Amy

Amy · Bender · Farnsworth:Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh! [BENDER BURPS] -You!

Amy · Bender:Lord, Bender, you're filthy. Like you don't have crap in your neck.

Amy · Bender:Does it hurt when I go like this? Ow! A little.

Bender · Amy:What's your sorority? -Kappa Kappa Wong.

Amy:Aye, aye, captain. I mean, Only One Eye. I mean, yes, sir. Ma'am.

Amy:Next year in Jerusalem!

Amy · Fry:Hey, do you realize you're standing at a weird angle? Now you're okay.

Amy:This is for you, Fry... Zevulon the great. He's teriyaki-style.

Amy:Possibly his vile lizard tongue.

Amy:If you rule out every guy... with a lizard tongue or a low I.Q.... or an explosive, violent temper... of course you're going to be lonely.

Amy:Sometimes you meet a guy and think he's a pig... but then later on, you realize he actually has a really good body.

Amy:That sounds like a cry for help. Let's all take her out tonight.

Amy:The Federal Sex Bureau. A saucy puppet show. The rotting carcass of a whale.

Amy · Bender:Why's everyone wearing those rings? Because nobody wears them anymore. Rings are stupid.

Hipster · Amy:Hey, did that lad just say rings are cool? Nope. He said they're stupid. Cool!

Amy:I've got what they call 'gaydar.'

Amy:Unless I'm getting interference from a gay weather balloon.

Amy · Bolt:I think she means ten wins on the gay circuit. I wish. Those cats can really fly.

Amy:This is M-5438, an entity of pure energy.

Amy:I think he comes from a dimension... that's big on musical theater.

Amy:Just in case you guys hit it off... you'll want to take this with you.

Amy:Oh, my God! Oh, how could you, Leela? I thought you had some standards. I mean, geez, he's a dumb gross gorilla.

Amy · Bender:Come on, Bender. Last month, it was Robomadom. / And before that, Robonza.

Someone · Amy:'How we doing, Amy?' 'We're 1/10 of the way there.'

Amy:They shut it down after all those people... caught salmonella from the flume ride.

Professor · Amy:It's my way of thanking you for not reporting my countless violations... of safety and minimum-wage laws. / Aw, you!

Amy:Before or after you slept with him?

Zoidberg · Amy:I think I'll go fill up on bisque at the buffet. / That just leaves you and your fake fiancé... all alone on a romantic cruise.

Amy · Professor · Zoidberg:Don't cry. Nobody knows what happens in a black hole. It's possible she's alive in another dimension, right? / Oh, yes. Absolutely. / Not a chance.

Amy:Everyone knows 20th-century colleges were really expensive daycare centers.

Professor · Amy:- Like a cheap French harlot. - French?

Amy:Oh, yes.

Amy:Plus, you don't have the thighs for a miniskirt.

Bender · Amy · Bender:I'm 40% zinc. / Then Echinacea or St. John's wort. / Or a big fat placebo. It's all the same crap.

Amy · Fry:That's my watch. / I was wondering where I put that.

Bender · Amy:Bite my shiny, metal ass. / You couldn't afford it, honey.

Amy:Weren't there more people at the start of the tour?

Amy · Bender:What's your party, Bender? I can't vote. Because you're a robot? No, a felon.

Amy · Professor Farnsworth:She's an orphan. Yes. And the only one of her species in all the known universe.

Amy · Professor Farnsworth:But I sold my hair to a wigmaker to buy a set of combs for Hermes. Oh, the irony. I sold my hair so I could buy this third set of combs for Zoidberg.

Hermes · Amy · Amy:A set of combs for your beautiful hair. / Oh, that's so sweet. / But I sold my hair to a wigmaker to buy a set of combs for Hermes.

Amy · Zoidberg:What up, Dr. Z? - Yo, yo. What's up? Give up the rock!

Amy · Zoidberg:What's that jazz on your head? - Enough questions. More weight!

Amy:Maybe you could do more reps with less weight

Amy:Fool me seven times, shame on you. Fool me eight times, shame on me

Amy · Bender:Maybe he has a parasite. - Maybe he is one

Professor · Amy:You're just heavy with male jelly. - Blech!

Amy:If a guy ever did that, I'd know it. Wait a second. They've all done that. Even Sean!

Amy:My parents said if I got B's, they'd buy me a bar. I got all C's!

Amy · Fry:Sixty thousand! ... I thought it was an auction

Amy · Victor:The sticker says $55,000. But we'll only go as high as, say... Sixty thousand!

Victor · Amy:He is not too happy. I'm sorry. Eighty thousand?

Amy · Fry:The usual. Boiling lead, lava. So, what? Shorts?

Amy:Boy, this a/c is incredible. I better turn on the heater too

Amy:This heater is incredible! I better turn up the a/c some more

Amy:If you were, they'd be all, 'Straighten your pope hat' and 'Put on your good vestments'

Amy:It's nice to find someone I can talk to about stuff, and junk. It's like we feel the same way about junk and stuff, or whatever

Amy:While they tow us, you wanna do it?

Fry · Amy:You know how you like chocolate but get tired of it... when it always wants to hang out? You don't like chocolate? Can chocolate let me finish?

Amy:Looks like we'll be spending a lot more time together, Fry

Amy:Looks like we'll be spending a lot more time together, Fry.

Fry · Amy:I'll try not to interfere in your life. Sorry. I guess I control that arm

Amy:With my body, I think you'll only attract one sort of woman

Fry · Amy:Okay, we're done with the bra. Why did you shave? Expecting something to happen with the date?

Amy · Fry:It's deodorant. What does it do?

Amy:If I ever feel lonely... I'll look at this disfiguring scar and think of you

Professor · Amy · Bender · Leela · Fry:Feast your eyes on this! It's beautiful! And huge! Can I touch it? What is it, already?

Amy · Leela · Professor:When I was a little girl, I dreamed of being Miss Universe. That's pathetic. Deep down, all girls wanna be Miss Universe. Not me. Really? Maybe it's just cute girls.

Amy:Switch to a garlic shampoo.

Amy · Leela:Sounds great, Hermes! Whatever you say.

Bender · Amy:Ask Flabby here to describe it to you later. She is as the factory made her. They should have stopped about halfway through.

