Larry and Richard Lewis, who both see the same psychotherapist, plot ways of ending their respective relationships with the therapist after Larry sees the man wearing a thong bathing suit.
WAR
47
Wins Above Replacement
“The Thong” ranks #97 of 120 Curb Your Enthusiasm episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 76.1 — Great. The episode packs 61 scored jokes at 2.1 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.6 on impact, with Larry landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Larry · Dr. Weiss: There's no swing. I'm a hammock. A hammock is very placid. A hammock? Yeah, just gently flowing in the breeze, that's me.
Larry: What do you want, you want a kidney? I'll give it to you. What else do you need? I've got a terrific penis. I could donate a penis. I've got good spleen, excellent spleen.
Larry Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry: A hammock is very placid... Yeah, just gently flowing in the breeze, that's me.
Larry Escalation Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: Your day is coming. Don't give up hope, keep hope alive. You must keep hope alive, bald people.
Larry Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: I feel aggravated that I'm missing what other people are getting.
Larry Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 61 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Larry: You know, 'cause they're gray. And if you think about it, it's a good color 'cause white is really too bright... and black is almost like a pair of shoes. And gray is kind of right in the middle.
Larry Observational Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry: I can't serve, I'll have to make dainty little serves... and she'll beat me every time.
Larry Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Larry: I don't really like the outdoors, you know. It's not a good place for bald people out there.
Larry Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: All those disgusting bodies walking around, I have to look at them.
Larry Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Larry · Other patient: Nice to see you. You cured? 100%. You had the big breakthrough? I think I'm ready to terminate.
Larry · Other patient: It's such nonsense, isn't it? What are you gonna do? You can't bother your friends with this stuff. This goes on forever.
Larry · Rob: No one wants to have lunch with me. No, you are the guy who created Seinfeld. Yeah, but I mean... No one's gonna bid any money. It's gonna be embarrassing. To go to a Larry David lunch? 50 cents, you know, it's ridiculous.
Larry: No one's gonna bid any money. It's gonna be embarrassing. To go to a Larry David lunch? 50 cents, you know, it's ridiculous.
Larry Character Comedy Escalation Larry · Rob: You'll be surprised at how much you go for. Surprised, I'm gonna be... I think you're gonna be surprised at how little I go for.
Larry · Cheryl: A radio? Is there a ballgame I can listen to or anything? Then you're defeating the purpose, aren't you?
Larry · Cheryl: Why didn't you wear it? You got yours on? Of course. I thought I'd be uncomfortable. You're going to the beach. I didn't want to drive an hour and a half with a bathing suit on.
Larry: Jews buy, like, 85% of the sun block that's sold in this country, don't you think? Without Jews these sun block people would be out of business.
Larry Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: Without Jews these sun block people would be out of business.
Larry Observational Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: I've never once seen a Gentile ask for, or even put on, sun block.
Larry Observational Escalation Callback Larry: I stare at it for 10 minutes and I go, 'Okay, I get it.'
Larry Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: I feel aggravated that I'm missing what other people are getting.
Larry Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Larry · Cheryl: Holy shit. What? I think I just saw my therapist. You see a guy in a striped bathing suit? Skimpy, skimpy suit, you see that? Yeah, I see him. Yeah, that's my therapist.
Larry · Cheryl: I can't talk to him in that bathing suit. It is pretty small.
Larry: Did you see the back of his bathing suit? How does he walk around like that?
Larry Visual Gag Cringe/Discomfort Larry · Cheryl: I've got to stay like this now, for the rest of the day? I guess that's up to you. Kiss that therapist goodbye.
Larry Visual Gag Cringe/Discomfort Larry · Cheryl: Like Richard Simmons? Richard Simmons has a thong up his ass? Did you ever see him do that shit? No. Holy shit.
Richard Lewis · Larry: Like Richard Simmons? - Richard Simmons has a thong up his ass?
Larry · Richard Lewis: You should be thanking me. Saving you from this hedonist giving you advice. Hedonist, he's a hedonist? He's not a hedonist. What is he?
Richard Lewis: Two, three months? That's just the crib. I was born in Brooklyn, and I felt alienated... and I became an alcoholic.
Richard Lewis: I was born in Brooklyn, and I felt alienated... and I became an alcoholic.
Richard Lewis: What is this, Roots? What you mean, 'auctioned off?'
Larry · Richard Lewis: Somebody paid $4,000 to go have lunch with me. - Do you believe that? - You should be flattered.
