Fry

Fry:Space. It seems to go on and on forever... but then you get to the end... and a gorilla starts throwing barrels at you.

Fry:And that's how you play the game. You stink, loser.

Fry:Hello! Pizza delivery! For, uh... 'I.C. Wiener'? Oh, crud.

Fry:I always thought by this point in my life... I'd be the one making the crank calls.

Fry:Here's to another lousy millennium.

Fry:My parents. My coworkers. My girlfriend. I'll never see any of them again. Ya-hoo!

Fry:Cool. Just like in Star Trek.

Fry · Leela:Can I ask you a question? As long as it's not about my eye. Uh... is it about my eye? Sort of.

Fry · Leela:Cool. An alien. Has your race taken over the earth? No. I just work here.

Fry:My God. A million years.

Fry · Leela:That's great. What's the little guy's name? Professor Hubert Farnsworth. Ew.

Fry:Delivery boy? No! Not again. Please, anything else.

Leela · Fry:Then you'll be fired. Fine. Out of a cannon into the sun.

Fry · Bender:Whoa. A real-live robot. Or is that some kind of cheesy New Year's costume? Bite my shiny metal ass.

Fry · Bender:It doesn't look so shiny to me. Shinier than yours, meat bag.

Suicide booth · Fry:Please select mode of death: 'Quick and painless' or 'slow and horrible.' You have selected 'slow and horrible.'

Fry · Bender:Why would a robot need to drink? I don't need to drink. I can quit anytime I want.

Fry · Bender:Yeah, ever since I was six. Well, okay. But I don't want people thinking we're robosexuals...

Nimoy · Fry:Welcome to the Head Museum. I'm Leonard Nimoy. Spock? Hey, do the thing. I don't do that anymore.

Fry · Leela:Yeah, well if you're sorry then why are you doing it? It's my job. You gotta do what you gotta do.

Fry · Nixon's head:That's it. You just made my list. Stop it! Down boy! Bad president.

Fry · Police officer:Damn. You guys were totally out of control. That's our job. We're peace officers.

Fry · Bender:We can get out of here... if you just bend the bars. Dream on, skin tube.

Fry · Bender:If someone programmed you to jump off a bridge would you do it? I'll have to check my program. Yep.

Fry:That's what separates people and robots... from animals and animal robots.

Fry · Leela:You can't possibly understand... what it feels like to be so alone. I understand. I'm the only one-eyed alien on this whole planet.

Professor · Fry:I don't have an Uncle Fry. You do now. By God, I am your nephew.

Fry · Leela:Can anyone drive stick? I can... As long as I don't have to parallel park.

Fry:Are we going to fly through space... fighting monsters and teaching alien women to love?

Fry · Professor:So... I'm going to be a... delivery boy? Exactly. All right! I'm a delivery boy!

Farnsworth · Fry · Leela:I've paid to air it during Super Bowl. -Wow. -Not on the same channel, of course.

Fry · Farnsworth:-Are there really giant birds? -No, that was all special effects.

Fry:Caffeinated bacon. Baconated grapefruit. Admiral Crunch?

Fry · Hermes:'Death by airlock failure.' 'Death by brain parasite.' 'By sonic diarrhea.' -You don't want that.

Fry:I don't know about previous captains... but I intend to do as little dying as possible.

Fry · Zoidberg · Leela:I only have one. Really? -Is there a human doctor around?

Fry:The moon? The moon moon? Wow! I'll be a famous hero. Like Neil Armstrong and other guys no one's heard of!

Fry · Leela:Can I do the countdown? -Sure. Knock yourself out. -10, 9-- -Okay, we're here.

Fry:8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, blastoff.

Fry · Leela:Hurry! I want to see the moon! -Relax, it's open till 9.

Fry · Leela:That's one small step for Fry-- And one giant line for admission.

Fry · Person in line:Can I have cuts? No.

Fry:You won't believe it. There's an amusement park on the moon! It's the happiest place orbiting Earth.

Fry:My first space delivery. Greetings, Moon Man. We come in peace. I am Fry, from the planet Earth.

Moon resident · Fry:Wise guy. If I wasn't so lazy, I'd punch you in the stomach. -But you are lazy, right? -Oh, don't get me started.

Fry · Bender:I got you guys refrigerator magnets! Get it off! Get it off!

Fry · Bender:So you flip out and act like a crazy folk singer? Yes. I guess a robot would have to be crazy to want to be a folk singer.

Fry · Leela:Wow! I never realized the first astronauts were so fat. That's no astronaut. It's a TV comedian. He used space travel as a metaphor for beating his wife.

Fry · Bender:-Leela's gonna kill me. -No, she'll probably make me do it.

Fry · Bender:Could you get those keys out for me? What do I look like, a guy who's not lazy?

Fry · Guide:That's not how it happened. I don't see you with a fun-gineering degree.

Fry:We're gonna die! It's every man for himself! Help me, Leela!

Fry:I know how to make love. Oh!

Fry · Moon farmer · Robot daughters:Robot daughters? -This here is Lulabelle Seven. -Yoo-hoo! -Daisy Mae 128K. -Yoo-hoo! And the Crush-A-Nator! Yoo-hoo. Whoo.

Fry · Bender:You didn't touch the Crush-A-Nator, did you? Of course not. A lady that fine, you gotta romance first.

Fry · Leela · Bender:Hey, cool! Dark side of the moon. Nightfall's coming. -Hurry, before we freeze! -What do you mean 'we,' mammal?

Fry:My foot's bigger. Isn't this the greatest thing you've ever seen?

Fry:I was up really late poking through people's desks.

Fry:Hey, when you look this good, you don't have to know anything.

Fry:Hey, Professor. Mmm. Great jerky.

Fry:Sheesh. 40,000 channels and only 150 of them have anything good on.

Fry:Hmm, must be a friend of theirs.

Leela · Fry:No, Fry, by 'close quarters' I mean this office. Uh-huh. And by 'people,' I mean you. Right. And by 'inconsiderate,' I mean... Leela, we're trying to watch TV.

Fry:Hey, uh, why is the TV getting smaller?

Bender · Fry:You barely touched your amoeba. You want it? Nah, I'm trying to watch my input. I need plenty of wholesome, nutritious alcohol.

Fry · Bender:What are the cigars for? They make me look cool.

Fry · Bender:Do refrigerators still come in cardboard boxes? Yeah, but the rents are outrageous.

Fry · Bender:Y-You sure I won't be imposing? Nah. I've always wanted a pet.

Bender · Fry:Bath what? Bathroom. What room? Bathroom. What, what?

Fry:He put in carpeting yesterday and now my head hits the ceiling.

Amy · Fry:Hey, do you realize you're standing at a weird angle? Now you're okay.

Fry · Landlord:Well, I give up... what's the catch? Oh, no catch. Although we are technically in New Jersey.

Fry:Wow. Heavy-drinking crowd.

Fry:Well, you were going to live in the closet anyway. Won't you be just as happy back in your old place?

Fry:Don't girl me with that girl stuff. Bender and me are guys. Guys don't have feelings.

Fry:You're blind stinking sober.

Fry:It's not like he's a ham radio or something.

Leela · Fry:Don't help him mutilate himself. But it's a useless antenna. It's not like he's a ham radio or something.

Bolt · Fry:Remember when those cyborgs enslaved humanity? Uh... yeah. That rings a bell.

Fry:Why two? Oh.

Bender · Fry:What she ought to do... is find a nice guy with two eyes... and poke one out. Yeah. That'd be a time-saver.

Fry:You really are too picky.

Fry:The planet's 'kerploding.'

Leela · Fry:Nothing. We just talked. So what's your problem? It's not like you slept with him. Oh, my God!

