Leela meets up with her former orphanarium playmate Adlai Atkins, now a plastic surgeon, who offers to grant Leela surgery that will give her two eyes. Meanwhile, Bender adopts twelve orphans in order to collect $1200 in government stipends.
WAR
80.9
Wins Above Replacement
“The Cyber House Rules” ranks #5 of 170 Futurama episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 87.0 — Elite. The episode packs 76 scored jokes at 4.4 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 6.9 on impact, with Bender landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Mr. Vogel · Leela: Leela, you're worthless, and no one will ever love you! - You used to say that all the time. - Oh, those were happier days.
Leela: By the end of the day, one of us is gonna have one eye.
Leela Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bender: Bender's Arrest Record, by the police.
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Adlai · Leela: I'd like an extra-beautiful bouquet for my extra-gorgeous sweetheart. - Average, please.
Bender: Imperial Dragon restaurant? I've got a herd of you-know-whats for sale.
Bender Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback All Jokes — 76 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Unknown Character: They were delicious. But, I digress. Tremble, puny earthlings! One day my race will destroy you all!
Leela · Bender: I was abandoned as a baby too. So... - Garbage, huh? I'll take care of it.
Leela · Bender: Bender, stop! It's a baby! - A baby what?
Automated Message: Please stand clear of self-destructing basket.
Young Leela · Blind Kid: How can you make fun of me? You're blind. - My eyes may not work, but at least I got two of them.
Bender: Imagine the look on their faces when we eat all the hors d'oeuvres.
Bender Character Comedy Escalation Leela: Gosh, the bars on the windows seemed so much thicker back then.
Leela Dark/Subversive Observational ★ Rewatch Mr. Vogel · Leela: Leela, you're worthless, and no one will ever love you! - You used to say that all the time. - Oh, those were happier days.
Fry · Amy: The gristle in a blanket isn't half bad. - Try the Popsicle sticks. They've absorbed a lot of flavor.
Amy · Leela: I don't see you anywhere. - That's me over in Cootietown.
Amy Leela Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort Kids · One Kid: One-eye! One-eye! - Stupid as a French guy!
Orphan 1 · Orphan 2: Living in a box. You? - Selling kidneys, teeth, whatever.
Leela: And what am I up to, you ask? Why, I'm a very successful space captain.
Leela Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Orphans · Leela: That's so good for a person with one eye. - Hey, you can't feel sorry for me. I'm a space captain, and you're a bunch of losers. - Right, right. We're the losers.
Leela · Other Orphan: Oh, yeah? Well, shut up, cane-boy! - He can't hear you. He's deaf now.
Adlai: She's not gussied up, duded out or where it's at.
Adlai Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Leela: I guess you never outgrow being an eyeball. Oddball.
Leela Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Adlai: A package is just a box until it's delivered.
Adlai Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Leela: A tall doctor, you say?
Bender · Man: It's a great way to have a kid without sex. - Really?
Bender: A hundred dollars a week?
Bender Reaction Beat Character Comedy Leela: I broke that blind kid's nose, and it made no difference.
Leela Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Adlai: It won't be able to see, but you'll look like a normal two-eyed person.
Adlai Irony/Sarcasm Absurdist ★ Rewatch Fry · Bender: Why are they with you? Do you have candy? - No. It's called parenting.
Kid: Our daddy's a giant toy!
Kid Observational Character Comedy Amy: I used to be too cute, so I had cuteness reduction surgery here and here.
Amy Absurdist Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Fry: You're better, you're abnormal!
Fry Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Leela: I'll start by not caring what you think.
Leela Setup/Punchline Irony/Sarcasm Zoidberg: You can also get an ink pouch to help you escape your enemies.
Zoidberg: That's the stupidest idea I've ever heard, you imbecile!
Zoidberg Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Adlai: Oh, I'm sorry. This is the wrong patient.
Adlai Visual Gag Misdirection Fry · Amy · Hermes: She looked fine before. - No. - Wrong.
Leela: I try not to blink too much, because it's flashy. But when I do, I enjoy it.
Leela Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Leela Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bender Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Bender: Now you're all named Bender Jr.!
Bender Character Comedy Escalation Bender: Twelve baby humans, 1200 wing-wangs.
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist Bender: What is it with you kids? Every other day, it's food, food, food!
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Bender: The cat shelter's onto me.
Bender Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Adlai: I was getting one of my shirts toned down, so I dropped in for your exam.
Adlai Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Adlai · Leela: Perfect. A guy could fall head over heels for you. - I'm interested myself.
Adlai: I'm not good with words, so I'm in a delicate conundrum.
Adlai Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hermes · Zoidberg: Most doctors are rich. - When did this happen? - You're joking, right? That's not funny!
Bender: Let me ditch the kids in an alley, and we can go have some fun.
Bender Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bender: Daddy's trying to score with a cheap floozy right now, so cram a Tinkertoy in it.
Bender Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Child · Bender: I love you, Daddy Bender. - What the hell? Quit hugging me!
Bender: I've got half a mind to hug each and every one of you, and see how you like it!
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Adlai · Leela: I'd like an extra-beautiful bouquet for my extra-gorgeous sweetheart. - Average, please.
Adlai: You're 999,999 in a million.
Adlai Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Fry · Zoidberg: He's a weird monster who eats garbage. - Damn right.
Hermes Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Fry · Hermes: Hermes is a Rastafarian accountant. - Tally me banana.
Fry Character Comedy Reaction Beat Bender · Child: What do we say when you get something? - About time!
Child · Bender: I gotta go poopy! - You should've gone before it was time to run.
Restaurant Owner: You little crooks! If I catch you, I'm gonna make cutie-muffin gumbo!
Adlai: It's time to stop living this vida bachelor loca and have kids.
Adlai Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Bender: Bender's Arrest Record, by the police.
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Bender: I get 100 bucks a kid, and they're costing 110!
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Bender: Imperial Dragon restaurant? I've got a herd of you-know-whats for sale.
Bender Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bender: Imperial Dragon restaurant? I've got a herd of you-know-whats for sale.
Bender Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Bender: Bender's Orphanarium means discount orphans.
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist Adlai Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Bender: Purebred human. No vampire in there.
Bender Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bender: Cursed with a third ear but full of an emotion I understand is called love.
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Bender: You princes of Maine, you kings of New New England.
Bender Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bender: If you had kids of your own, you'd understand!
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Kids: Ear-face, Ear-face Sally won the ugly race
Kids Cringe/Discomfort Dark/Subversive Leela · Adlai · Leela: She doesn't need an operation. She's fine this way. - And you were fine the way you were? - Damn right I was!
Sally: I also have a tail.
Sally Escalation Deadpan/Understatement Leela: By the end of the day, one of us is gonna have one eye.
Leela Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Kids: We know robots don't have emotions, but we drawed you this picture.
Kids Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Bender: Hey, I smoke a cigar, not a candy cane.
Bender Character Comedy Reaction Beat Bender: Hey, I smoke a cigar, not a candy cane.
Bender Character Comedy Visual Gag Bender: I hate you! I hate you all!
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch