The Cyber House Rules

Unknown Character:They were delicious. But, I digress. Tremble, puny earthlings! One day my race will destroy you all!

Leela · Bender:I was abandoned as a baby too. So... - Garbage, huh? I'll take care of it.

Leela · Bender:Bender, stop! It's a baby! - A baby what?

Automated Message:Please stand clear of self-destructing basket.

Leela:No way, Jose-bot.

Young Leela · Blind Kid:How can you make fun of me? You're blind. - My eyes may not work, but at least I got two of them.

Bender:Imagine the look on their faces when we eat all the hors d'oeuvres.

Leela:Gosh, the bars on the windows seemed so much thicker back then.

Mr. Vogel · Leela:Leela, you're worthless, and no one will ever love you! - You used to say that all the time. - Oh, those were happier days.

Fry · Amy:The gristle in a blanket isn't half bad. - Try the Popsicle sticks. They've absorbed a lot of flavor.

Amy · Leela:I don't see you anywhere. - That's me over in Cootietown.

Kids · One Kid:One-eye! One-eye! - Stupid as a French guy!

Orphan 1 · Orphan 2:Living in a box. You? - Selling kidneys, teeth, whatever.

Leela:And what am I up to, you ask? Why, I'm a very successful space captain.

Orphans · Leela:That's so good for a person with one eye. - Hey, you can't feel sorry for me. I'm a space captain, and you're a bunch of losers. - Right, right. We're the losers.

Leela · Other Orphan:Oh, yeah? Well, shut up, cane-boy! - He can't hear you. He's deaf now.

Adlai:She's not gussied up, duded out or where it's at.

Leela:I guess you never outgrow being an eyeball. Oddball.

Adlai:A package is just a box until it's delivered.

Leela:A tall doctor, you say?

Bender · Man:It's a great way to have a kid without sex. - Really?

Bender:A hundred dollars a week?

Leela:I broke that blind kid's nose, and it made no difference.

Adlai:It won't be able to see, but you'll look like a normal two-eyed person.

Fry · Bender:Why are they with you? Do you have candy? - No. It's called parenting.

Kid:Our daddy's a giant toy!

Amy:I used to be too cute, so I had cuteness reduction surgery here and here.

Fry:You're better, you're abnormal!

Leela:I'll start by not caring what you think.

Zoidberg:You can also get an ink pouch to help you escape your enemies.

Zoidberg:That's the stupidest idea I've ever heard, you imbecile!

Adlai:Oh, I'm sorry. This is the wrong patient.

Fry · Amy · Hermes:She looked fine before. - No. - Wrong.

Leela:I try not to blink too much, because it's flashy. But when I do, I enjoy it.

Leela:I did it! I blunk!

Bender:Kids have names?

Bender:Now you're all named Bender Jr.!

Bender:Twelve baby humans, 1200 wing-wangs.

Bender:What is it with you kids? Every other day, it's food, food, food!

Bender:The cat shelter's onto me.

Adlai:I was getting one of my shirts toned down, so I dropped in for your exam.

Adlai · Leela:Perfect. A guy could fall head over heels for you. - I'm interested myself.

Adlai:I'm not good with words, so I'm in a delicate conundrum.

Hermes · Zoidberg:Most doctors are rich. - When did this happen? - You're joking, right? That's not funny!

Bender:Let me ditch the kids in an alley, and we can go have some fun.

Bender:Daddy's trying to score with a cheap floozy right now, so cram a Tinkertoy in it.

Child · Bender:I love you, Daddy Bender. - What the hell? Quit hugging me!

Bender:I've got half a mind to hug each and every one of you, and see how you like it!

Adlai · Leela:I'd like an extra-beautiful bouquet for my extra-gorgeous sweetheart. - Average, please.

Adlai:You're 999,999 in a million.

Fry · Zoidberg:He's a weird monster who eats garbage. - Damn right.

Hermes:Tally me banana.

Fry · Hermes:Hermes is a Rastafarian accountant. - Tally me banana.

Fry:I already did!

Bender · Child:What do we say when you get something? - About time!

Child · Bender:I gotta go poopy! - You should've gone before it was time to run.

Restaurant Owner:You little crooks! If I catch you, I'm gonna make cutie-muffin gumbo!

Adlai:It's time to stop living this vida bachelor loca and have kids.

Bender:Bender's Arrest Record, by the police.

Bender:I get 100 bucks a kid, and they're costing 110!

Bender:Imperial Dragon restaurant? I've got a herd of you-know-whats for sale.

Bender:Imperial Dragon restaurant? I've got a herd of you-know-whats for sale.

Bender:Bender's Orphanarium means discount orphans.

Adlai:Kind of fatty.

Bender:Purebred human. No vampire in there.

Bender:Cursed with a third ear but full of an emotion I understand is called love.

Bender:You princes of Maine, you kings of New New England.

Bender:If you had kids of your own, you'd understand!

Kids:Ear-face, Ear-face Sally won the ugly race

Leela · Adlai · Leela:She doesn't need an operation. She's fine this way. - And you were fine the way you were? - Damn right I was!

Sally:I also have a tail.

Leela:By the end of the day, one of us is gonna have one eye.

Kids:We know robots don't have emotions, but we drawed you this picture.

Bender:Hey, I smoke a cigar, not a candy cane.

Bender:Hey, I smoke a cigar, not a candy cane.

Bender:I hate you! I hate you all!