Fry:I thought you had some standards. I mean, geez, he's a dumb gross gorilla.

Fry:At least hot dogs didn't change.

Fry · Leela:I'm getting the hang of this. The blerns are loaded, count's 3 blerns, 2 anti-blerns, and the blern rule's in effect, right? / Except for the word 'blern,' that's total gibberish.

Bender · Fry:But how many robot managers are there? -Eleven? -Zero!

Professor · Bender · Fry:Great news, everyone. You'll be delivering a package to Chapek 9. / Where humans are killed on sight. / Why is that great news?

Fry:I can dance like a robot. Will that help?

Leela · Fry:We look stupid. We should've gotten store-bought costumes. / But there's no Woolworth's nearby.

Fry:Robot we be. Just two robots out roboting it up.

Fry · Guard:Is the puppy mechanical at all? / No. It's the bad kind of puppy.

Leela · Fry:Come on, Fry. Walk like a robot. / I have to go to the bathroom. / Robots don't have bathrooms. / Right. Where do they smoke in high school?

Robot · Fry:Sir? Are you aware you're leaking coolant at an alarming rate? / Let me patch you up with hot resin.

Fry · Leela:Wow! The 3-D's great! -Mine's not working.

Fry:God help us!

Fry · Judge:Yeah! He may not have a case, but I am genuinely not a human. / Quiet, human!

Fry:Damn right!

Bender · Fry · Leela:Thanks. You know I made Robanukah up to get out of work, right? / Of course. / That doesn't make it less meaningful.

Fry:Uh, excuse me. I missed a few lectures. Uh, what subject is this? Ancient Egyptian Algebra. What a nightmare!

Fry:Well, sure, but not in our dreams only on TV and radio and in magazines and movies and at ball games and on buses and milk cartons and T-shirts and bananas and written on the sky but not in dreams. No, sirree.

Fry · Salesperson:Can I try these on before I buy them? I'm afraid I can't let you open the package but you can try on the demo pair.

Fry:Ooh. Ho-ho-ho.

Fry · Bender:Hey, Bender. Great new sweater. Uh, 'new'? What sweater? I came in with it! I don't know you people.

Fry:What kind of world is this where they advertise things not everybody can afford?

Fry · Leela:Hey, who's the rocker jockey? Guh! It's Mom the world's most huggable industrialist.

Fry:I'd love to chip in, but Bender stole my wallet.

Fry:Sure. It's the price of a cheese pizza and a large soda back where I used to work Pinucci's Pizza.

Fry · Pizza Guy:Anchovies. You know those little headless fish? Does not compute.

Fry:I have an idea for a sitcom.

Fry · Auctioneer · Leela:Don't tell me how to spend my money. 50, going once, twice... $75,000. Oh, my God. It's Mom.

Fry · Auctioneer:One jillion dollars. Sir, that's not a number. Oh. In that case 50 million.

Fry:I like big butts and I cannot lie # You other brothers can't deny

Fry:I could if you hadn't turned on the lights and shut off the stereo.

Fry · Bender:I finally found what I need to be happy and it's not friends... it's things. I'm a thing.

Walt · Fry:We're here to tighten your drains. Ow!

Fry:10.77 same as my PIN number.

Pamela Anderson · Fry:Thanks a billion. More like 4.3 billion.

Fry:You might as well put that checkbook away because I've discovered something even more important my friends, and they aren't worth even a penny to me.

Everyone · Fry:Gross! Ick! Mm. Eh, no one likes them at first... but they'll grow on you.

Fry · Zoidberg:There aren't anymore, and there never will be. More!

Fry · Bender:Fry asks what Bender's watching, Bender denies cooking show and claims 'It was porno. Yeah, that's it!'

Fry:Fry complains 'You call that a couch? I demand a pillow!'

Alien vendor · Fry:Vendor warns Fry 'You're not in the 20th century. You don't know how things work' to which Fry responds 'I'm not a kid'

Fry · Aliens:Fry claims 'I grew up in this city. These are my people' then awkwardly greets aliens with 'What up?' 'Word.'

Fry:When told swamp root 'makes you irresistible to the opposite sex', Fry says 'That's ridiculous. I'll take two pounds'

Fry:About purple slug causing diarrhea, Fry says 'Either one is fine'

Fry · Organ dealer:The rapid-fire organ trading scene with lungs, gills, and 'Can't imagine why I would' need lungs

Professor · Fry:Professor's 'Good news' followed by Fry saying 'I don't like the sound of that!'

Fry:After tasting Bender's salty cooking: 'That's the saltiest thing I ever tasted. I once ate a bowl of salt.'

Fry:Fry burping after claiming innocence about drinking the emperor

Fry:Fry's logic: 'Chances were equally good it was an emperor'

Fry · Bender:Fry choosing Bender as prime minister: 'In your face, Gorgak'

Fry · Bender:Harem selection scene with Bender's reactions to Fry's choices

Fry:Fry's response about reign length: 'I knew you wouldn't ask unless it was really high or low'

Fry:Fry's mangled fable: grasshopper burying acorns while octopus watches TV, ending with octopus getting race car

Fry:Fry's coronation: 'What up?' instead of formal oath opening

Bender · Fry:Bender trying to make Fry cry: 'You're a pimple on society's ass! You'll never amount to anything!' Fry: 'I was emperor of a planet.'

Bender · Fry:Bender's existential attack: 'Everyone you knew or loved in the 20th century is dead.' Fry: 'These things happen.'

Bender · Fry:'There is no God, and your human ideals are laughable!' 'Phew! That's a load off my mind.'

Fry:Phew! That's a load off my mind

Fry:There were many times in my century when I never gave up. Never. Are you even listening to me? Oh, I give up.

Fry · Leela:As long as you don't make me smell Uranus. -I don't get it.

Farnsworth · Fry:Astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all. -What's it called now? -Urectum.

Farnsworth · Fry:Here, let me locate it for you. No, I think I'll just smell around over here.

Fry · Leela:You got that off the Internet? In my day it was only used to download porn. -Actually, that's still true.

Fry · Leela · Bender:-What do you do with it? -We recycle. -Robots are made from old beer cans. -And this can's made from old robots.

Fry · Leela:Give me a break. What do you do with it? We recycle.

Fry:The future is disgusting.

Leela · Fry:-Those are from the 19th century. -They probably just copied us.

Fry:Sporty.

Fry:It's not filth. It's a monument to 20th-century achievements.

Fry:And when my toilet broke, I just went straight in the garbage can.

Fry:This Slurm can? Now it's garbage. These papers? Garbage. This picture of your wife? Pure garbage.

Fry:Get that robot some more beer!

Leela · Farnsworth · Fry:Should we be celebrating? What if it returns to Earth like the first one? -Who cares? That would take centuries. -Exactly. It's none of our concern. -That's the 20th-century spirit!

Fry · Farnsworth:Who cares? That would take centuries. Exactly. It's none of our concern. That's the 20th-century spirit!

Fry:Will you guys shut up? I'm trying to look cool.

Beastie Boys · Fry:That was a thousand years ago. Now we got seven. Cool. Can I borrow the new ones? And a couple of blank tapes?

Fry · Bender:Who was that guy? Your mama. Now shut up and drag me to work.

Hermes · Fry:If I didn't know better, I'd almost think he was abusing electricity. Bender? No way. I definitely would have noticed something.

Fry · Bender:I know big Vinnie said he was giving me the kiss of death... but I still think he was gay. Did he use his tongue? A little.

Fry:Just like when my friend Richie swore he wasn't taking drugs... and then he sold me my mom's VCR. And then later, I found out he was taking drugs.

Fry · Bender:Great. He's whacked out on electricity again. No, I'm whacked out on life.

