A girl from Charlie's past reveals they have a child together. Mac sees the benefits in being a pro-life advocate, while Dennis uses an abortion rally to meet women.
WAR
28.1
Wins Above Replacement
“Charlie Wants an Abortion” ranks #139 of 177 It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 74.1 — Great. The episode packs 34 scored jokes at 1.2 per minute, averaging 6.7 on craft and 6.9 on impact, with Charlie landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Charlie · Dee: I mean, I wish I could go back in time and do the right thing, you know? - Like be there for him? - No. Get her an abortion.
Mac: You gotta get an abortion.
Mac Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Megan: That's the list of doctors I'm gonna kill. There's two already crossed out.
Megan Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Jimmy · Charlie: Why? Why?
Prostitute · Dennis: I'll blow you for $10. You know what? Let me consult some of this free literature they got here regarding that proposition.
All Jokes — 34 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Charlie · Dennis: Come to Philly for the crack - It has a picture of the Liberty Bell on it
Charlie: Well, excuse me if all my T-shirts don't have a little guy playing polo on the lapel
Charlie Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Mac · Dennis: They're tribal - Oh, they're trib... I'm sorry. What tribe are you from? What? Is it, like, an Indian tribe or...
Mac Dennis Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Mac · Dennis: Are you gonna turn into the mad munchkin? Do you represent the Lollipop Guild, Charlie?
Stacy: It's about our son!
Stacy Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort Dennis: Nobody wants to hear that
Dennis Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Charlie · Dee: I mean, I wish I could go back in time and do the right thing, you know? - Like be there for him? - No. Get her an abortion.
Dee: So you're not allowed to use birth control, but abortions are no problem?
Dee Observational Irony/Sarcasm Mac: You remember Genesis, Book Two, Verse Three? And he breathed into the nostrils of Adam on the first day. And it was good.
Mac Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: Right in his nostrils, huh? Sounds really uncomfortable.
Dennis Deadpan/Understatement Observational Mac: I remember Stacy Corvelli. She was a slut.
Mac Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Dennis · Mac: Uh, Mac, what's God's stance on blood tests? Hmm. I don't know. I'd have to check.
Tommy: Which one of you fags is supposed to be my dad?
Tommy Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Tommy: Are you serious? This is the guy?
Tommy Character Comedy Reaction Beat Prostitute · Dennis: I'll blow you for $10. You know what? Let me consult some of this free literature they got here regarding that proposition.
Tommy · Charlie: I wanna go to the mall! He's biting my hand! He's biting my hand!
Mac: I don't really wanna join your little freak show. Just looking for some information.
Mac Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Mac: I hate dead baby fetuses, you know? I hate them because they're dead, and they shouldn't be. They should be alive, and they should be loved.
Mac Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Dee · Charlie: Charlie, what in the hell are you gonna do if this kid's yours? Oh, I don't know. I'll probably, uh, kill myself.
Dee: That is such a coincidence. That's exactly what we're here doing.
Dee Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Dee Cringe/Discomfort Awkward Silence Megan: That's the list of doctors I'm gonna kill. There's two already crossed out.
Megan Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Stacy: I can't do this! Tommy's not your son. RememberJimmy Doyle from high school? That son of a bitch is Tommy's real father.
Stacy Setup/Punchline Misdirection ★ Rewatch Charlie: God! All right. So can I still take him out on Saturday?
Charlie Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Dennis: I don't really have any convictions.
Dennis Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Tommy: I will smash your face into a... into a jelly!
Tommy Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Pro-choice woman: Get lost, breeder.
Pro-choice woman: Are you hitting on me at an abortion rally?
Tommy: I think they can just smell how disgusting you are.
Tommy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Mac: You gotta get an abortion.
Mac Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Mac: You can't have this kid. I'm way too young, and I have a little bit of an alcohol problem...
Mac Character Comedy Escalation Dennis · Charlie: This kid reeks of booze! Are you drunk? Don't be drunk.
Charlie: Maybe that's why you don't have a dad anymore!
Charlie Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Jimmy · Charlie: Why? Why?
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