Larry · John Tyler: Like the president. President Tyler. Yeah. Should I call you Mr. President?
Larry · John Tyler: If I was named after a president... I would know everything about him. I wasn't named after him, it's just a family name. You never know. I'm related to King David.
Larry: a president and a king... at the same table. Pretty big table.
Larry Deadpan/Understatement Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry: You ever catch your parents having sex? No. Me either. You know they did, but you wonder when.
Larry Awkward Silence Observational ★ Rewatch Larry · John Tyler: You ever see Joe Piscopo's Jersey Guy? 'I'm Jersey guy. I'm from Jersey, I'm the Jersey guy.' Yeah, people from Jersey didn't really find that guy funny.
Larry: Ever play the salt and pepper shakers? What song is this? 'Happy Birthday To You.' Happy birthday, Happy birthday, Mr. President John Tyler, Happy birthday
Larry Physical/Slapstick Absurdist Larry: What do you want, you want a kidney? I'll give it to you. What else do you need? I've got a terrific penis. I could donate a penis. I've got good spleen, excellent spleen.
Larry Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry: I've got good spleen, excellent spleen.
Larry Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry: Mr. Spleen gets rid of dirt and grime And grease in just a minute Mr. Spleen will clean your whole house And everything that's in it, Mr. Spleen
Larry Wordplay/Pun Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry: If you change 'Mr.' to 'Monsieur,' say, 'Monsieur Spleen'... then you'll think that the commercial was... Monsieur Clean, Monsieur Clean
Larry Wordplay/Pun Escalation Callback Larry: Of course, Dick Groat. Named after Dick Groat... who used to play shortstop for the Pittsburgh Pirates. I know, 'cause he was a bald guy. And he didn't feel very well... 'cause he was very excited all the time, is that it?
Larry Misdirection Absurdist ★ Rewatch Larry · John Tyler: You sure it wasn't Dick Groat? Yeah, I'm pretty sure. Dr. Groat might be Dick Groat's father, for all we know.
Larry · John Tyler: So, you don't want me to start, is that it? It's a couple minutes. You don't mind, do you? I just think it's kind of weird.
Larry · John Tyler: I think it's kind of impolite to prevent a person... who is hungry from eating. Yeah, but we're supposed to be having lunch together. Do we have to start at the exact same time? I don't get that.
John Tyler: I don't see why you can't wait two seconds for your cold sandwich. It's not even hot.
Larry: What kind of person says yes to 'Do you mind if I start?' Do you know anybody who would do that?
Larry Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Rob: It's being Groat's active.
Larry: Pretty, pretty, pretty... pretty, pretty good.
Larry Running Gag Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Larry: You know what I am? I'm the terminator. I am the terminator.
Larry: But, if you're gonna remind me of the holocaust... l'm not gonna feel so great.
Larry Dark/Subversive Escalation ★ Rewatch Larry: Agitated? No, what you're seeing as agitation is actually ebullience.
Larry Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: No, what you're seeing as agitation is actually ebullience. You've never seen me ebullient, so you don't even know what it is.
Larry Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry · Dr. Weiss: There's no swing. I'm a hammock. A hammock is very placid. A hammock? Yeah, just gently flowing in the breeze, that's me.
Larry: A hammock is very placid... Yeah, just gently flowing in the breeze, that's me.
Larry Escalation Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Callback Dr. Weiss: So it had nothing to do with the thong?
Dr. Weiss Callback Misdirection ★ Rewatch Callback Larry · Cheryl: So? He's on to us. He knows about the whole thong thing. He knows about the thong thing. He's on to us? He's on to me.
Larry · Richard Lewis: How else am I gonna leave a shrink? How the fuck do I know? I'm miserable and I'm suicidal, I want to leave?
Larry · Richard Lewis: Tell him you're a Scientologist or something. I'm not. Tell him you're into Scientology.
Larry: And I have been assured that after they come up... with a cure for Groat's, they're gonna tackle baldness. I've been assured. So, watch out, bald people. Your day is coming. Don't give up hope, keep hope alive. You must keep hope alive, bald people.
Larry: Your day is coming. Don't give up hope, keep hope alive. You must keep hope alive, bald people.
Larry Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Larry · Rob: This is awful. You can't let her do this. I don't know if we should pull her off. I gotta get her off. Time to stop. No! Come on, stop. No!
Larry · Others: This is awful. You can't let her do this. - I gotta get her off.
Larry · Melanie: Time to stop. - No! - Come on, stop. - No!
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