Amy:Two robots enter, one robot leaves. The other leaves after being declared the winner.

Amy:I'm pretty sure I did. Yes, definitely.

Amy:Oh, my God! It's Elzar, the TV chef! Kill me now, people!

Leela · Amy:So this is where they stick old people! It's horrific! It does keep them from driving.

Leela · Amy:Harpoon my ass! Okay!

Amy:What you need is this fish pheromone. The most potent aphrodisiac known to fishkind.

Amy · Leela:What happened to my parasol? It wasn't here when I took your umbrella.

Amy:In the event of emergency, my ass can be used as flotation device.

Amy · Elzar:The king crab is to die for! Look, a tiny, edible crown! What's it made of? Wood.

Amy · Fry:It's robot food. It's so good! Just try a little. No, really, I don't... Are you all right? Oh, yeah, the salad's fantastic! So fresh.

Fry · Amy · Leela · Professor:Bender's a model employee! He's so polite! And hardworking. He's made of candy.

Amy:He was like a computer that ran on magic.

Amy · Leela · Amy:They're tasty. What about Tasty-cles? Not that. Why not? It sounds like frozen mountain oysters on a stick. You know, Test-cicles.

Amy · Fry:Parrots talk and we eat them, right? Maybe it learned as a parlor trick. Like Fry. Like Fry! Like Fry!

Amy:No, this one blew his money on lottery tickets.

Amy:Who wants lobster bisque?

Hermes · Amy · Fry · Leela:Mail call! Amy, your designer lingerie catalog. Fry, Sadie's Bra Parade. And Leela, Bulk Underpants Outlet.

Bender · Amy:I just need sleep. I had nightmares about cars running people over. Many dream of a fresh new look. And Mary Kay can make those dreams come true.

Amy:It was probably just a golden marmoset.

Amy:For one beautiful night, I knew what it was to be a grandmother. Subjugated, yet honored.

Amy · Michelle:Because he didn't in your time. True. But I used to fit in really well. Then good luck, sister.

Amy:It's gorgeous. That place used to be a dump.

Amy:Let's go where he won't put his finger.

Bender · Amy:Better known as the love muscle. / Which digests food.

Amy:He'll be lucky to have bones left.

Amy · Zoidberg:Those were toenail clippings. A feast is a feast.

Amy:Did you swallow your phone again?

Amy · Kif:Really? Honest and true? - Yes. And that person calling and hanging up was me.

Amy:That's not an L! Unless you count lowercase.

Amy:We've got robots on the ceiling.

Amy · Zoidberg:Let's buy Internet stock! On margin! Zoidbee wanna buy on margin!

Amy:The new one's out!

Amy:They're so cute, like if puppies and kittens could have babies.

Fry · Amy · Fry:They sent us inside for doing an unsatisfactory job. - And eating penguin eggs. - You ate most of them.

Amy · Free Waterfall Sr.:Really? How about blowing up dams? - Yeah, that is fun.

Amy:That'll teach those horses to take drugs.

Amy:It also opened my calendar to Friday and ordered some french fries.

Fry · Amy:The gristle in a blanket isn't half bad. - Try the Popsicle sticks. They've absorbed a lot of flavor.

Amy · Leela:I don't see you anywhere. - That's me over in Cootietown.

Amy:I used to be too cute, so I had cuteness reduction surgery here and here.

Fry · Amy · Hermes:She looked fine before. - No. - Wrong.

Amy:Oh, lots of reasons.

Amy:You're going to do his laundry?

Amy:Don't kill me! I'm coming down with Stockholm Syndrome... handsome.

Amy:Thanks for saving us, Fry. I'm gonna continue never washing this cheek again.

Amy:I'm gonna continue never washing this cheek again.

Amy:Can we crash here? The colors in the van keep us awake.

Amy:Can we crash here? The colors in the van keep us awake.

Amy · Leela · Amy · Zoidberg:They're beautiful! - You're touching them! I've never seen pearls like this. You're amazing! - I am? At last! Recognition!

Amy:Is it my outfit?

Amy · Everyone:I hope you find out what's wrong before we skip my birthd... / Happy birthday, Amy.

Amy:I hope we all have as much fun tomorrow at my birth... What?

Amy:You are so smart.

Amy · Bender:You know what might be a hoot? - No. Why would I know that?

Amy · Leela:Everything? - Except that.

Amy:Funny, you live in the universe... but you never do these things till someone visits.

Amy:Of course. You should read a blimp.

Amy · Bender:But Fry's our friend, Bender. - Will you stifle there, meat bag?

Leela · Amy · Amy:You stifle, Bender. - Finally you're standing up to him. - Although he is completely right.

Amy:That was incredible, Bender. You're like Jackie Chan before he got doughy.

Amy:I'll have soylent green... With a soylent orange and soylent coleslaw.

Amy:Oh! Pushing.

Leela · Professor · Amy:The factory's pollution caused a greenhouse effect. - That would explain this heat. - And your shorts.

Amy · Bender:You look a lot better than you used to. You're not so bad yourself, big boy.

Amy:Speak for yourself.

Professor · Amy:He's dead. When did he die? About twelve hours ago when the party started. But he just said 'Woo!' No, that was air escaping from the folds of his fat.

Amy:Hey, watch out! Uh-oh! Oh, my God! He ate Fry! Fry is dead!

Amy · Leela:Those are great shoes! Oh, thank you. Do they come in women's sizes?

Amy · Leela:Romanticorp? Are they a corporation that makes romantic stuff? Very good, Amy.

Amy:Do any of you collect Lovey Bears? I do. Kif's given me dozens.

Amy:Does that dummy have a brother?

Amy:You have much to teach us.

Amy · Leela:Lighten up. It's funny. - Of course. But you don't have to laugh!

RJ · Amy:Wrong way. - Smooth.

Amy:Look on the bright side. My parents left after you passed out, so they didn't see you barf.

Amy:I'll go get you a tissue from your tote.

Amy · Leo Wong:Don't worry, Daddy. It'll be okay. - Oh, really? Who gonna save us? One-eye? Lobster mooch? Drunken garbage can?

Inez Wong · Amy · Leela:Okay, I want a divorce. - Mom! Dad! Don't ask me to choose! - They're not your parents. I'm not your sister. And that's not your golf cart.

