Treehouse Of Horror Xiii

Ned Flanders:I'm all for Halloween fun...but a seance sounds a little PG-13.

Bart Simpson:Chill out, dudes. It's me, Bart Simpson.

Ned Flanders:Maude. You still look as pretty as the day I buried you.

Homer Simpson:But someone made me too many pancakes...and now I have to sleep them off.

Marge Simpson · Homer Simpson:Oh, those were for the Church breakfast. Were they now?

Hammock Salesman:Its webbing is a mesh of comfort and evil.

Homer Simpson:You had me at 'comfort.'

Homer Simpson:Mm-hm. Hmm, Mr. Hammock, say hello to Madam Ass. Unh!

Homer Simpson · Homer Clone:Hmm, no bellybutton. Shuttle's in the hangar.

Homer Simpson:Eh, he had a good run.

Homer Clone:Chores? Me need clone.

Homer Clone:Outfit good, flatters butt.

Homer Clone:Then after World War II, it got kind of quiet...till Superman challenged FDR to a race around the world.

Homer Clone:FDR beat him by a furlong. Or so the comic books would have you believe.

Homer Clone:Me good dad.

Homer Clone:Me not notice.

Homer Simpson:It would take three clones to beat the original Homer. Hmm. Huh, I mean four.

Homer Simpson · Ned Flanders:Yeah, but you have to leave a credit card. No problem. Discover okay?

Homer Simpson:Twenty-three.

Homer Simpson · Homer Clones:Now, before I abandon you in this cornfield...does anyone remember the way home? I do. Anybody else?

Gil:Ah, look at that corn. Old Gil's hard work is finally paying off. Well, at least I got my health.

Kent Brockman:Like comedy clubs in the late '80s, these ravenous clones are everywhere.

Kent Brockman:They've destroyed every building in town...except Moe's Tavern, which is reporting record business.

Moe · Lenny:Now, uh, who's gonna be picking up the tab? Lenny. Anything for Homers.

Military Official:Currently the, uh, Vietcong...I mean, the, uh, Homers are occupying these areas.

Wiggum · Unknown Official:Thank God. And you said we shouldn't let little girls in the war room. Look, I was wrong, okay?

Marge Simpson · Homer Clone:No bellybutton? You're a clone. Then the real homer... First over cliff.

Marge Simpson:My Homie's dead? How will I go on? You like back rub? Oh, well.

Bart Simpson · Lisa Simpson:Lisa has a dead boyfriend. He's not my dead boyfriend. He is a dead boy who happens to be my friend.

Homer Simpson:Or a frustrated novelist.

Snake:I'm sorry. I can't live without passion.

Snake Jailbird:I'm sorry. I can't live without passion.

Lou:That's what I like about this job, you learn stuff.

Moe:Now all I got is my enormous genitals.

Moe Szyslak:Now all I got is my enormous genitals.

Ralph Wiggum:The bumps tickle my bottom.

Billy the Kid:Looks like the only guns left are in my cold dead hands.

Billy the Kid:Looks like the only guns left are in my cold dead hands.

Jesse James · Kaiser Wilhelm:He ain't no cowboy. Sure I am. Yippy, wippy, wippy. Okay, he's in.

Billy the Kid:Now, let's rob the bank, give the money to the poor...then rob the poor and shoot the money.

Billy the Kid:That's piano! I said, 'pian-ee.'

Marge Simpson · Homer Simpson:These are horrible ghouls from the past. Hey, so are the Grammy judges. Ha-ha-ha, ugh!

Professor Frink:Oh, dear. Poor William Bonney might have become a doctor or a senator.

Homer Simpson:Future Daddy needs to double kill these corpses...so they won't come back as zombies and... Get him!

Homer Simpson:Another tragedy prevented by gun violence.

Unknown Character:What is this, open mike night?

Homer Simpson:What is this, open mike night?

Homer Simpson:Hey, what could be more fun than an island shaped like a big smiley face?

Dr. Hibbert:Yes, completely mad. About providing topnotch vacation values. Ha-ha-ha.

Homer Simpson:Ha, ha. I've been around Scotsmen.

Dr. Hibbert:Well, one activity you might enjoy is not asking questions.

Dr. Hibbert:Think what Shakespeare might've accomplished...if he'd had the eyes of an eagle or could spray stink on his critics.

Dr. Hibbert:Now, who'd like some turkey? It's a lovely nerd...I mean 'bird.'

Marge Simpson:'House of pain.' This must be where you pay the bill.

Marge Simpson:Why am I always so funny when no one's around?

Homer Simpson:And I've never seen you use your tail like that.

Homer Simpson:Which I have to admit, I sort of suspected during the sex.

Ned Flanders:Hate to be a needy Neddy, but could you do me a favor? Milk me.

Ned Flanders:Ooh, that's nice. You're actually quite gentle when you wanna be.

Guinea Pig Hybrid:We prefer 'Italian-American pigs.'

Homer Simpson · Bart Simpson:'Eat my shorts'? Why, you little...

Homer Simpson:It's great. I haven't been this skinny since high school.

Homer Simpson:Makes you think.