Fry:Religion? Is this another scam to get free yarmulkes?

Fry:I'm hungrier than a green snake in a sugarcane field.

Bender · Fry:I'd like to give everyone hugs. Come here, Fry. Oh, uh, but I don't want to.

Fry · Leela:Bender's stupid religion is driving me nuts. / Amen.

Leela · Fry:What in hell happened to Bender? Well, he didn't check out. The ashtray's still here.

Fry · Professor Farnsworth:Who would have thought hell would really exist? And that it would be in New Jersey?

Bender · Fry:I could if you dropped the stupid gold violin. Oh, sorry.

Fry:Never go to a planet called 'Cannibalon.' That's right. Food was good, though.

Fry:Great! I haven't had time off since I was 21 through 24.

Fry:Looks nice.

Leela · Fry · Leela:God, not Zapp Brannigan! / You know Zapp Brannigan? / Let's just say we've crossed paths.

Fry · Fry:Huh? Ooh! / How do you do?

Fry:At least we get a window.

Fry:It's romantic- I mean, platonic. That sure is one platonic view.

Leela · Fry:I'm beginning to think this whole fake fiancé thing was a terrible- / Hm? Mmm.

Fry:Well, you got anything else for him?

Fry:I learned how to handle delicate situations... from a show called Three's Company.

Fry:Come and knock on our door

Fry:Mr. Roper....

Fry:Talk about a mood killer.

Fry:I'll say you died prying the ring off his dead finger.

Professor · Fry:- What field? - I don't care. The pay's the same.

Fry · Bender:- What was your minor? - Robo-American Studies.

Fry:Good old Coney Island College. Go Whitefish!

Fry:Math of wonton burrito meals. I'll be there!

Fry:I understood the word "hat."

Fry:What do you call it? Lite Brite!

Fry:That monkey kept me up all night with his constant thinking.

Fry:That'll show him.

Fry:Look at me. My folks were honest, hardworking people.

Fry:He's not your father. That guy in the punch bowl was your father.

Fry · Bender:He belongs in the wild, or the circus on a tiny tricycle. - Now that's entertainment.

Fry · Leela:- Wow! So this is a real TV station? - Well, it's a Fox affiliate.

Fry:That's a chick show. I prefer programs of the genre "World's Blankiest Blank."

Bender · Fry:- She's in the world's shortiest skirt. - I'm in.

Fry:It's HDTV. It has better resolution than the real world.

Fry · Leela:- Not covered. - Just get in the car.

Fry:$50?! Not even if she was my girlfriend. Take her.

Fry:Sure. I just like TV better.

Fry · Lrrr:- Miniskirts? That sounds familiar. - Really?

Fry · Lrrr:- Wait, I know her. - You do not, you big fat liar.

Professor · Fry:- You see- - Magic. Got it.

Fry:It took an hour to write. I thought it'd take an hour to read.

Fry:Clever things make people feel stupid. Unexpected things make them feel scared.

Fry:Deep down I knew it might one day help me save the world.

Fry:At the end of the episode, everything is right back to normal.

Fry:Who says there are no more heroes?

Professor · Fry:Odds are mathematically insignificant. / I like those odds.

Fry:Rats! Just another tooth.

Fry:Right up until my third heart attack.

Fry · Zoidberg:I'm not Bender. I'm Fry. / I thought you were the robot. / Nope. Human.

Amy · Fry:That's my watch. / I was wondering where I put that.

Fry · Bender:Ow! My sperm! / Neat. Mind if I try that again?

Fry:Didn't hurt that time.

Fry:Wait a second. I'm getting an idea. No. False alarm. No. Yeah. No. Yeah. No. Wait. No. Yes!

Fry:I never want to see another can of Slurm again. I'm thirsty!

Fry · Glurmo:Can we have our free Slurm? - You'll have all you can drink...when you're partying with my good friend, Slurms McKenzie.

Grunka Lunkas · Leela · Fry · Grunka Lunkas · Leela:Grunka Lunka dunkity dinkredient / You should not ask About secret ingredient / Okay, we get the point. / I was curious about the guards. / Grunka Lunka dunkity darmed guards- / Shut up.

Leela · Fry:No. That's moronic. - Fine. I'll swim around and drink as much as I want.

Fry:Help! I can't swim!

Leela · Fry · Leela · Fry:My God, what if the secret ingredient is people? / There's already a soda like that. Soylent Cola. / How is it? / It varies from person to person.

Fry · Leela · Fry:There's already a soda like that. Soylent Cola. - How is it? - It varies from person to person.

Fry:I'm never going 12 minutes without a Slurm again.

Fry:I'm never going 12 minutes without a Slurm again.

Fry:Still warm.

Nixon · Fry · Nixon:Grandpa's making up stories again. / I'm not your grandpa. You're my uncle from the year 2000. / Okay, Grandpa.

Fry:Hey, that's not that bad.

Fry:He's 5.

Fry:Thanks for covering.

Fry:My friend's cousin's caseworker saw one. It's a widely believed fact.

Leela · Fry:He flushed himself down the toilet? Who's next?

Fry · Leela:It's your fault. Your emotions made him feel bad. You're right. I feel terrible. Now you're making him feel worse!

Fry:God bless America.

Fry:We're under Park Avenue. Ritzy!

Fry:Just think. All this was probably once a charity luncheon for the Met.

Fry:Shouldn't you eat my brain? You're mutants!

Fry:No, we're on top. Daylight and everything.

Fry:Nightfall? How can you tell down here?

Fry:I'm too scared! Your fear is being transmitted to Bender!

Fry:The secret is not giving a rat's ass about anyone... and only caring about things that you want... that you deserve, that the world owes you!

Fry:A reception table with muffins!

Fry:No, she just makes us work.

Fry · Bender:Beer? - Underwear?

Fry · Bender:Burn! - Nailed you, buddy!

Fry:And they'll be like...and we'll have pancakes to celebrate. And I'll be like...

Fry · Bender:Oh, man. - Let's mutiny.

Fry:So? We live in the United States. That's part of the world. I have been gone a long time.

Fry:These candidates sound like clones. Wait, they are clones!

Fry:If I were registered, I'd send a message by staying home on election day, dressed like a clown.

Fry:You're not registered? Not vaccinated, either.

Fry · Farnsworth:When did you care about voting? The very instant I became old.

Brain Slug candidate · Fry:Attach Brain Slugs to them. Sure, you say that now.

Party recruiter · Fry:Not with that attitude. Okay, screw it. Welcome aboard, brother! All right! You're out.

Fry:I got trashed on Listerine.

Fry:It was just a dream. There are no twos.

Fry · Bender:What about your self-destruct button? It's on my body!

Fry:Not for five cents, not for 500 cents.

Voter · Fry:He lost my vote. One vote won't make a difference.

Bender · Fry · Leela:It ain't my fault. I'm a non-voting felon. It's not my fault. I forgot to vote. Crud, I knew there was something I meant to do today.

Fry:At least you're not cold-blooded.

Fry · Bender:Trees down! Trees doWn! Cool. What if you want the trees up? Trees up! Trees down. Trees doWn.

Fry:Ah! Brisk.

Fry:Dad would whip up his special eggnog out of bourbon and ice cubes.

Fry:I'm the loneliest person on Earth.

Fry:I feel like a rat. I've been whining like a pig while Leela was lonely as a frog.

Fry:I'm one of those lazy homeless bums I've been hearing about. Can you point me to the free booze?

Pet shop owner · Fry:Best is a matter of opinion. I personally like the electric snail. That's a stupid animal. You're stupid. I said I want the best one.

Pet shop owner · Fry:The parrot is $500. That's a hell of a good parrot. Although, I could get 500 lizards for the same price. Girls like swarms of lizards, right?

