Diane Lewis

Leslie Knope · Diane:Leslie accidentally reveals she's the suspended parks department employee she's complaining about — referring to herself in third person as 'he.'

Leslie · Diane:'I know for a fact that nobody in the parks department reads letters, except for one person, who is amazing, but s-he isn't currently there, because he was suspended. How amazing can he be if he got suspended?' 'Pretty damn amazing, Diane. Now shush.'

Leslie · Diane:Diane repeatedly suggesting letter-writing campaigns — Leslie keeps shooting her down; 'God, Diane, will you stop it with the letter-writing campaigns? No.'

Ron · Diane:Ron Swanson fixing a pothole himself — 'Yes, ma'am. Yes, I do.' when asked if he knows what he's doing.

Ron · Diane · Andy:Ron is given lemonade by Diane and they have a normal, pleasant interaction — a visual contrast to Andy in the background apparently playing with the children.

Ron · Diane:Lemonade? Please and thank you.

Ron · Diane:That's where I got these gloves. / Right?

Ron · Diane:I came here to fix a pothole, not be mocked. / I'm sorry, it's just... your face is ridiculous.

Ron · Diane:I came here to fix a pothole, not be mocked. I'm sorry, it's just... your face is ridiculous.

Ron · Diane:If you're here to complain about the pothole, I guarantee I did it correctly. Actually, I'm here to ask you out for dinner. Really?

Diane · Ron:'Too late. Good-bye.' — Diane walks out after Ron fails to apologize.

Ron · Leslie · Diane:Ron. Ah! Leslie, may I present Diane Lewis? Diane, this is Leslie Knope. / Diane, wow. Ron has told me so much about you, in that he has told me your name is Diane, and you exist.

Leslie · Diane · Leslie:I don't even know what his middle name is. / Oh, it's Ulysses. / I can see why he didn't tell me that.

Diane:I'm not worried about Tammy. I mean, I'm a middle school vice-principal. I deal with hormonal psychopaths all the time.

Diane:She just knows you so well, and I was starting to wonder if I was ever gonna get to that point.

Ron · Diane:Although, if you'd like to visit Europe, I like you so much, I'd be willing to risk it. But not France, right? / God, no.

Leslie · Diane:You're so lucky. [beat] / I'm going to kill you.

Diane · Ron Swanson:My sitter's still out of town, so I really hate to ask you this, but is there any way you could take them again tomorrow? / Of course. I'd be delighted.

Ann Perkins · Diane:First of all, everyone is fine. / No one got hurt, but there was an incident. / Oh, my God. What happened?

Diane · Diane's daughters:Well, who has been having fun with scissors? / Us! / Ann taught us how to be doctors! / Yay!

Ann Perkins · Diane:You're not mad? / No, it's fine. They're kids. Once, Zoe put Ivy in the dryer, so...

Diane · Ron Swanson:This is why I love you. / Oh. / Well, I love you, too.

Diane · Ron Swanson:Diane Tammy Lewis. / Tammy? Your middle name is... / Just kidding. It's Elizabeth.

Diane · Ron:You can't just roam the streets in an RV and be impossible to find. / I'm on a mission to get off the grid. / Well, you don't have to be entirely on the grid, but you have to be on our grid.

Ron · Diane:I suppose you wouldn't consider moving. / I love you, but your solution to every problem is to live inside a mountain. / I love you too.

Diane · Ron:I suppose you wouldn't consider moving. / I've heard the school system in the tunnels beneath Yucca Mountain is adequate.

Diane:I love you, but your solution to every problem is to live inside a mountain.

Ron · Diane · Tammy 2:Tammy. / What could possibly bring you to a children's performance? Preparing a ritual sacrifice of a newborn?