A Good Opportunity

Murray:Your cds made double platinum in America... No, it's the crazy dogggz, sorry.

Bret:I thought we had sold five.

Murray:They called me to say that you stole a cushion.

Bret:Did you?

Jemaine:Mm-hmm.

Bret:Yes.

Jemaine:No, this is a really nice cushion.

Murray:R Kelly wants to sing on your next song... Yes, that's the crazy dogggz.

Murray:dear Murray, We want to fire you as our manager.

What?

What?

Murray:Now look at you.

Jemaine:We're poor and we've got no gigs.

Murray:We're slightly poorer.

Jemaine:Yeah, bret's only got one shoe.

Murray:I can get you another shoe...

Bret:it's not about the shoe...

Murray:Not a problem. What size are you?

Murray:Item four: Stuff you.

Jemaine:Are you sure that's not for the crazy dogggz?

Jemaine:Why did I get double stuffed?

Murray:They're fake. I had to make them myself... They're pencil sharpeners stuck To a couple of bits of wood

Jemaine:I thought we won 'best new zealand artists.'

Murray:There's no such category, jemaine.

Murray:'Doggy bounce,' number one. 'Doggy dance,' number five. 'In the pound,' number 37.

Bret:What about your 'best management' award? That's fake as well.

Murray:Good luck without me, you turkeys.

Murray:♪ rejected ♪ ♪ thrown away ♪ ♪ affected ♪ ♪ I don't know what to say ♪

Murray:♪ like a cake shop without any cakes ♪ ♪ like a cornflake box without any flakes ♪

Murray:♪ like a little orphan girl... ♪

Murray?

Murray:One moment.

Murray:♪ and rejected. ♪

Murray:One moment.

and rejected.

Glen:Yes, Murray?

Murray:Please, tell him I'm not there. I'm not here either. I'm not... not anywhere.

Murray:They'll never hit the big time. They're too devious. Trust me, though, they're devious. I know.

What would you be doing behind the scenes?

Having dinner?

Going to the movies?

Relaxing?

Murray:Um, higgling.

Bret:Higgling?

Murray:Yeah, do you know what that means?

Jemaine:Is that a word that you just made up?

Murray:It's made-up, yeah

Martin:This could make you so rich you'll be shitting money. Literally if you wanted.

Murray:But we can't sell it tonight 'cause I'm wearing it.

Bret:How'd you get the jacket so realistic?

Murray:Yeah, that's real denim.

Martin:here's two men Who know exactly what women feel like.

Bret:Underscore is your middle name, is it?

♪ some women like men ♪

♪ some are lesbian ♪

♪ femident toothpaste. ♪

Bret:Nah. Weaving is a man's game... I come from a family of weavers.

Jemaine:I thought your dad was a sheep lawyer.

Bret:Yeah, during the day, but at night he weaves a lot.

Jemaine:Women's rights.

Bret:No, that's more of a man's thing, isn't it? ... my father's a women's rights activist. Dad wouldn't allow that.

Dave:They like wrestling in cooking oil on a plane... I took them up on a plane, they were making a salad, Next thing you know, they're just wrestling at 85,000 feet.

Dave:They're probably just doing brazilians. They'll show up. Don't worry.

Bret:It's easier than easy.

Murray:Oh, okay, so you're telling me It was unbelievably easy.

Murray:Monday you're trying to do a TV commercial, They're filming it, it's all about toothpaste, Then Tuesday they're filming you naked.

Murray:This cover version came out 13 years Before the crazy dogggz's original version.

Murray:So I've got... so you're normal...

Bret:No, I'm bad.

Murray:You're bad?

Murray:I've got three...

Murray:That's worth $20,000. It was a gift from Tori Amos.

You should've seen Doug When he heard what happened.

Doug:Hey.

He went berserk.

Doug:Really?

Actually, mel really went more sort of berserk.

Mel:Conversation hog. 'Oink oink oink oink. I've got something to say all the time.' He's always talking.

Mel:Why did you come, Doug, If you didn't want to light a fire?

Dave:Some of the best songs are jingles. ♪ pussymart, pussymart. ♪

Dave:The d in my name stands for 'deal.' ... the word 'Dave' Actually means 'deal' in latino?

Dave:How much would you give me for this?

Bret:A dollar.

Dave:Double it...

Bret:Sold!

Dave:I just made him pay Nearly 10 times what he wanted to pay

Bret:I thought it was an exercise.

Dave:Yeah, you've got to learn the whole lesson.

Martin:This song is 18 minutes long. We're talking about a 30-second commercial here.

Jemaine:We thought it would be more of a concept.

Martin:I know you're from new zealand. What is this, 'lord of the rings'?

Bret:some of them aren't about toothpaste, They're just things in our life.

Martin:The fee is $1,000 each.

Bret:Sorry, now I'll say it. Double it.

Martin:I am doubling it. It was going to be $500 each.

Martin:I am doubling it. It was going to be $500 each.

Jemaine:He already doubled it in his mind.

Murray:That's the glovebox there.

Bret:Ah. Oh.

Murray:I'm persona non regates.

Jemaine:You know what that means?

Jemaine:You're not at yacht race?

Murray:I'm persona non regates.

You know what that means?

No.

You're not at yacht race?

Murray:Unless you move your vehicle every three hours.

Murray:Are they woven? Wow.

Bret:These are man-made.

Bret:♪ you are a woman, you wear women's wear ♪

Jemaine:♪ you have breasts and longish hair, oh yeah ♪

Bret:Is it just a bit of card? ... Just a card, a greenish card? ... Is it like a library card?

Jemaine:No, we're illegal immigrants.

Bret:We've got blue robes on. We're not wearing anything...

Murray:Bad news, guys: Your passports aren't ready.

Bret:Do you have them?

Murray:No, they're in my cupboard.

Jemaine:You just said you had them.

Murray:I've got them in my cupboard.

Murray:This is exactly what happens when you try to manage yourselves. If you had stuck with me, you wouldn't be in this job situation, would you?

Murray:I think we should run for it. Come on, let's go. Go! Run! Run! Quickly! No time for debate!

Murray:I managed to get you a shoe, eh?

Murray:Good managing, eh, guys?

Bret:Murray, it couldn't have possibly gone worse.

Murray:I think there's a guardian angel looking after us. - Somewhere up there, someone's looking down, Making sure everything turns out okay for us.

♪ there are angels ♪ ♪ in the clouds ♪ ♪ doing it ♪

Angels having sex in the clouds song