Character Analysis
Cab Driver
Played by Torsten Voges
13 jokes across 3 episodes of Seinfeld
1.4
13
6.5
6.3
Character Comedy
Cab Driver delivers 13 scored jokes across 3 episodes of Seinfeld, averaging 6.5 on craft and 6.3 on impact for a career WAR of 1.4. Their comedy leans toward character comedy. The highest-scoring line is below.
Funniest Cab Driver Lines
Cab Driver:Am I fearing AIDS? Oh, yeah, sure. Who isn't? But, you know, you gotta live your life.
Cab Driver:And Mr. Tom Hanks... May I say he, too, would be disgusted by your behavior.
Elaine · Cab Driver:86th and Broadway, please. / I'm sorry, lady, there's a cab shortage. The transit police are making everyone share.
Dispatcher · Elaine · Cab Driver:749 Bleeker. The party's Hanks. Tom Hanks. / Tom Hanks? After me, you're picking up Tom Hanks? I love him.
Cab Driver:I think you made that whole thing up. Yeah, yeah. I know your type. You're too good to make conversation with someone like me. Oh, God forbid you could discuss the jumbles.
All Jokes — 15 total
Jerry · Cab Driver:Jerry gets in the cab, finally headed away from the theater disaster
Jerry · Cab Driver:Jerry's cab driver immediately asks for a cigarette upon picking him up.
Cab Driver · Passenger:I have to stop for gasoline. / Gasoline? Can't you get it after you drop me off? / No. Impossible. It is on empty. See.
Jerry · Cab Driver:The royal cab driver stops for cigarettes across the street, delaying Jerry further. 'I don't have time. I'm gonna miss my spot.' / 'No, no. We go very soon.'
Cab Passenger · Cab Driver:Cab passenger (revealed to be royalty/authority figure) demands the cab driver stop for gasoline — the driver says it's on empty. Passenger: "Yeah, yeah. Okay." — all delivered as if this is an absurd imposition.
Jerry · Cab Driver:Cab driver insists on stopping for gas. Jerry: 'Can't you get it after you drop me off?' Driver: 'No. Impossible. It is on empty. See.' Jerry: 'Yeah, yeah. Okay.'
Jerry · Cab Driver:The cab driver stops for cigarettes AFTER stopping for gas, making Jerry even later.
Cab Driver:The jumble. Hey, do you make a book of jumbles?
Cab Driver:Am I fearing AIDS? Oh, yeah, sure. Who isn't? But, you know, you gotta live your life.
Dispatcher · Elaine · Cab Driver:749 Bleeker. The party's Hanks. Tom Hanks. / Tom Hanks? After me, you're picking up Tom Hanks? I love him.
Cab Driver:I think you made that whole thing up. Yeah, yeah. I know your type. You're too good to make conversation with someone like me. Oh, God forbid you could discuss the jumbles.
Cab Driver:And Mr. Tom Hanks... May I say he, too, would be disgusted by your behavior.
Cab Driver:I want you creeps out of my cab. / Get out of my cab! / You should go to prison, eat prison food the rest of your life. / Get out. Get out, each of you. Each and every one of you, get out of my cab!
Elaine · Cab Driver:86th and Broadway, please. / I'm sorry, lady, there's a cab shortage. The transit police are making everyone share.
Elaine · Cab Driver:Oh, yeah, sure. Now I'm gonna be stuck here. But you knew the way to go. You went to college. Hey, I went to Tufts. It was my safety school. So don't talk to me about hardship.