Fry:You saved my life. I am going to get you so many lizards.

Fry · Robot Santa:Well, check it twice. I perform over 50 mega-checks per second.

Fry · Robot Santa:What about the traditional glass of hard cider? Oh, all right. But just one glass.

Fry:Oh, God, the pain!

Fry:And even though I'm surrounded by robots and monsters and old people... I've never felt more at home.

Fry:Now this is progress: A self-microwaving Bavarian Cream Dog

Fry:Let's just pray I have the energy to get another beer

Fry:Co-ed steam rooms. I love the future

Leela · Fry:You're in the women's steam room. - Ah, futuristic

Woman · Fry:Hey, handsome. Have room for two? - You wish

Fry:Hey, Leela, look who's the super stud

Fry:Looks like Zoidberg's finally coming out of his shell! Get it?

Fry:That's how you say 'Zoidberg'?

Fry · Female Crustacean:It's offensive! - Keep your jelly away from my eggs

Fry:I can get any girl, any time. I'm just too busy

Fry · Zoidberg · Fry · Edna:You just want to talk. - I just want to talk. - That doesn't make sense. - That doesn't make sense. But okay

Zoidberg · Fry:Look, she won't shut up. - It's normal. Just nod and say, 'Uh-huh.'

Zoidberg · Fry:Ask to mate? - Third date

Fry · Bender:Turn it over. - Oh. 'Edna! Of all the gross crab monsters on this planet...you are the hottest.'

Fry · Edna:He's got jelly out the wazoo. - That is where it comes out

Fry:I'm flattered. If I did it with a mudbug, you'd top the list

Zoidberg · Zoidberg · Fry · Zoidberg:What?! - Fry! I challenge you to Claw Plock! - English, please? - A fight to the death!

Fry · Official:But I don't want her! - The tradition of Claw Plock can't be taken back

Fry:Today I got up and I had a piece of toast...then I brushed my teeth...

Fry:Nobody correct him

Fry · Leela:It's a fight to the death! - Suddenly it's all about you! Sheesh

Fry:but will killing someone with a nutcracker solve anything?

Victor · Fry:Yeah, beautiful coffee. No, the Ford Thunder Cougar Falcon Bird!

Fry:I do, but I don't know how to make them stop!

Amy · Fry:Sixty thousand! ... I thought it was an auction

Fry:Valentine's Day's coming? I forgot to get a girlfriend again

Amy · Fry:The usual. Boiling lead, lava. So, what? Shorts?

Fry:I'm in the Astro-Afro-Antarctico-Amerasian Auto Association

Fry:You're rich. How come you dress like you're doing your laundry?

Fry:My folks were always on me to wear underpants. What am I, the pope?

Fry:Wow, we're great kissers

Fry:It was great. But now she's talking about hanging out. She's getting way too serious

Fry:I do my job, there's Amy. I go to the candy machine, there's Amy. I sleep with Amy, there's Amy

Fry:Face it, I'm a prize catch. I'm pulling down delivery boy money

Fry:She has billions in a trust fund. She wants a trophy husband

Fry · Amy:You know how you like chocolate but get tired of it... when it always wants to hang out? You don't like chocolate? Can chocolate let me finish?

Professor Farnsworth · Fry:Your body was badly damaged in the crash. How badly? That's it over there

Fry · Amy:I'll try not to interfere in your life. Sorry. I guess I control that arm

Fry · Amy:Okay, we're done with the bra. Why did you shave? Expecting something to happen with the date?

Amy · Fry:It's deodorant. What does it do?

Fry:20 minutes? You're ready now!

Fry · Bender:I've got a date. She's coming. ... Just like Fry's date. Get it?

Petunia · Fry · Bender:How's them eats? Don't mind if I do. ... She seems old. She's well-traveled. I don't mean she travels

Professor Farnsworth · Fry:There, good as new. Except your dorsal fin. I couldn't find it after the crash. I'll live without it? You call that living?

