When Bart decides to spend a bit of time with Marge, it's not long before he's buying tea sets and singing duets. Has he turned into a mummy's boy?
WAR
51.2
Wins Above Replacement
“Marges Son Poisoning” ranks #218 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 79.8 — Elite. The episode packs 62 scored jokes at 3.9 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.7 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Mr. Burns · Smithers: Kill them, Smithers. // You could just buy a new car, sir. // Well... whatever's easier.
Homer: Wish you'd never been unified by Victor Emmanuel II. If only you'd stayed a loose confederation of city-states, trading with each other and occasionally warring.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Mr. Burns: It was the first car to outrun a man. A caveman.
Sideshow Bob · Gino: Bart and I used to go fly-fishing together. // Die, Bart! Die, Bart!
Sideshow Bob: Surely, even the most heinous criminal deserves a seventh chance.
All Jokes — 62 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Willie: Enjoy your multicultural hooey.
Willie Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Unknown student: Your most beautiful costume is your self-esteem. // Pause here to discuss tolerance. What is this crap?
Unknown student: This is worse than 'wheelchair-nocchio.'
Bart: Hey, cryptkeeper, I like your Dodge scare-a-van.
Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Mr. Burns: It was the first car to outrun a man. A caveman.
Unknown student: I thought of that 'cause I slept in a cave last night.
Mr. Burns · Smithers: Kill them, Smithers. // You could just buy a new car, sir. // Well... whatever's easier.
Smithers: May I suggest an Oldsmobile?
Mr. Burns: Now, hold perfectly still for 78 minutes.
Smithers: That's the car I think about when I make love to my wife.
Bart · Lisa: That guy in first class is taking a tv out of his armrest. // What's in you? // A bunch of stupid cables.
Brandine: Cletus, you are the most wonderful husband and son I ever had.
Brandine Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: Well, some people in Europe have the impression that America has made some stupid choices in the past, oh, five years.
Homer: That flag is mine! Don't mess with Texas! Shock and awe, losers! Shock and awe!
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Lisa: Why don't you encourage him to get us some health insurance?
Homer: A McDonald's where you can get booze!
Homer Observational Character Comedy Lisa · Homer: But, dad, don't you want to turn around and see the tower? // There's a picture of it on my cup.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Homer · Marge: It says here we should turn left at a fat chick in a tutu being fed by a midget. // That's a dvd of a Fellini movie.
Homer: I get it. The midget represents dwarves.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy Homer: Mozzarella! Parmigiano! Provolone! Pecorino! Gorgonzola! Fontina! Taleggio! Bocconcini!
Homer Physical/Slapstick Escalation Marge · Homer: We got the cheese insurance. // It doesn't cover mortadella. // No!
Homer: Wish you'd never been unified by Victor Emmanuel II. If only you'd stayed a loose confederation of city-states, trading with each other and occasionally warring.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: Why can't you people learn to speak my language? I learned to eat your food.
Homer Character Comedy Observational Italian villager: Kentucky?! In italia, this a-means 'whore'!
Sideshow Bob: Sideshow Bob of all the regioni and all the villaggi in all of Italia, you had to be il mayore of this one!
Lisa: But it better have a beginning, a middle and an end. And you'd better make us root for the protagonist.
Lisa Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bart: Okay, so far I'm rooting for you.
Bart Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Sideshow Bob: It's pronounced 'buon giorno.' Your mouth is getting lazy on the second syllable. Here, let me guide you.
Sideshow Bob: These feet are made for stomping and that's just what they'll do one of these days these feet will make chianti out of you ready, feet? Start stomping.
Lisa · Sideshow Bob: Holy moley! I always thought you were, you know, out loud and proud. // Well, I experimented in college, as one does.
Homer · Sideshow Bob: I never went to college. // Stop the presses.
Gino: Bart Simpson! Bart Simpson! Bart Simpson! I make like my daddy!
Gino Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Sideshow Bob · Gino: Bart and I used to go fly-fishing together. // Die, Bart! Die, Bart!
Francesca: He makes love like a man who just got out of jail.
Francesca Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Sideshow Bob: Surely, even the most heinous criminal deserves a seventh chance.
Homer: Not necessarily in words, but in body language. You know, sneaking around and such.
Marge: You can't be a bad person if you have a family.
Marge Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Lisa: from Jean Valjean to the voice of Buzz Lightyear, Tim Allen.
Lisa Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Lisa · Homer: Dad, don't act like Mussolini. // I thought I was doing Donald Trump.
Sideshow Bob: This sausage shop has been grinding the same family of pigs for 600 years.
Homer: And he kisses you with that mouth.
Homer Cringe/Discomfort Reaction Beat Wiggum: Chief, I tried to warn you. Sideshow bob hasn't lived here for months.
Wiggum Visual Gag Character Comedy Wiggum: Mark Wiggum, fat kid, played a lot of tetris.
Wiggum Character Comedy Absurdist Sideshow Bob: my heartfelt wish that they never return.
Homer · Bart: Marge, don't be so olive garden. // Yeah, this is Italy. Look, the town drunk is two years old.
Lisa: Look, the town drunk is two years old.
Lisa Observational Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Lisa: More like jailed at sing sing.
Lisa Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Sideshow Bob: Drunken children tell the ugliest lies.
Sideshow Bob: But darling, the boy drove me to murder by exonerating a harlequin who I framed for robbery at the Kwik-E-Mart.
Bart: Boy, that Sideshow Bob goes from zero to murder awfully fast.
Bart Observational Character Comedy Callback Bart: At least this time it was Lisa who ruined Bob's life.
Bart Character Comedy Callback Marge: It's called a hangover, sweetie. And it's an unavoidable part of life.
Homer: What am i supposed to use it for... transporting water to distant urban centers?! Lazy romans.
Homer Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Sideshow Bob: Why do I keep trying to kill them?
Francesca: Revenge is a dish best served family-style.
Homer: I feel like I'm the Bourne Identity.
Homer: They have that here, too?
Homer Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Krusty: Vendetta? What's that, an Italian vending machine?
Krusty Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Homer: I am the gayest super villain ever. Beware my scented candles.
Krusty: Yeah, well, it sounds like you're all taking a Napoli.
Krusty Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Krusty: Well, I need someone to help me smuggle antiquities to America. Everyone, break off a piece and hide it on your person.
Krusty Dark/Subversive Escalation Top Episodes — The Simpsons