Grief Counseling

Michael offering to get Ryan a pencil from the warehouse when pencils are clearly available in the office

Someone immediately asking Michael to get a pen from the warehouse after seeing the pencil routine

Pam asking for coffee from the warehouse when there's coffee in the kitchen, but claiming warehouse coffee is better

I am like Bette Midler in For the Boys. Gotta keep the troops entertained.

Michael thinking Jan is calling because she misses him when she's delivering death news

Michael's awkward announcement of Ed's death with inappropriate emphasis on corporate protocol

Because he was my boss.

Michael inviting people to his office to 'cheer me up' after announcing a death

He was almost 70. Circle of life.

Jim's awkward silence and 'Okay' responses to Michael's casual death discussion

Immediate cut to normal business discussion after death talk

Suck up!

My snack food doesn't fall under the umbrella of your authority.

Jim dramatically declaring they're not doing anything until Karen gets her chips

Ed was decapitated.

That is the way to go. Instant death. Very smart.

You know, a human can go on living for several hours after being decapitated. You're thinking of a chicken.

Not even have his own head to comfort him.

Michael's clumsy explanation of decapitation while miming the action

If my head ever comes off, I would like you to put it on ice.

Dwight's elaborate cryogenic resurrection plan after death

We have a day honoring Martin Luther King. But he didn't even work here.

Michael's robot statue proposal with arms that move and eyes that light up

Better make it 2/3. Easier to stop if it turns on us.

I gave him a six-foot extension cord, so he can't chase us.

Never pegged you for a quitter.

The absurd chip search checking copier and fax machine

Did you check your butt?

Creed's graphic description of blood reaching reception and getting on Pam

His cappa is detated from his head.

Michael spitting on Stanley while explaining decapitation

Michael's talking head explaining the five stages of grief with his goal being depression

Michael's overwrought grief description with bucket of boiling tears and frozen sledgehammer

And then a third guy walks in and starts punching me in the grief bone.

Jim rescuing Pam from grief counseling with fake car trouble

I was mainly focused on the cup holders.

Jim's elaborate fake phone call pretending to be Mike from West Side Market

Dwight's twin absorption story delivered matter-of-factly

I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.

Pam's Million Dollar Baby parody story about her boxer aunt

Jim's Lion King story with cousin Mufasa trampled by wildebeests

All of us kind of in the audience of what happened.

Andy's Weekend at Bernie's story passed off as personal experience

Wait a second. That's Weekend at Bernie's.

Toby's bird story and Michael's aggressive interrogation about checking its vital signs

Michael finding the bird and declaring it's not dead while holding it to his head

You can't get diseases from a bird!

Michael announcing a funeral service for the bird in the parking lot

Jim calling a Montreal supermarket in French looking for Herr's chips

Michael comforting the bird like it's grieving for Ed

Angela's horror at Michael trying to fit the bird in a tiny box

Dwight's farm background explanation and grandfather buried in oil drum

You never can tell what your day here is gonna turn into.

Jim's elaborate explanation of finding chips through manufacturer chain

Pam's elaborate handmade bird coffin

Kevin's story about being told his fish went to hospital in the toilet

Michael's bird eulogy suggesting it might be the same bird that pooped on Oscar

Michael's theory that the bird wanted to come inside to spread cheer with a song

It's not a songbird. Shh.

There is such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown.