World Series of Dice

Lil' Jon · Doctor:Lil' Jon's medical exam where he can only say 'Yeah!', 'What?!', 'Okay!' - responding to pain tests and insurance questions

Lil' Jon · Doctor:Escalating confusion over 'proof of insurance' with rapid-fire 'What?!' exchanges

Lil' Jon · Doctor:Lil' Jon's drug confession: 'Cocaine? Absolutely not. Marijuana? Yeah! Yeah, yeah!'

Lil' Jon · Doctor:Lil' Jon admits to smoking marijuana with enthusiastic 'Yeah!' responses

Dave · Various PSA characters:Dave's anti-weed PSA parody commercial showing extreme paranoia and violence over a cheeseburger

Dave Chappelle:Dave announces he's quit smoking weed but audience laughs skeptically

Dave:Dave: 'I just love the fact that I have a show where we can run over a kid and everyone just busts out laughing. Only this show.'

Paul Mooney · Host:Paul Mooney reviewing 'Gone With The Wind': 'I thought Scarlett was a ho, because she went bed with everybody, uh, but Mammy.'

Paul Mooney:Mooney calls Scarlett O'Hara a ho because 'she went to bed with everybody but Mammy'

Paul Mooney:Mooney's Mammy fantasy: 'the best scene in the movie is when Mammy told the white people, get off my porch, white trash! I stood and I applauded.'

Paul Mooney:Mooney on Hattie McDaniel: 'She came back as Oprah Winfrey to get her money.'

Paul Mooney:Mooney on barbershops: 'You know it's just a front. It really... they really sell drugs out of barbershops.'

Paul Mooney:Mooney suggests barbershops are drug fronts

Paul Mooney:Mooney's movie pitch: 'The Last Nigger On Earth starring Tom Hanks.'

Dave Chappelle:Dave claims ESPN shows 'World Series of Dice' as black gambling

Announcer 1 · Bill:Announcers ask why they're at Marcy Projects - 'To buy weed?' 'Not this time, Bill'

Announcer · Phyuck Yiu:Phyuck Yiu introduction and name pronunciation

Phyuck Yiu:Phyuck Yiu: 'Konichiwa, bitches!'

Leonard Washington:Leonard Washington's introduction: 'Where I'm from? A little town called, none of your goddamned business.'

Ashy Larry:Visual gag of Ashy Larry's extremely ashy skin

Commentator:'That man is drier than Kunta Kinte's ankle.'

Ashy Larry:Ashy Larry: 'I stole this money outta my girl purse. She think I'm out emptying the trash.'

Ashy Larry:Ashy Larry: 'All right, but I'm about to go from Ashy to classy.'

Grits n' Gravy:Grits n' Gravy on spending his winnings: 'I bought my momma a car and I spent the rest on PCP.'

Commentator:Commentator: 'Loves his mother. Loves PCP.'

Leonard Washington:Leonard: 'I got babies to kiss and bitches to catch.'

Grits n' Gravy:Grits elimination line: 'And when I leave, come together like butt cheeks.'

Rodney Quills:Robber: 'I want everybody in here to get butt-ass naked!'

Commentator:Commentator: 'dice games get robbed. It happens all the time. They very rarely come to a reasonable end.'

Leonard Washington:Leonard: 'I'm Leonard Washington, I don't get butt-naked for nobody.'

Commentator:Commentator after Leonard gets shot: 'you noticed he shot him below the waist, so it's not attempted murder. That was very intelligent on Quills part. Quills knows the law.'

Announcer:Announcer notes Quills shot below waist 'so it's not attempted murder. Quills knows the law'

Ashy Larry:Ashy Larry returns asking 'Where the dice? Where the dice?' during the robbery

Rodney Quills · Ashy Larry:Robber to Larry: 'Go upstairs and put on some lotion, right now!'

Commentator:Commentator: 'I saw this robbery coming from a mile away, which is why I put my car keys up my ass.'

Dave:Dave: 'You think I'm this nice in real life? Fuck that, son! It's because I'm on TV. I'm wild! I pull my balls out right now, I don't care.'

Vernon:Vernon's office outburst: 'Get your motherfucking hand out of my face. You heard me, motherfucker... Do you want a little soft shoe? Should I juggle some watermelons for you, boss?'

Vernon:Vernon: 'Allow me reintroduce myself, my name is Homes... I used to beat motherfuckers up just like you, just for walking around my way! Wu-Tang!'

Narrator · Vernon:Vernon's current situation: gas station job making $6.45 an hour, stinking of gasoline

Vernon:Vernon: 'A dollar? What am I gonna get with a dollar, nigga? I got kids, and that's real. Wu-Tang!'