The Reluctant Fighter

Would you settle for Tony Banta... the bum?

You coming into my garage, you gonna leave me a dollar deposit.

It's non-refundable. That's okay, as long as I get it back.

and you were the sixth one that came to my mind.

Boy, it's kind of like a painter getting a chance to beat up on Rembrandt.

The stalls in the bathroom... They got doors.

I think I'll stick with nervous.

Hey, we make a great team, don't we? I mean, with my muscle and his brains, we can't lose. It's the other way around, Vince. Right.

I was married. Close enough.

His accountant and his lawyer? His Tuesday and his Wednesday.

Oh, I finally made it. Mistaken for cheap.

Nice shot of the wheelchair, ain't it?

That's it... I know what I got to do. I'm going to give that kid my kidney.

Sure, you've come this far without a brain.

I look over at my sofa, I see the Rodriguez fight. I look over at my armchair, I see the Jefferson fight. My little end tables are the Camillio brothers.

Wait a minute, wait a minute, let's make that a 27-inch. Ma's eyes ain't what they used to be.

You know how when you turn over one of those rocks and you see those slimy, crawly things underneath? Louie makes those things go 'yuck.'

We all know that when a loser wants to win, naturally he loses. It's a law of the universe. Banta's proven this time and time again. But... when a loser wants to lose...

the only way that he can stay a loser is to win.

Okay, okay, do you think we should get out of NATO?

What's NATO?

You want to ask Tony anything else, hail his cab. That way he gets to put it on the meter.

He still can't count to three, but he'll be okay.

Benny lost to a hack?

What'd you hit me with? The ball bearings from my wheelchair.

Nah, I've seen your record.

I'll stick around until you lose one. That could be weeks.

Too much skating between fights.

I don't want to interrupt you, I like what you're saying.

I don't want to interrupt you, I like what you're saying.

How come you didn't punch him like you punched me? I did better... I got his wallet.