Leo Wong · Amy · Inez Wong:We can't lose! - No, it's too risky! You don't have to do this to prove you're a man. - Oh, yes, he does!

Amy:Is that your camouflage reflex, or are you just happy to see me?

Amy · Kif:But you still have them? - Yes. But I keep them inside until I can write them in my diary.

Amy · Kif:What's that? - Maybe we just made love.

Amy:Wait! I'm too rich to be kidnapped!

Singing Wind · Amy:We assumed our ancestors were cheated... because they not have concept of ownership. - So we can have the diamond? - No. We do have concept of ownership.

Amy:Well, gloviously. But if they liked you, then I wouldn't. Don't you know anything about girls?

News Anchor · Leela · Amy:Holy Spitz! He's sporting skintight Speedos. - They don't leave much to be imagined. - On a robot, they do.

Amy:If you needed a package brought into the country without x-raying... Bender always had a free body cavity.

Amy:That's the only thing about being a slave.

Amy:Insane theories: one. Regular theories: a billion!

Amy:Your apartment smells like Polygrip and cat pee!

Amy · someone:I move your cat stinks and is ugly! - Second.

Amy:I'm a millionaire! Suddenly I have an opinion about the capital gains tax!

Amy · Dr. Zoidberg:You didn't refrigerate it, spineless! - You had to drag spines into this!

Amy · Leela · Amy:Can I pat you on the butt? I'm a professional athlete. So go ahead. Now I'm too nervous.

Amy:Oh, God, my tract!

Amy:What would it cost to get my tongue removed?

Amy · Melllvar:Can people who hate Star Trek leave? Good question. No, you have to stay even longer! Oh!

Amy:What's going on? Is this angry yelling, or busted-hearing-aid yelling?

Amy:When he got home from the Senate.

Reality TV participant · Amy:I'm burning to death! You know how much an apartment that big would cost on the sun?

Fry · Professor · Amy · Leela:We don't work for you anymore! - What? - Dwight and Cubert made us an offer. - We're paperboys now.

Amy:Don't you sweet-talk me... you wrinkly old tube sock.

Amy:Now, you should be happy that they became successes... instead of following in your food stamps.

Amy:Happy Freedom Day! Oh, I think my wrist is broken.

Amy:Mm. That'll feel nice on my shattered bones.

Leela · Amy:This can't go on. Today is the day we fight back! It's already 10:00. Oh, you're right. Tomorrow is the day we fight back.

Amy:Schman! The great rad spot is mega-Sweet for party boarding.

Amy:Kif, don't cry, or you'll get a tummy ache.

Amy · Professor:You could drop me off on the way. We could, but we won't!

Amy:They jumped right out of their pants.

Kif · Amy:Imagine you stowing away and stealing a licensed starship. Oh, it's so romantic it gives me the shivers.

Amy:Well, okay. But that better be all there is.

Mrs. Wong · Amy:We had your old party board converted now that you not be partying anymore. You trashed my party board? Damn right. Now you a mom.

Amy:Both.

Amy:It's this season's shark-Cartilage enema!

Fry · Amy · Hermes:It wasn't me, Mr. F. It was Amy. / Stop it, Amy! You stink! / You know you did it!

Amy · Leela:But your parents are gross sewer mutants. Ow!

Amy:I'm no doctor, but this machine guy could use a lozenge.

Amy:Look how high the asteroid belt is pulled up on that planet!

Amy:What this? This is the same toy surprising at last time!

Professor · Amy:Now, bees communicate by dancing. Like my parents! Wait! That was hitting!

Amy:He looks so natural. It's funny to think he's crammed full of sawdust and preservatives.

Amy:Hey! What if Fry wasn't actually dead when we buried him? You know, like Julia Roberts.

Amy · LaBarbara:Quit your bragging, my boyfriend's alive too. Not anymore.

Amy · Zoidberg:Were you just singing? No. I was telling you not to worry. I'm not allowed to sing. Court order.

Amy:And he talked non-stop, like a parrot of the sea he was.

Amy:Whatever's in there, it's the only thing I've ever wanted.

Amy · Bender:Tangled-up Christmas lights! We can take shifts untangling them! / And unlabeled booze! Wide-mouth too!

Amy · Tattoo:I almost feel kind of shallow for blowing my rebate on this cool talking tattoo. Hey, Gordon Gekko. I cost as much as this whole crummy date!

Professor · Amy:Well, yes. In the same way an infant may fight Muhammad Ali, but-- One pound of stem cells, please!

Tattoo · Amy:Oh! Somebody won big at Skee-Ball! You shut up!

Professor · Amy:You, wrinkled as a prune. You, fat as the queen of sea cows. I love you!

Amy:Who smells like freaking porpoise hork? I do!

Amy:I can't watch this 'cause it's creepy and wrong and sick. However, I will watch out of curiosity.

Amy:Maybe a parcheesi tournament.

Bender · Amy:Is there an app for kissing my shiny metal ass? Several!

Amy:It's that obscure underground song that's constantly playing everywhere.

Amy:But don't takey word for it. Unbiased-reviews-dot-mom says

Fry · Amy:You have 50,000 followers? I only have three. Send. / I unsubscribed yesterday.

Amy:Oh, the news is so violent. Let's watch Rachael Ray instead. Oh, no, wait, there might be chopping.

Kif · Amy:God, what a wuss. Stop being such a spineless jellyfish. You know full well I am more closely related to the sea cucumber.

Amy · Kif:Not where it counts. (Whimpers)

Amy · Todd (calendar):Leave Todd out of this. Thanks, babe. Also, today is Canadian Independence Day. (Plays wolf-whistle)

Amy:Oop, that's Bender's ringtone. I recognize the smell.

Robber · Amy:Nobody move or sweet cheeks here gets it. (Giggles) Ooh, you're bad.

Amy:No, technically we were fon-fon-rus, so we weren't really married.

Amy:Remember, love between a human and a robot is taboo.

Fry · Amy:I think I'm coming down with circus-itis. (Sneezes, clown horn honks) I thought circus-itis only affected children. Children of all ages.

Amy:Aw, you always say just the wrong thing in just the right way.

Amy · Professor:What about on the roof? Get your mind out of the gutter. What about in the gutter?

Inez Wong · Amy · Wine Bot:Stop seducing him, you hussy! I'm attracted to Bender, not this emotionless wine bucket! Hopes... deleted.

Jamaican Man · Amy:(Jamaican accent): Yah, mon! You got to legalize it! We're talking about robosexual marriage. We're talking about lots of stuff.

Amy:even ghost and horse

Amy:(girlish squeal) Was he nice? How did his hair smell?

Amy:We had to answer every question in the form of an opera.

Amy:I have a lot of homework for tomorrow, if I don't want to be... ♪ embarrassed. ♪

Hermes · Amy:Shall we review alphabetical order? ♪ A-B-C-D... ♪

Amy:♪ A-B-C-D... ♪ Well, this requires a little extra thought.

Amy:I'm a natural.

Amy:and Zoidberg's getting overcooked!

Amy · Leela:♪ What day is today? ♪ ♪ It's Leela's birthday ♪ Please stop. ♪ What a day for a birthday ♪ I really would like you to stop singing. ♪ Let's all have some cake! ♪

Amy · Leela:You want to buy a slice of birthday cake for $11.95? Yes, please.

Amy:It's what he'd want.

Amy:Move it, boy toy. Granny's taking you to Atlantic City.

Amy:Whoa! The magma P.I. is 10,000 degrees Selleck.

Farnsworth · Amy:You've been my grad student for 12 years. You were ready six years ago. What?! I probably should have told you.

Bender · Amy:Still a little nervous? (burps) She's a nervous wreck!

Fry · Amy · Bender:Your place or mine? Both. But first, this place. Room for one more?

Amy:Well, yes, but that's not 'revelant.'

Amy:Yes, tapping the earth's ener-kerchoo.

Amy · Professor Katz:Professor Katz, would you mind...? Miss Wong, I mind everything.

Bender · Amy:Where do you think you're going, No-cat? Uh, the basement. I think I left the air-hockey table on.

Amy:He's one of those dog-operated puppets that's been adapted for use by a cat!

Amy:So I had my doctorate denied by that fuzz ball?!

Nibbler · Amy:Say, do you know Obliteron? He pretends to be a hamster, but... Yeah, that's really great. Could you please tell us what's going on?!

Amy:If you're propositioning me, I'm not interested.

Amy:The Earth h h is coming to a st!

Amy · Farnsworth:Yes... the wrong direction! So?

Amy · Farnsworth:How's the job market? Ruff.

Amy · Professor Farnsworth:I found a missing link. It seems to be half man, half toucan. Not what we're looking for. Throw it in the soup!

Hermes · Amy:Uh-oh. It's another one of Fry's dogs. You find something, Hermes? Uh... no.

Amy · Professor Farnsworth:Oh, darn it! I broke off one of my of fingers! Look, Cubert. The neck on this one. I bet he spent a fortune on ties!

Professor Farnsworth · Amy:What, too soon? I highly doubt a Jurassic elaphrosaurid had access to neckwear.

Leela · Amy:I think they want wives, so just play along. If it doesn't work out, we'll still get half their rocks. I can earn my own rocks. Also, I don't want any rocks.

Amy:I'm going to miss Spencer.

Amy:Good, I'm sick of cleaning up those heaps of dead monkeys.

Amy · Professor:Like the heaps of dead monkeys? / Science cannot move forward without heaps.

Amy · Professor · Amy:I wasted my youth porking out. / Yes, I remember. / Would you please take that down? It's making me hungry.

Amy · Professor:It didn't work, you doddering old... / Ah, cartilage.

Amy:I hate paying $14 to see Nicolas cage solve things.

Amy · Amy:But then Nicolas cage discovered The real treasure was his family. / Yes, I'll hold.

Amy:Every nerd's fantasy, baby.

Amy · Fry:Pfft! That's just a fake holiday you make up every year to get out of work. / Yeah! If it's real, how come there's no song that explains how to celebrate it?

Amy:We brought a chocolate cake, but now I'm worried that might be offensive in some way.

Amy:We should become a commercial airline. I mean, we've got a ship, and teleporters won't be invented for another 15 years, according to that guy from the future.

Amy · Professor:Girls of planet express calendar. Girlie calendar? Great idea, Amy.

Bender · Amy:Stop actually washing and play with the sponges. But the ship is dirty. Eh, whatever. I ran out of film an hour ago.

Professor · Amy:Fortunately, I came up with a brilliant idea to save Planet Express. We'll turn it into a commercial airline. But that was my idea. Then you should have talked louder.

Amy · child passenger · Amy:Captain, we were supposed to land two days ago. Is everything... hey! Are we at the fair yet, mommy? We're not at the any place. And we're out of fuel.

Amy:Attention, passengers. Please remain seated until the plane comes to a complete crash.

Amy:Flight attendant's log: We've crash near a river of mercury on a lifeless mineral world. Supplies are low, cannibalism imminent, radio busted.

Amy · others:Oh, look! A clearance sale! What?! Where?

Fry · Amy:So if one's got any good fart jokes, now would be the time. It's a shmundred degrees, and all we have to drink are non-diet sodas.

Amy · others:It, I forgot that amana here is a refrigerator. If we could supercharge her freon with a gas compressor, we might survive the heat and make to the cave. Hey, yeah! But the only gas compressor on this planet is inside bender's ass.

Amy:Was that a fart joke? Because I don't find those amusing. No one does.

Bender · Amy · Zoidberg · Fry · Alien:My wingwang's gone! My girls! My antennae! My kajigger! My gonopores!

Amy:Like the Kardashians.

Amy:Oh, no! It's within munching distance of the Doritos float!

Amy:Yeah. Last time you went to the suicide booth, you ended up dating it for six months.

Amy:How is Lynn, by the way?

Amy · Leela:We're being eaten by a giant spider! There's no time for that! The Professor needs us!

Amy:Aw, he's so cute. Wait. No, he isn't.

Amy:Ugh! In public?

Amy · Bender:I think it means... 'The sun will erupt... all shall perish,' blah-blah-blah. Get to the point! What does it say about me, Bender?

Amy:Stop the end-of-the-world sex. We might survive after all.

Amy · Bender:That underground pyramid isn't a pyramid... it's a rocket ship! It was worth waiting five hours to hear you finish that sentence.

choose-matron · Amy · unknown_scientist:Female, scientist. We were in the same sorority. Accepted! - Sigma Beta, see you latah! - Sigma Beta, see you latah!

