Bart and Lisa start struggling in their academic and social lives at school and Homer starts monitoring them and forcing them to do better. Meanwhile, Marge discovers a sauna in the basement.
WAR
72.5
Wins Above Replacement
“Father Knows Worst” ranks #61 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 84.9 — Elite. The episode packs 78 scored jokes at 4.7 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.9 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Homer · Marge: A light bulb is either on or it's off. Not if you use a dimmer switch. That's what the dimmer switch companies want you to think.
Homer: Help me, mayonnaise!
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: Whatever happened to 'boo?'
Homer Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Noah's Dad: Well, call me over-involved, but someday, your son will be my son's chauffeur.
Homer: I can't eat tacos? Oh, my God. What day of Mayo is it? Cinco.
Homer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 78 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Carnival Vendor: Hot dogs, not so hot dogs! Cold and droopy!
Carnival Vendor: Fried dough! America's worst legal food!
Homer: Never leaves your body! The Truth in Boardwalking Law has really done a number on this place.
Homer Wordplay/Pun Absurdist ★ Rewatch Carnival Game Operator: Shoot an oversized basketball into an undersized hoop! It's impossible! The prizes have been here for 50 years!
Bart: I could juggle six pins if they let me use a unicycle.
Bart Absurdist Character Comedy Street Performer: Are you insane? You can't throw a little boy into my cascade. Stop tossing kids!
Homer: Finally, I can have fun with something I bought for myself! A new water heater.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Homer: Five more water heaters, and we get a free water heater!
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Homer: It's like a sauna in here. It is a sauna, in here.
Homer Deadpan/Understatement Misdirection Moe: My invitation didn't say nothing about no towels, so, I guess we should all just go Scandinavian.
Moe Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Homer: Maybe I'll keep this to myself for a while.
Homer Reaction Beat Irony/Sarcasm Vendor · Bart · Homer: Chicken kebab! Fire kebab! - Dad, no! - Dad, yes!
Homer: Why... you... little... Burn, Barty, burn!
Homer Callback Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Callback Doctor · Marge: It may put something of a cramp in your lovemaking. No, it won't... if he wants me to do something, he'll write it down.
Homer · Marge: Is it complimentary? Yeah, sure, it's complimentary. It is? Hey, everybody, check out my compliment!
Homer · Doctor: I held up two for 'peely'! I thought that was a 'Y,' for 'Yanky.' I'll make a note in your chart that you aren't always clear.
Homer: Too much cherry! Lemon. That'll stop the cherry.
Homer Character Comedy Escalation Doctor: Well, I do have an idea, but just to be sure, let's run some expensive tests.
Doctor Observational Dark/Subversive Marge: That'll be our Christmas card, this year.
Marge Visual Gag Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Homer: I can't eat tacos? Oh, my God. What day of Mayo is it? Cinco.
Homer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Marge: Try these beets. I boiled all the red out.
Marge Absurdist Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Homer: I still taste overtones of pink!
Homer Absurdist Escalation ★ Rewatch Lisa: It feels like food, but it has no flavor whatsoever! It's mac and cheese from the school cafeteria.
Lisa Setup/Punchline Observational Lunch Lady: chili con cottage cheese, pecan blandies, cream of steam, you guess 'ems...
Old Comedy Writer: Old comedy writers who now have to work at our kitchen. The one rule we had on Charles in Charge, is Charles must always be in charge.
Homer: I'm big and yellow and I'm servin' Jell-O. If you're a fellow and you want some Jell-O, you better bellow 'Hey, big guy, give me some Jell-O.'
Homer Wordplay/Pun Cringe/Discomfort Homer: No Jell-O for you, Bart. It'll keep you up at night.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Old Man · Homer: I used to date your daughter. Buddy, I'm here to eat, not make interesting conversation.
Bart: It's bad enough I have to be here three days a week.
Bart Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Noah's Dad: Hi, Homer Simpson. Mind if I sit near your son? Mine sucks.
Noah's Dad · Noah: Noah, state capitals: alphabetical order, on my clap! Albany! Annapolis! Atlanta! Augusta! Austin! Baton Rouge! Bismarck! Boise! Boston! Capital City! Carson City!
