The Sponge

If you see someone with a hearing aid...you don't think, 'Oh, they must have been listening real good. Yeah, to a lot of important stuff.' No, they're deaf.

It's hard enough living next door.

If I date a taking person...everyone's taking, taking, taking. No one's giving. It's bedlam.

I'd just come from buying a speedboat.

Haven't been in the lab yet.

I think it began with a W, maybe a Q.

He scratches off a 32 and he puts in '31.'

Well, this is the Jerry Seinfeld that only I know.

I'll be cut out of the loop.

I'm gonna do a hard target search of every drug store, general store...health store, grocery store in a 25 block radius

Figure it's something.

I got a 31 waist, mister.

Sixty? Just give me the whole case, I'll be on my way.

Yeah, the oceans are really getting very sudsy.

Do the bums ever complain, 'Soup again?'

What does a poet need an unlisted number for?

You know, you use the: The what? You know, the:

There's really no big surprises here...so make-up sex is all that I have left.

I'm sure you'll have another fight, George.

You're lucky you're walking out of here with a pair of pants on!

If you were in the Mafia, would you tell her every time you killed someone?

You can't have sex with someone you admire.

I just couldn't decide if he was really spongeworthy.

You know what you are? You're a ribbon bully.

It's like Beat the Clock. There's a lot of pressure there.

And if I can speak frankly, I'm actually quite good at it.

She is depraved.

I change the 32 waist on the label...to a 31 on all my jeans.

It's too late.

I guess we're just going to have to teach him to wear the ribbon.

She said I wasn't spongeworthy. Wouldn't waste a Sponge on me.

It's probably so the woman has one last chance to change her mind.

I wish I could help you, but I can't afford two of them.