out of all the pretty flowers.
The mechanic forms an emotional attachment... thinks he's gonna lose the car. He panics and does something rash.