Leo Wong · Amy:Admission, $20. - Dad! Gleesh.

Amy:Hey, Ancient Martian's a very hard language. A........ looks just like a .........

Amy · Fry:Wait! Help! I'm still on Mars, and I can't jump! Hang on, Leela! I'll save you again! Or somebody else could do it!

Amy:I'll stick with the evil maniac I know, thank you

Amy · Hermes:These pictures are just as good as the ones in my celebrity tabloid. Us people magazine?

Amy:Whoof! I beg to differ.

Amy:That ego must be at least four feet tall by now.

Amy:Oh, God, just kill us already!

Amy:There'll be 'chicken or fish, circle one.'

Amy · Leela:Ooh, I love your boots, Leela. Nobody would ever guess they're knockoffs. How could you tell? I guessed.

Amy · Leela:'Bam!' followed by compliment about knockoff boots

Amy:Judging from your tank top, you love getting hooted at by hillbillies.

Amy:Why don't you and I ever do things together?

Amy:This is hard. Now I know why butterflies are always so grouchy.

Amy:Even that team that turned out to be us in the mirror.

Amy:Cork your face bladder. I'm working!

Amy:Oh, your son's going to die all right... But from neglect. 'Cause you're going home in an urn. A funerary urn.

Amy:What's he gonna do, migrate at us?

Professor · Amy:'I'm not surprised. Those pheromones were highly concentrated.' 'Oh, I think I'm getting a little... caterpilly.'

Amy:'That is some freaky bug-on-bug action. I feel a little left out.'

Amy:Uh, yes, sir, I will be sure to snore that science lamp right away.

Amy:I can only see one of his four mouth-tendrils moving.

Amy:Does anyone else find it freaky that Zoidberg is singing harmony with himself?

Amy:Even with harps, that's still the famous Oktoberfest chicken dance!

Amy:Oh, my God! That looks like Fry's hair!

Amy:It's tragedy on a bun.

Amy · Bender:a homeless rodeo clown named Floyd came to the door claiming he was... Bender! Why do you always have to be the center of attention?

Amy · Wong:Well, they do work for minimum wage in a land that was once theirs. Yeah, but they never made wise use of the land.

Amy:Pfft. Pathetic.

Amy · Zoidberg:Zoidberg, what are you doing?! I don't know. I think it's called roulette.

Amy:Oh, my God! Amy's mirror got a tattoo!

Amy:What's rent?

Amy · Professor:Um, how come we've never been in this room before? I think this chart will answer that.

Amy:Mutants? That's the kind of thing you are.

Leela · Amy:Ooh! Shut up.

Amy:It's jewelry... jewelry. It's jewelry, people!

Amy:I promised myself I wouldn't pose naked until I was married.

Fry · Amy:Sorry, ma'am, I'll have to confiscate your artificial kneecap. Okay, here you go.

Amy · Leela:A clearance sale! What? Where?

Amy · LaBarbara · Leela:It wasn't Tommy Hilfijigger. It was Linens 'n Things! The hell it was. It was a Juicy Couture.

Amy:Wait, I forgot that Amana here is a refrigerator.

Amy:These bad boys are hard to aim.

Leela · Amy:A rat! Yes, she is a rat. No, look!

Zoidberg · Amy:You want to see a picture of my boy? Sure. That's your penis. That's my boy.

Amy · Leela:Hey, look, a fog is rolling in. No, that's just the Jamaican Pride float.

Amy:Bender, you always say you're going to kill yourself, but you almost never do.

Professor · Amy:I said science! Let the seance begin.

Amy:Mm. I do love a man in uniform. Ahem! I mean a uniform that doesn't involve short pants.

Amy:Look at you. Hubba hubba. Your pants go almost all the way to your ankles.

Amy:Wow. Bender is really committed to his new Jethrovian identity.

Amy:Zoidberg had friends?

Amy:Why did we have to come here at night?

Amy:Smeesh! He gonked off the engines.

Amy:I spent a semester in Africa harpooning giraffes. And giraffes are basically just land space whales.

Amy:Oh, God, I'm having a Serengeti flashback. Die, you dirty giraffe!

Amy:A lot of Bender fell out of the crow's nest.

Amy:Wow. Are you gross looking.

Amy · Fast food worker:Buggalo tots? What exactly are those made out of? You got a warrant?

Amy · Farmer:That's the kind of sap I like. You the kind of sap I like. I'm scare-roused.

Amy · Egg farmer:I'll bet you run your own hatchery, just you and your wife... Matilda. No, ma'am. Matilda and I gather them eggs in the forest. And Matilda's really more of a mongoose than a wife.

Amy · Egg farmer:You're a lucky man. But are they way more expensive than regular eggs? Way more. Ooh! I'll take a dozen.

Amy · Fry:Kill it before someone names it! No! Mr. Peppy just wants to be our friend.

Amy:That's what we said about Zoidberg, and look where that got us.

Amy · Professor · Amy:How big does one of those things get? Well, that depends on what one of those things is. That seems like a fact worth knowing.

Amy:And I can't even find my own uterus.

Amy:Also, the salad's ready.

Amy:My God, he's like some kind of believable Hulk.

Amy:I'm wearing a belly parka.

Amy:I'm just glad I have my wool scarf. What good is a wool...?

Amy:If we could mount one big musical featuring everyone's talents, we might just save Planet Express! We'll call it Nibbler on the Roof!

Amy · Bender:Oh, we've had some tough times, but at least we won a Tony. You won a Tony. Feh.

Amy:Dear Liza.

Amy · Professor:Pfft, those things don't rhyme. / Things only rhyme below ten to the minus five angstroms, you dope.

Amy · Bender:I checked the invariance of your Lagrangian. / Hubba hubba.

Amy · Zoidberg:You may be gelatinous, but not even the Mochi Phantom could perform such intricate motions! / Says you, salaryman.

Amy:Whoa, whoa, there, girl. Go on now! Get on back to Paraguay!

Amy:Ugh! In public?

Amy · Bender:I think it means, 'The sun will erupt, all shall perish,' blah-blah-blah. Get to the point! What does it say about me, Bender?

Choose-matron · Amy:Female, scientist. We were in the same sorority. Accepted! Sigma Beta, see you later! Sigma Beta, see you later!

Leo Wong · Amy · Nixon:Admission, $20. Dad! Gleesh. Greetings, Mars men. We come to your planet to construct a gleaming city, a second Earth on which to begin anew. Okay. Admission, $20.

Amy:Hey, Ancient Martian's a very hard language. A... looks just like a...

Nixon · Amy:To the spaceship! There is no spaceship. You had it dismantled to build that statue. To the statue.

Guest · Amy:Nobody invited the help. Nobody invited me to kick your ass either, yet here we are. Hi-ya!

Fry · Leela · Amy · Bender:I have the best life ever. That's our Fry. It sure is. It most definitely is.

Leela · Amy:Is that him? Maybe?

Amy · Leela · Amy:Ooh! I'd watch that. It's a book. You'd read it. No, I wouldn't.

Amy:So weird that reading used to be a thing.

Leela · Amy · Bender:What's-his-name! He had a name? Even I looked down on him.

Frank · Leela · Amy:I thought you'd forgotten about me. No. We could never forget... Frank! Of course! Sounds right.

Frank · Amy:Books! Book sandwiches, book soup, scrambled books with fly larvae! Ew, books!

Professor · Leela · Amy · Zoidberg:While during the same period, we're using twice as much soap in the men's room. I have noticed less body odor. Definitely. Way less.

Amy · Professor:How much radiation? Not much. Like having an affair with Marie Curie.

Amy · Leela:Hey, why is the ship sideways? Who knows? It just falls over sometimes.

Amy:Film? Who uses film? We've had digital cameras for a thousand years.

Amy · Leela:Ooh, I love your boots, Leela. Nobody would ever guess they're knockoffs. How could you tell? I guessed.

Amy:Judging from your tank top, you love getting hooted at by hillbillies. And you could use the $50 for another gallon of Hello Kitty perfume.

Amy:Even that team that turned out to be us in the mirror.

Amy:Whoa, that puts the lead in my pencil. Thanks, trainer.

Amy:Mmm! A guy could get used to this.

Amy:Cork your face bladder. I'm working!

Leela · Amy:But from neglect. 'Cause you're going home in an urn. A funerary urn.

Amy:You smell kind of nice.

Amy:Oh, I think I'm getting a little caterpilly.

Amy:I don't give a crap!

Amy:He's even more beautiful than before!

Amy:Yes, sir, I will be sure to snore that science lamp right away.

Amy:I don't want to end up a cold, emotionless machine like you.

Amy:That's sweet, Hermes.

Amy:I can only see one of his four mouth tendrils moving.

Amy:Does anyone else find it freaky that Zoidberg is singing harmony with himself?

Amy:Oh! I like your nerd glasses. Are you a college student? A college student? Because if you are, I'd like to invite you to a hot sorority party tonight.

Fry · Amy:Yes, I'd like to enroll in college. You're still talking to me. Oops.

Amy:it seemed like the single crummiest, laziest, most awful, dimwitted idea in the entire history of science fiction, but it turned out to be true. Who knew?

Amy:Good work, writer of The Matrix.

Amy:Earth's boring. I'll save us. Let's go visit my parents at their fabulous casino in Mars Vegas.

Amy:Oh, my God! Amy's mirror got a tattoo!

Mrs. Wong · Amy:Who do you think been paying your rent? What's rent?

Fry · Amy:Um, how come we've never been in this room before? I think this chart will answer that.

Zoidberg · Amy:Sorry, I'm just so hungry. Don't spoil your appetite. You need to eat 300 pounds of cash salad.

Amy · Zoidberg:Everybody say 'fresh shrimp!' Oh... that was a rough ride.

Amy:Keep going. We're almost outside! Zoidberg, try to just burp up singles.

Amy:There was a bear.

Amy:It's so cute. Horseshoe crab cute.

Amy:Not Penelope.

Amy:Let's all 10 of us go together. There's safety in numbers.

Amy:Five out of 10, also nice.

Amy:Also Pisces. We're all Pisces.

Amy · Professor:Stupid body! Why won't you go to that other stream? Nobody knows! I just told you!

Zoidberg · Amy:Should we be watching this? It seems kind of personal. That's not an issue for us. We're wildlife.

Zoidberg · Amy:Is it weird if I talk about his crazy turtle penis? No.

Hermes · Amy:No, no. I choose to believe they're alive in some other dimension. Screaming in agony. / I hope so.

Professor · Amy:Amy, what are you? Human. Damn!

Professor · Amy:Do you have a marmoset costume? No. Just these marmoset pajamas. They'll have to do.

Monkey · Amy:Humans experimented on us, chained us to organ-grinders, made us ride around in ridiculous tiny vehicles. You're still riding around in ridiculous tiny vehicles. By choice.

Amy:Ew, gross! I'm gonna use the tongs.

Bender · Amy:Oh, your God! Fry and Leela are in a zoo! Shh! Oh, sorry.

Leela · Fry · Zoidberg · Bender · Amy:Zoidberg and his awful stench. Stanky. Bender and his obnoxious ego. But-but... And what about Amy? Always prancing around in those stupid marmoset pajamas.

Amy:Even if my stupid marmoset pajamas offend Leela's big fat eye.

Amy:Prairie elephant! Adorable prairie elephant!

Amy:Oh, my god, reality is infringing bender's copyright.

Amy:But you said making a copy of yourself Would be a lousy ending.

Amy · Leela:The locations form a perfect shape of some kind. No! Bender was at every one of those places right before the fire started.

Amy:Praise Gilgamesh!

Amy · Leela:Did anyone else hear that weird laugh? It's spooky. It doesn't seem to correspond to anything funny happening.

Amy · George Takei:But Kabuki theaters don't have a projector. Some do.

Amy:In the name of satan. Rise from the dead

Leela · Bender · Amy:Does anyone else find this delivery suspicious? Nope. He's too dumb, and I don't care. Well, I'm smart, and I care too much.

Leela · Amy:Why isn't there a lighthouse to guide us away from the rocks? I don't know, But look out for that lighthouse!

Tarquin · Amy:Found me a whole blue man group once. So you have two jobs? More. I also salvage the wrecks with my bathysphere, And I'm a butcher, If you like blue meat.

Amy:Why don't they just use a thoughtspike like normal people?

