Paul L'astnamé

Paul:It's, uh, 6:00.

Paul · Jenna · Liz:Through a mutual fund. Friend, jenna. Oh, of course. Through a friend fund.

Paul · Jenna:Oh, I work for a bank. -...Rupt circus. He works for a bankrupt circus.

Paul:I'm just feeling the weight Of jenna's jewelry on my finger pads.

Paul:I'd never tuck my penis again if she asked me.

Jack · Paul:Like at a haunted house sex party. Exactly.

Paul · Jenna:Jenna and I are mirroring until we achieve touchless orgasm. / And... finished.

Paul:During Nude Hour, I got custard all over my penis.

Paul:I mean, come on, why can't we just paint each other's toenails, watch vintage pornography, and then go to bed in our swing like a normal couple?

Paul:I'm saying adopting a dog so it can watch us make love and then returning it, claiming that it bit our imaginary child, is everything that I need.

Paul:I'll trust you to fairly divide up our panties.

Paul:I don't think about kissing her or laughing with her or photographing her with just salamanders covering her nipples.

Restaurant Manager · Paul:You can't be on the floor without your roller skates, Rick. I'm not Rick.

Paul · Jenna:You dress as Natalie Portman from the movie Black Swan, and I dress as former Pittsburgh Steelers Wide Receiver and Pennsylvania Gubernatorial Nominee Lynn Swann. We're two black swans.

Paul:Is this just to talk, or will you be activating my electric underwear?

Paul:I mean, what if we had a child that was prettier than us? We'd have to leave it in a desert.

Paul:I want to hogtie you and hide you in the luggage compartment of a Greyhound bus with just a bowl of dirty water.

Paul:Is this just to talk, or will you be activating my electric underwear?

Paul:I want to hog-tie you and hide you in the luggage compartment of a Greyhound bus with just a bowl of dirty water.

Paul:I want to hog-tie you and hide you in the luggage compartment of a Greyhound bus with just a bowl of dirty water

Paul:I got you an early anniversary present. It's a new leash for when I walk you through the park like a dog.

Paul:I'll cancel the sitter for tonight, tell him he won't need to come sit on us after all

Paul:I am in the restaurant business, and I really love... golf playing

Paul:Oh. Well, I don't have one myself, but I do like a girl with a limp

Paul:You wanted us to be normal? Well, this is our normal, and this is what we think of your morality clause.

Paul:Give Mommy some beard. Oh, you've got some crumbs in here. Oh, eat it.

Paul:There you are! Bad dog! You'll go in the crate tonight.

Paul:Like all the Thai STDs my penis is about to give you.

Paul:The sex monkey I bought in Jakarta.

Paul:Yeah, easy for the person who never does the dishes.

Jenna · Paul:How many times have you climaxed? Zero. Me too.

Paul:You know what, you and Jenna should come visit me and my wife in Montclair.

Jenna · Paul:Sexual walkabout.

Paul:Liza Minnelli's baby tooth surrounded by rubies that passed through a terrified Michael Kors.

Paul:Rick Santorum is right Jenna. Marriage is a sacred union between a man and a woman.

Paul:I may have a dress and a wig and a gynecologist, but I am the man.

Paul:'Old' being an acronym for oxylaprodexatrin, a hallucinogenic plant extract that makes sex terrifying.

Paul:I guess I ate all that asparagus for nothing.

Paul:It's all right! The lack of oxygen is making me orgasm!

Paul:I am so honored to be taking your first and last name.