Homer · Noah's Dad: He's terrified of you. That's why I'm here: to make sure he gets good grades.
Homer: Isn't that why we pay school teachers those enormous salaries?
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Observational Noah's Dad: Well, call me over-involved, but someday, your son will be my son's chauffeur.
Homer: Well, I hope your son enjoys being driven around by the president of the United States.
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Noah's Dad: Really? What the future president's doing right now.
Noah's Dad: You don't see many presidents doing that. Maybe L.B.J. at the end.
Noah's Dad · Homer: It's 'helicopter parenting.' I don't have to 'helicopter' Bart. I've got a backup plan called 'Lisa.'
Noah's Dad: Sure, she's smart, but how can she be successful if she's not popular?
Girl at lunch: Well, we're having cold shoulder.
Homer: My God! My son's a loser and my daughter's a loner!
Homer Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Homer: No time. I'll deduce where you were from a list of possibilities in my head.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Marge · Homer: Don't you usually worries about stuff? Do I?
Homer: Help me, mayonnaise!
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: A thousand dollars?! That's what my house is worth!
Homer Character Comedy Observational Homer: Too obvious. Got to be something from Earth.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: I did it! I helped my son! Helicopter Homer away!
Homer Character Comedy Callback Callback Homer: Black Hawk down! Black Hawk down!
Homer Physical/Slapstick Escalation ★ Rewatch Marge: Sweetie, our country was founded by a clique: the Continental Congress. Dolphins swim in cliques.
Marge Absurdist Observational ★ Rewatch Marge: It takes a lot of courage to wear suspenders when you're not in the circus.
Marge Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort Rat: You saying my clothes are clown-like? I feel so insecure. Please be my friend.
Rat Escalation Cringe/Discomfort Marge: There's also envy-tations, hate-hugs, spamming with faint praise
Marge Wordplay/Pun Escalation ★ Rewatch Popular Girl: I didn't mean 'everyone' everyone.
Marge: And that, my dear girl, is called the Toledo Take-back.
Marge Wordplay/Pun Absurdist ★ Rewatch Lisa: I'm a big girl! I'm a big girl!
Lisa Escalation Character Comedy Store Owner: Son, you buy an awful lot of airplane glue, but you never buy any models.
Principal Skinner: It's like saying, 'I don't care. My kid's a loser.'
Other Parents: You've got to be crazy! Prepare to be frustrated! You won't get past the north transept!
Bart: Blabby's gonna build an Abbey. Groovy.
Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Marge: 'Ant poison'? Why do I always read the labels after?
Marge Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy Marge: Everything to make those hundred-dollar phones look like five-dollar toys.
Marge Observational Irony/Sarcasm Lisa: I've never been called 'fierce' before. 'Strident.' 'Hectoring' has been tossed around.
Lisa Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Homer · Bart: A little further back. Do you want me to watch and learn? Naw, that kind of creeps me out.
Homer: That's not Henry the Seventh, it's Henry the Sixth! Stupid, stupid, stupid!
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Homer · Geoffrey Chaucer: Geoffrey Chaucer?! What are you doing here? Well, I'm buried here.
Oscar Wilde: There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
Oscar Wilde: Experience is simply the name we give to our mistakes.
Homer: Whatever happened to 'boo?'
Homer Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer · Bart: Now we could smash the real Westminster Abbey it looks like this. There are no flights to London till 5:00.
Principal Skinner · Someone: He said your show. I watched it once!
Judge: The only entry that repels my eye enough to be constructed by a student is this one.
Judge Irony/Sarcasm Setup/Punchline Homer: In your face, losers! This helicopter is taking off!
Homer Escalation Callback Callback Bart: I didn't make this terrible model. My dad did.
Bart Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Lisa Visual Gag Wordplay/Pun Lisa: These girls are nice on the surface, but it's hard work staying this shallow.
Lisa Observational Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Homer · Marge: A light bulb is either on or it's off. Not if you use a dimmer switch. That's what the dimmer switch companies want you to think.
Homer · Marge: The mattress the dog sleeps on in the cellar? No, I gave that to the homeless shelter. It was stuffed with cash!
Homer: I feel like I've died and gone to Hell.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Top Episodes — The Simpsons
