The Simpson family win a free spa weekend, and Homer is nearly killed when a mysterious figure locks him in a sauna. Chief Wiggum decides to hire someone who can think like a murderer in order to find one. Bart's mortal enemy Sideshow Bob is sent to live with the Simpsons so he can help find Homer's attempted killer. Bob and Homer track down the attempted murderer and discover that it is Frank Grimes, Jr., the son of a man that Homer drove to insanity (in the season eight episode "Homer's Enemy"). After Grimes is arrested, Bob tries to kill Bart, but he finds that he has "grown accustomed to [his] face" and cannot harm him.
WAR
67.1
Wins Above Replacement
“The Great Louse Detective” ranks #116 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 82.5 — Elite. The episode packs 78 scored jokes at 4.6 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.7 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Sideshow Bob: I've grown accustomed to his face / And dreams of gouging out his eyes
Homer: Bart, turn down that original cast recording and go to sleep.
Homer Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer · Sideshow Bob · Homer: Well, there's Mr. Burns... Fat Tony, the Emperor of Japan, ex-President Bush. / The late Frank Grimes. / PBS, Stephen Hawking... the fat little Dixie Chick. / And the state of Florida.
Sideshow Bob: Homer, if I could write haikus while skinheads beat me with soap... I can concentrate anywhere.
Sideshow Bob · Homer: How can one man have so many enemies? / I'm a people person. Who drinks.
All Jokes — 78 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer: Three minutes, 40 seconds... a new personal best.
Homer Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Homer · Marge: No one will ever know. / Mail call.
Homer: The 'George Foreman Mail Sorter' will let us know.
Homer Absurdist Observational Marge: It's where J-Lo hit P. Diddy upside the head with Gary Coleman.
Marge Absurdist Observational ★ Rewatch TV Announcer: Our attendants can take 10 years off your face... and stick it in your boobs.
TV Announcer: It's also for vain, effeminate men.
Homer · Kent: Kent Brockman? / Well, if you find this shocking, look at Tom Brokaw.
Kent: Truly, that was the greatest regeneration.
Kent Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Bart: This place blows. I'm gonna go float a Baby Ruth down a mineral bath.
Bart Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy Spa Worker · Bart · Lisa: Do you like Dr. Seuss? / No. / Then you'll love Dr. Mas-Seuss.
Dr. Mas-Seuss: Bad posture has floobled and snozzled your neck.
Marge: It just shows you God has a plan for every creature.
Marge Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Homer: [AS JOHNNY CARSON] The American taxpayer!
Homer Callback Meta/Self-Referential Callback Marge: Oh, my God. A naked celebrity. Be cool. Don't stare at his famous wang.
Marge Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Celebrity: Go ahead, look. The whole world already saw it in Nudist Camp Commandant. 'I wore nothing!'
Homer: Do not use steam room if you are overweight or have a heart condition. [GULPS] Wait a minute. I'm not wearing a shirt.
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection Paramedic · Homer: Who ordered the steamed gentile? / Mm, steamed gentile.
Chief Wiggum · Homer: Now, Mr. Simpson, is it possible you're living a double... or triple life that your wife doesn't know about? / Triple? No. Definitely no.
Chief Wiggum · Lou: Where on my badge does it say anything about protecting people? / Uh, second word, chief.
Chief Wiggum: Thanks, Princeton Pete.
Homer · Chief Wiggum: Paris? / No. No, not Paris. I'm never gonna go to Paris.
Chief Wiggum · Decapitating Harry: Each one crazier than the last. Uh, come to think of it... he should be there and this guy, he should be over there. / Wait. You're saying he's crazier than I am? / That's exactly what I'm saying, Decapitating Harry.
Marge · Homer · Lisa: It beats Disney's California Adventure. / Oh, yeah. / Yeah, that's true.
Computer · Chief Wiggum: Access denied. / Oh, fine. I gotta use a fork.
Sideshow Bob · Bart · Lisa: Hello, Bart. / Aah! Sideshow Bob! / Oh, come now. We've been through so much together. Just call me Bob. / Aah! Bob!
Chief Wiggum · Sideshow Bob: This year, I think it's Man of La Mancha. Yeah. Don Quixote, Sancho Panza... Dr. Carrasco, you know, they're all great parts. / Ugh, what a great show. I wish it was today.
Marge: Then you might as well stay with us. We serve the same meat the prisons do.
Marge Deadpan/Understatement Bart: This man has tried to kill me so much, it's not funny.
Bart Irony/Sarcasm Meta/Self-Referential Bart · Homer: Dad, I can't believe you're putting my life at risk to save your own. / You'll understand someday when you have kids.
Chief Wiggum · Sideshow Bob: And don't try taking it off because it's taped to your leg hair. / And that really hurts.
Sideshow Bob · Chief Wiggum: As gentlemen, surely we can just agree to... Dear God! / Sorry. / Fair enough. But now that we know what it can do, there's no need to... Mother!