Bender · Amy · Bender:Isn't it obvious? ... Uh, no. ... Drat, I was hoping it was.

Amy:We gather here every day.

Amy:That's the most uncomfortable sleeping bag I ever slept in.

Amy:What did the violence solve?

Amy:That's not an excuse. It's just an explanation of what happened.

Amy:I hope you're happy!

Amy:Oh, it's just a chinchilla. What a cute little... (screeches)

Amy:Unless you posted it on facebook. Like the last secret I told you.

Amy:Lots of people wear a jockstrap thinking it's a thong.

Amy:Yay, lamey!

Amy · Hermes:Ew! Hit it with a stick!

Zoidberg · Amy:We had a wonderful night of love-making in my dumpster. Ew!

Amy:She'll be forever grateful from somewhere upwind.

Amy:My boyfriend gave me a diamond

Amy:We call it the present, but spluttever

Amy:Kif has a single friend. His name is Zapp.

Amy:He's streaming at double speed? Why not just slow it down?

Amy · Leela:Aw. He's using his jacket as some kind of security blanket. That's so cute and pathetic.

Amy:Shmeird. There's some old alert I set up 20 years ago. Our babies?!

Amy · Character · Bender:I have video of the birth. Wanna see it? No! That is the wrong kind of delivery!

Bender · Amy:Life is disgusting. / No, it was beautiful. But I was so not prepared to be a mother.

Bender · Amy:Then can I have your car? No! Too late. I already crashed it.

Grand Midwife · Amy:and not for any optional cash donation people sometimes place in that basket. It's green, and there's a little sign on it. Found it!

Kif · Amy:Oh my. I'm so anxious, my camouflage reflex is kicking in. / No, it's helpful. I wanna look cute for our hundreds of kids.

Amy · Grand Midwife:What's that mean? / It means don't start naming them yet.

Amy · Leela:They're nice, you know? Just a kinda little... Super gross.

Newt · Amy · Character · Amy:Mama! Wrong again. / He's shrively! You haven't seen the half of it.

Leela · Amy · Bender:Seriously? Oh, my God. I must have been super drunk. / Leela, you bone brain! You didn't have sex. Bone.

Amy · Bender:And it's filthy. / Oh, yeah! Educate me, baby.

Amy:Look at me, chugging mineral water on a weeknight! So wild and free!

Amy:Are you done spoiling my kids rotten so they'll love you more?

Amy:Well, you can trot back to the barn now!

Fry · Professor · Amy:Um, is this thallium? Oh my, yes! High-grade ore! Um, Professor? Toxic. Relax. They're my prospecting teeth.

Bender · Amy:Fifteen! I always wanted to own a racehorse. That's a donkey, Bender. Donkeys are just ugly horses, Amy.

Amy:That's actually a pretty reasonable use case for robot heads.

Professor · Amy:You must shrink down and battle the worms... face-to-face! Really? That sounds gross. Oh my, yes. And dangerous. Oh my, yes!

Amy · Professor:At least it's dead simple. That's where you're wrong!

Amy · Professor:And this track? Track? Oh, right! It came with the set.

Bender · Amy:Amy, shove it! No! You shove it! Oh. You mean this thing.

Amy:Orange sparklies? Zoidberg's going to bedazzle his lungs!

Beetle shaman · Amy:Make a right at the large sand mound, then a left at the medium-sized mound. After the fifth mound, you'll see a mound. So many mounds!

Fry · Bender · Amy:A tasty wienerschnitzel? A funny monkey? Sandstorm!

Amy:That's too many levels! We've gotta kill those mites!

Amy:I mean, they met him before, but he didn't make much of an impression.

Amy · Bender:Bender, since when do you have three legs? - Uh, uh, th-this one's a spare. In case I break down on the highway.

Amy · Professor Farnsworth:Professor, you're a teddy bear! I assure you I am not. Aw...

Amy:Can you pause it? I'm getting a call.

Professor · Amy:New evidence was presented and I changed my mind. I'm a scientist, not a... - Idiot? - Politician.

Amy:She was my aunt!

Amy · Professor:We know! Stop telling us! I didn't even have to go.

Amy:Aw, they're so cute! Now I care about them!

Amy:Oh, my glorsh!

Amy · Mom:This isn't kid's stuff, Mom! We're making NFTs.

Amy:Hardly. Though, in this case, yes.

Amy:Meesh, Mom! No one wants the original!

Amy:They look kinda cool, yet also extremely stupid.

Amy · Leela:You know, he might be just stupid enough. - Might be.

Amy · Bender:You're not gonna believe this. You just made 90... - Million? - Four... - Thousand? - Dollars! - Cents?

Amy · Leela:Does it look like we're in a stupid TV show? - Kind of.

Amy · Bender:Mexxxico, with three Xs. - Got it. Adios, carnitas bags.

Amy · Bender:Um, actually... - What?! - Why is it still here? - I hate this place!

Amy · Frank · Hermes · Leela:How are you so energetic? Oh, I'll never get tired of this job. I have the best life ever. That's our Fry. It sure is. It most definitely is.

Amy:Pfft. That's ridiculous. Um...

Amy:Ew, I got book on me! It's so weird that reading used to be a thing.

Amy · Frank · Amy:What did you eat? Books. Book sandwiches, book soup, scrambled books with fly larvae. Ew, books!

Professor · Amy · Leela:While during this same period, we're using twice as much soap in the men's room. I have noticed less body odor. Definitely. Way less.

Amy · Fry · Bender:He didn't have a name, poor guy. Frank. His name was Frank. Right. Whatever happened to him? Like I care. I don't.

Amy · Character 2:I don't get why you brush your buggalo. They have no hair. - Shh. They don't know that. - Don't know what?

Leela · Amy:No, I'm not. - This is Beyond Buggalo. - Yuck. What's it made from, plant? No. Pork. I never did like pigs.

Amy:I never did like pigs.

Amy · Bender:Guilt? - Maybe. I always wondered what guilt felt like.

Amy · Food Worker:I'll have the prime rib, seared scallops, asparagus with hollandaise sauce, and two dozen cream puffs. / Here's your bologna sandwich.

Hermes · Amy:Oh, no, wait. Those are only $5.98 a minute. / There were some of those too, and you weren't even here!

