Character Analysis
Police Officer
11 jokes across 10 episodes of Seinfeld
2.1
11
6.6
6.7
Escalation
Police Officer delivers 11 scored jokes across 10 episodes of Seinfeld, averaging 6.6 on craft and 6.7 on impact for a career WAR of 2.1. Their comedy leans toward escalation. The highest-scoring line is below.
Funniest Police Officer Lines
Parking in a handicap spot.
You're under arrest for solicitation. Oh, wait a second. I... I have chicken soup.
The law requires you to help or assist anyone in danger as long as it's reasonable to do so. I never heard of that. It's new. It's called the Good Samaritan Law.
Wait a second. Why can't he go in headfirst? / He said the guy was just sitting over there. / What are you talking about? This guy was here first. / But he didn't take it. / Hey! It's his space! / No, it's his space!
What are you, deaf? I said, sit down. Hey, for the last time, sit down. -Oh, yeah.
All Jokes — 14 total
Do you ever find anything? - No.
You're under arrest for solicitation. Oh, wait a second. I... I have chicken soup.
Wait a second. Why can't he go in headfirst? / He said the guy was just sitting over there. / What are you talking about? This guy was here first. / But he didn't take it. / Hey! It's his space! / No, it's his space!
Excuse me, officer. There's a guy outside, and he's kind of a nut job, and I think he's waiting to beat me up. If you could just walk me outside and wait till I get into a cab... Yeah, all right. Just let me get a muffin.
What happened to the muffin? I got a little hungry. All of a sudden you get hungry? Yeah. You got a problem with that? No. Enjoy your lunch.
Parking in a handicap spot.
Hey, any of you guys want to be in the lineup? Make a quick 50 bucks? Sure. I will.
Hey, you. You with the high hair. Step forward. Me?
Lady, you sold me. Hey, you with the hose.
Okay, big daddy, take the hat off.
All right, turn to your right. I said turn, pimp!
What are you, deaf? I said, sit down. Hey, for the last time, sit down. -Oh, yeah.
We know you're bald. We know it's you.
The law requires you to help or assist anyone in danger as long as it's reasonable to do so. I never heard of that. It's new. It's called the Good Samaritan Law.