Bart: Wow. You don't even have to point it at him.
Bart Observational Deadpan/Understatement Homer · Sideshow Bob · Homer: Well, there's Mr. Burns... Fat Tony, the Emperor of Japan, ex-President Bush. / The late Frank Grimes. / PBS, Stephen Hawking... the fat little Dixie Chick. / And the state of Florida.
Sideshow Bob · Homer: How can one man have so many enemies? / I'm a people person. Who drinks.
Sideshow Bob · Homer: This is a normal day? / I just wanted to impress you.
Sideshow Bob · Previous King: Didn't last year's king have to abdicate because he married a commoner? / And I'd do it again. But I do miss the Royal Crown Cola.
Sideshow Bob: Ah, yes, the Kwik-E-Mart. I haven't been here since I robbed it dressed as Krusty. / My one successful crime.
Sideshow Bob: Our time is passing, old friend.
Snake: Uh, if you two country hens are finished clucking... I'd like to buy a copy of Jugs and Ammo.
Snake Character Comedy Absurdist Sideshow Bob: Well, we've settled that argument. You can't read a magazine and drive.
Mechanic · Homer: But your car was built in Croatia. It's made from old Soviet tanks. / Just fix it, Mr. Sasswrench.
Homer: Right, right. I'm counting the pennies in the ashtray. / There's two.
Homer Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Homer · Sideshow Bob: You're so smart. Shock him. / Odds Bodkins!
Sideshow Bob: Now who's the sociopath, huh?
Sideshow Bob: These are Homer's friends and family. They don't want him dead. They just want him to suffer.
Frank Grimes Jr. · Sideshow Bob · Homer: Once I kill you, everyone will think I'm the real Homer. Ha-ha-ha. / None of this seems odd to you? / Meh.
Moe: Yeah. A kid should be real simple to kill. I'd come up behind him with a knife and slit his throat real quick.
Moe Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Sideshow Bob: Homer, if I could write haikus while skinheads beat me with soap... I can concentrate anywhere.
Marge: Oh, why didn't I take more photos? / Memories / Like the corners of my mind
Marge Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Homer: Ha, ha. I thought I could get it while it was in the recharger. / I was wrong.
Homer Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Bart: I don't know how we ever had fun without him.
Bart Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy That 30s Show Characters: Hey, Pop, where's the crank on this Victrola? / Why, it's the latest model. From now on, the only crank in this house is your Aunt Gladys. / For your information, I'm cranky because I've got polio.
Sideshow Bob: Tom Shales gave this show a good review and I'm the one in prison.
Homer · Parade Official: Aah! Don't look at me. / Homer Simpson? / Right here.
Homer: Whoo-hoo! Good things do happen to bad people.
Homer: Marge, you're embarrassing me in front of the drag queen.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy Kent Brockman: In a related story, Homer Simpson may not have long to live.
Homer · Marge: This is a way to flush this killer out once and for all. And get drunk on a Tuesday. / Today's Tuesday. And you've had six beers. / But I'm not drunk.
Lou · Chief Wiggum: So, uh, you're from Tempe? I'm from Chicago. / Whoa, I'm so drunk I'm gonna puke. You ever get that feeling, beautiful?
Homer: America loves its kings, from George III to Larry.
Homer Absurdist Observational Homer: Phew. Just Italians.
Homer Character Comedy Observational Homer: Attention, drunken idiots. This is your king. Sacrifice yourselves to slow me down.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Crowd Member · Homer: Hey, how about some beads? / They're not for dudes. / That's cool.
Chief Wiggum: That museum has been nothing but trouble since it opened.
Sideshow Bob: I saved a life. And it feels wonderful.
Sideshow Bob · Homer: And yet, I could just as easily drop you to your death. / Don't be so sure. I got my legs wrapped around your ass pretty tight.
Sideshow Bob · Homer: And yet, I could just as easily drop you to your death. Don't be so sure. I got my legs wrapped around your ass pretty tight.
Homer: Everything going dark. Like Duff Stout, the beer that made Ireland famous. I love you, Doris.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Homer · Religious Person: Your king needs these stilts. / Jesus is our only king. / Not anymore.
Homer: Oh, yeah. How is old Grimey?
Homer Character Comedy Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Frank Grimes Jr.: He happened to like hookers, okay?
Chief Wiggum · Lou: If I can tranq out just one freak on stilts... I know I've done my job. / You're living the dream, chief.
Homer: Yeah, it's every parent's dream to outlive their children.
Homer Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Sideshow Bob · Bart: I... I can't do it. / Why not? / Well, I guess I've, dear God... grown accustomed to your face.
Sideshow Bob: I've grown accustomed to his face / And dreams of gouging out his eyes
Homer: Bart, turn down that original cast recording and go to sleep.
Homer Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Sideshow Bob · Bart: This isn't a duet. / Sorry.
Sideshow Bob: We shall meet again, old friend. But now I must steal away into the night.
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