Amy · Bender:How embarrassing! / For Chelsea!

Amy:Maybe we can look stupid together? Doy!

Hedonismbot · Amy:Clothing optional. / Optional? Then I guess I'll wear some.

Amy:We get it! You're a dirty old couch.

Amy:I was expecting Of Mice and Men to be about a man-mouse hybrid.

Amy · Professor:That is an amazing invention. This isn't the invention, you boob.

Amy · Professor:Wow. Is that a flatlock seam? Why, thank you for noticing, Amy. It looks elegant and minimizes blood loss.

Amy · Professor:Um, Professor? Most people have a head. Sure. The in-crowd.

Amy:Ugh. Okay, but remember: Their eyes are up here.

Amy:That's Cara Delevingne. She invented eyebrows.

Amy:I've never told anyone this, but it's been my lifelong dream to be a famous scientist.

Amy:I've never told anyone this, but it's been my lifelong dream to be a famous scientist.

Amy:Meaning a half-caf, teeny-weeny-mocha-cheenie with a plop-top of froth foam and do not even think of whipping that dollop.

Amy:Because you look like a dollop-whipper.

Amy:I don't get why my kids are so spoiled. We have tons of money, we give them everything they want, and still totally spoiled!

Amy:Hey, does the Orphanarium allow visitors? You know, so people can feel good about themselves, and also frighten their own children?

Amy:I apologize, kids. That was just horrible! I'll buy you all ponies to make up for it.

Amy · Mandy:Mandy! Stop kissing garbage! / But, we're having fun!

Amy · Store Employee:People collect these things? / Oh God, yes. From the moment I nabbed my first one, I was like... ♪ Gotta collect 'em all! ♪

Amy · Store Employee:There! I collected 'em all. / Oh, honey, that's not even close to 'em all. You've got, like, 195 to go.

Professor · Amy:Our desire to obtain them is beyond our control. / I don't know if it's literally beyond our-- / A CuddleFish is up for auction!

Amy:Just sneak in and pretend to be orphans till I get back! Go, go, go!

Amy · Auctioneer:All the money in my children's college funds! / Madam, that bid is more than makes any sense.

Amy:Maybe they don't exist! Maybe it's all just some kinda sick, fuzzy-wuzzy game!

Amy · Sally:That one is so dirty. Wouldn't you rather have some nice clean ones? / No, I like my dirty one better. It matches me.

Professor · Leela · Amy:My God! What? What's in there? / Little plastic beads! Or beans! / What did you expect? It's a beanbag.

Professor · Amy · Bender:Whoa, this is no bean. It's alive! / Aren't beans alive? / Cork it, nerd!

Amy:♪ I got it, I got it! The rarest in the world! By ripping off a little orphan girl! ♪ / I'm a terrible person.

Professor · Amy:This is an invasion where we're buying the invaders and bringing them into our homes! / Like my black mold Chia Pet?

Amy:Nobody gets to hug Kif to death but me!

Amy:Wrong! Because to a mother, the cutest thing in the universe is her own child.

Professor · Amy:The Alpha Funbag is dead? How on earth did you do it?! / Cute recognize cute.

Amy:They may be lousy toys, but they're a great investment. / And I collected 'em all!

Amy · Professor:Are you alright? No, I'm not alright! I was talking to the can opener.

Amy · Professor:I'd hate to be here at night. It is night. Then I hate being here!

Amy:Sometimes, I think I can control the weather. [giggles]

Amy:Dang! That's the tallest short guy I've ever seen.

Magazine headline · Amy:Hot plus tall equals sexy? Well, you can't argue with the math.

Amy:And also, isn't it pronounced Calabasas?

Amy · Leela:Wait... wasn't Bender the bad guy? Oh, loosen up, Amy.

Amy:Sorry I'm late. It took forever to take off all my clothes.

Amy:Sun's out, buns out.

Amy:It's heartbreaking, like a summer sidewalk popsicle.

Amy · Bender:I could just eat them up. Hey, I was using that.

Amy:I'm from Mars. Whatever.

Amy:It appears groovy, yet volatile.

Amy:I know Kif and I are soulmates, so this is gonna be fun. Right, Kiffy?

Amy · Kif:It's me! Oh thank the Grand Midwife's porous skin sack. It was always you.

Amy:Well, I got a really cute skirt on sale, and you've been in a coma for a month. It's plaid.

Amy:What's your secret? I'm bisexual. Oh, you mean the dessert!

Amy:They're exquisite! You really stayed in the lines.

Amy:What are you people talking about? Fry's paintings are crap. Ow! I mean, the foot pain makes me see how beautiful I'm saying they are.

Professor · Bender · Amy:I've completed the mystery machine! I'm blind! What does it do? Can it kill at least one human? Maybe.

Amy:These are really good. I mean, I'd hang that in my second-best mansion.

Amy · Fry:Maybe. But, just being included is the best prize of all. Wow, better than the one for winning?

Amy · Professor:Wait, how do you spell 'lavender'? / Only two Ls in 'smell.'

Professor · Amy · Professor:I'll have to clear my nose with a nasal laser, or 'Naser'. / I've never heard of a Naser. / That's because it doesn't exist. So one of us will have to invent it.

Amy · Professor · Amy:All the buttons are missing. / Strange... Who would eat nice, crunchy buttons? / Uh, just tie them with various lengths of wire.

Amy:It's a cultured yogurt drink we grew in a beaker. With bacteria!

Amy · Professor:We don't need the megaphone. / It's for me. I can barely hear myself.

Amy:You know my parents don't pay ransom.

Amy · Grand Midwife:Um, will you be using actual words at some point? / Nope, just spirit sounds.

Amy · Professor:You have to wonder, could the whole concept of ascending to Heaven have come from ancient people being caught by space fishermen? / Maybe. Or, it could be a miracle. It's impossible to say.

Amy · Professor:Is it possible all this has broadened your mind a little? / No.

Amy:File not found. I tried my best!

Bender · Amy · Leela:¿Quién es Bender? / Uh, I'm late for a gynecologist appointment! / Me too! Let's carpool.

Amy:Ooh, I hate her so much! That should have been me!

Amy:Ooh, I've never been frozen in that before.

Amy:It's hung up on the rim!

Amy:We're gonna need more cigarettes!

Amy:That is one dead hero.