The Devils Hands Are Idle Playthings

Fry:I choose to not understand these signs.

Fry:Bender! I was just not playing the holophonor.

Bender:Yeah, well, you should try not stinking at it.

Bender:Isn't it time you gave up all hope of ever improving yourself in any way?

Bender:You know, sometimes I wish your real parents were still alive. Not often, though.

Mrs. Mellonger · Bender:Is it true that you're a robot? I prefer the term 'love machine.'

Bender · Mrs. Mellonger:Your kid is great. How hard you say you had to hit him? Fairly hard.

audience member:It's too grumpy!

Bender:You know what always cheers me up? Laughing at other people's misfortunes!

Leela:I used to listen for hours while he sat naked on my couch and improvised.

Bender:So musicians really Rodger your Hammerstein?

Leela:He was pasty and hunched. Pretty boy.

Leela:Then one day I found someone else's couch fibers on his butt.

Bender:And by devil, I mean Robot Devil. And by metaphorically, I mean get your coat.

Robot Devil:You hit a sour note about 200 years back, Doug!

Robot Devil:Hell is full of 10-Year-Olds who wanted exactly the same thing.

Robot Devil:With hands like that you'll be lucky to master a belt buckle.

Fry:Sure would. Oh, well, goodbye.

Bender:I think he's willing to make some kind of deal with the devil with you.

Robot Devil:It's just the sort of guy I am.

Bender:If you don't take this offer, I will lose all respect for you and punch you.

Fry · Robot Devil:You sure I won't know him? Definitely probably not.

background character:I got 100 bucks on Rectal Exam-Bot!

Background character:I got 100 bucks on Rectal Exam-Bot!

Fry:It's not ironic, it's just coincidental.

Robot Devil:Oh, sorry. That'll wear off in a couple of days.

Robot Devil:These things are always touching me in places.

Fry:Yeah, they get around. But I'm afraid we had a deal.

Zoidberg:Oh, Zoidberg, at last you're becoming a crafty consumer.

Hedonism-Bot:Your latest performance was as delectable as dipping my bottom over and over into a bath of the silkiest oils and creams.

Hedonism-Bot:You are the sole diversion in what has been a pale and unamusing season.

Hedonism-Bot:A man writing an opera about a woman? Oh, sirrah. How deliciously absurd.

Fry:So is a peacock, but you don't eat it until it's cooked.

Leela:I've been a fool. A fully justified, prudent fool.

Robot Devil:Ah! They're so cold! And yet hell is so hot!

Bender:I suppose I've always wondered what it would be like to be more annoying.

Bender:Grabby and Squeezy? Never! I love these guys!

Robot Devil:My ridiculously circuitous plan is one quarter complete.

Bender · Leela:Pretty annoying, huh, Leela? What? Are you talking? Oh, God, I'm deaf!

Robot Devil:Oh, how delightfully ironic.

Leela:It's not ironic. It's just mean.

audience member:I watch TV with that guy!

Leela:Amy, Fry's looking at me. What am I supposed to be feeling?

Leela:I don't recall ever fighting Godzilla. But that is so what I would've done.

Robot Devil:I'll just have a Shirley Hemple.

Leela:I can hear like a safecracker!

Hedonism-Bot:Stupider? This opera's as lousy as it is brilliant!

Robot Devil:Your lyrics lack subtlety. You can't just have your characters announce how they feel.

Robot Devil:That makes me feel angry!

Robot Devil:Now that is irony...

Robot Devil:'I'll give you my hand.' In marriage... 'The use of words expressing something Other than their literal intention'... Now that is irony...

Bender:I can't believe the devil... Is so unforgiving... I can't believe... Everybody's just ad-libbing...

Hedonism-Bot:Surgery in an opera? How wonderfully decadent! And just as I was beginning to lose interest.

Fry:My hands! My horrible human hands!

Fry · Robot Devil:And what did you do to my nails? I cleaned them.

Zoidberg:The music's bad and you should feel bad!

Zoidberg:The music's bad and you should feel bad!

newspaper seller:Greatest opera of all time sucks!