A Flight To Remember

Fry:Never go to a planet called 'Cannibalon.' That's right. Food was good, though.

Professor · Leela · Professor:Great news, everyone- / Shove it! We quit! / Then I'll have to hire a new crew to go on our company vacation.

Fry:Great! I haven't had time off since I was 21 through 24.

Professor · Amy:It's my way of thanking you for not reporting my countless violations... of safety and minimum-wage laws. / Aw, you!

Professor:I've booked us on the maiden voyage of the largest... most luxurious space cruise ship ever built. The Titanic!

Fry:Looks nice.

Mayor:A man who single-handedly defeated the Retiree People... of the Assisted Living Nebula: Zapp Brannigan!

Leela · Fry · Leela:God, not Zapp Brannigan! / You know Zapp Brannigan? / Let's just say we've crossed paths.

Amy:Before or after you slept with him?

Zapp:She's a beautiful ship. Shapely, seductive. I'm gonna fly her brains out.

Zapp:And now, without further adieu... I christen this ship Titanic.

Crowd:Ooh!

Zapp · Kif:Well, well, well! The Lady Leela. Take notes, Kif. You're about to witness the subtle waltz known as seduction.

Zapp:So! Trapped on a ship with me. What say you and I knock some very sensual boots?

Leela:It's tempting, but I have a fiancé now.

Fry · Fry:Huh? Ooh! / How do you do?

Fry:At least we get a window.

Bender:I'm tired of this room and everyone in it. Excuse me. I'm gonna pop over to the casino for the next 135 hours.

Zoidberg · Amy:I think I'll go fill up on bisque at the buffet. / That just leaves you and your fake fiancé... all alone on a romantic cruise.

Bender:I'm betting it all! Come on! Baby needs a new pair of feet!

Dealer · Bender:Snake eyes. / My cheating unit malfunctioned! You gotta give me a do-over.

Dealer:Sorry, the house limit is three do-overs. Next shooter.

Bender:I assure you, I barely know the meaning of the word 'labor.'

Zapp · Kif:Kif, I'm feeling the captain's itch. / I'll get the powder.

Zapp:The itch for adventure. Let's change course.

Zapp:That's for schoolgirls. Here's a route with chest hair.

Zapp:Yes, comets. The icebergs of the sky.

Zapp:It's time to shove a jalapeno up this ship's tailpipe.

Amy's Mom:We were enjoying a relaxing vacation. Since you're here, we must meddle.

Amy's Mom · Amy's Dad:We met a nice boy in the next cabin. / He's not very ugly.

Amy's Mom:You should marry him. Or use him to conceive a grandchild for us.

Amy's Dad:Where is he? And why isn't he here right now, fathering our grandchild?

Fry:It's romantic- I mean, platonic. That sure is one platonic view.

Leela · Fry:I'm beginning to think this whole fake fiancé thing was a terrible- / Hm? Mmm.

Zapp:Perhaps this is an awkward time.

Fry:Well, you got anything else for him?

Leela:I consider my fake relationship with you more meaningful.

Countess:Either that was a computing error or you're the most romantic robot ever.

Bender:The bracelet had a diamond the size of a raccoon's brain. Why couldn't I steal it?

iZac:It's obvious. You're in love.

Bender:She, a countess built with a silver spoon in her mouth... and me, just a regular honest Joe.

Bartender · Bender:You gonna pay for those? / Hell, no.

Hermes:Don't be a dog heart, woman. You know I can't. Not after what happened.

Hermes · Kid · Hermes:No, boy, stop! It's too low! Your backbone can't take it! / I'm just like Hermes! I'm just like- / No!

Hermes · LaBarbara:Though it did get me some action. / I like a man who's flexible.

Zapp:No matter. I know from personal experience how horizontal you can get.

Bender:I'm a fraud. A poor, lazy, sexy fraud.

Bender:This isn't even a real bow tie. It's magnetic.

Countess:I love your artificial intelligence and sincerity simulator.

Zapp:Not much younger. Perhaps even a couple years older.

Zapp:I'll be all over Leela like a fly on a pile of very seductive manure.

Fry:I learned how to handle delicate situations... from a show called Three's Company.

Fry:Come and knock on our door

Fry:Mr. Roper....

Zapp:Come back when it's a catastrophe.

Zapp:I don't know which disgusts me more, your cowardice or stupidity.

Zapp:We'll set a new course for that region... near that black-ish hole-ish thing.

Leela:Are you sure? I mean, she has two eyes. You have two eyes.

Fry:Talk about a mood killer.

Leela · Zapp:That's surprisingly noble of you. / No, it's noble of you.

Bender:Don't tell the others. If I don't return, say I died robbing some old man.

Fry:I'll say you died prying the ring off his dead finger.

Countess:No, luckily a family broke my fall.

Bender:And I'd do it again! And perhaps a third time! But that would be it.

Bender:When we kiss, I feel like I'm standing waist-deep... in a pool of cold, rising water.

Hermes:This one is for that little kid limboing in heaven now.

Zapp:We needn't dress up like women and children.

Amy's Mom · Amy's Dad:More importantly, we found you a man. / A captain.

Countess:After all, it's shareware.

Bender:Tragic romances always have a happy ending.

Amy · Professor · Zoidberg:Don't cry. Nobody knows what happens in a black hole. It's possible she's alive in another dimension, right? / Oh, yes. Absolutely. / Not a chance.

Zoidberg:It's fake, man.