Professor Farnsworth · Fry:Why wouldn't you let me graft a laser cannon on your chest? To crush those who disobey you

Fry · Bender:It's not like you set us up with bad dates... just so we'd be together. Didn't I, Leela? Didn't I?

Fry · Bender:Watch the neck! My ass! My beautiful...

Fry · Bender:Bender, you said you were in this episode. No. I'm on Caught on Tape Three for what I did in the coffee pot.

Fry:If I ever wanna go back, I'll freeze myself again.

Leela · Fry:You know I yearn for a simpler time of barn dances and buggy rides before life was cheapened by heartless machines. But Bender, you are a...

Tour Guide · Fry:Which has yet to be deciphered. Do you know? Yes. A cop told me. It means, "Up yours."

Leela · Fry:Sorry, Bender, that's just a phone booth. What were they used for? In New York? Bathrooms.

Fry · Leela:"Tokens only." How does this work? I'll show you.

Fry · Leela:What's this? Another bathroom? It's a mobile apartment with no rent.

Fry:My girlfriend had one! Actually, she wasn't my girlfriend... she just never closed her curtains.

Fry:I'm sorry. You work here. I should have known from that getup.

Fry:No one in New York drove. There was too much traffic.

Fry:It's just like riding a bicy...

Fry · Flexo:I don't get it. We're both the sum of two cubes.

Flexo · Fry:Your stunt did a number on my back. You mind rubbing it for me? Sure. That's it. A little lower. How's that? Lower. That's it. A little lower, though. I can't get any lower. I'll say. You're rubbing my ass!

Fry · Bender:I don't like this place. It's 120 with little oxygen. Shut up and hoot.

Flexo · Fry:How about a lap dance for my pal here? No. That's all right. Really.

Fry · Leela:He's bad news. I regret hitting him. Take a rage dump. He's no worse than Bender.

Fry · Leela:He is. He drinks, smokes and posts naked photos of me. That's Bender. I'm talking about Flexo.

Fry · Leela:No, I'm not! Mark my words: Flexo's evil. He's the evil Bender. Rage dump.

Professor · Amy · Bender · Leela · Fry:Feast your eyes on this! It's beautiful! And huge! Can I touch it? What is it, already?

Professor · Fry:It's a single atom of Jumbonium. An element so rare the nucleus alone is worth more than $50,000. How much more? 100,000.

Flexo · Fry · Professor:Mister Professor, right here! We should stick with people we know. Flexo's great, but... Flexo's great? That's good enough for me.

Leela · Fry:You'll take eight-hour guard shifts. Bender, then Flexo, then Fry. Wait. Hold on. Let's go alphabetically. Okay. Bender, then Flexo, then Fry. Go by rank. Okay. Bender, then Flexo, then Fry.

Fry · Flexo:Flexo outranks me? That's "Flexo outranks me, sir!"

Fry · Bender:I'm not prejudiced. Save it for the cross burning, Adolf!

Flexo · Fry:Suit yourself, skinbag. I will. Good! Good! Good!

Fry · Bender:Why are you looking for Flexo in my underpants? He wasn't here 10 minutes ago, so I thought I'd check again.

Fry · Bender:Wait. You're Bender. Who said I wasn't?

Fry · Bob Barker:$200,000? $200,001? You're closest without going over.

Fry · Professor:Wait a second. Bender is the evil Bender? I am shocked! Shocked! Well, not that shocked.

Fry:I'm so confused. The Bender I like is evil, and the Bender I hate is good. How can I live my life and not tell good from evil?

Bender · Leela · Fry:You guys are losers... but I made out with the woman from the Radiator Planet. Fry, that's a radiator. Is there a burn ward nearby?

Fry:Let's ditch him and go to the movies.

Fry:Who invited you?

Fry:I thought it was real, like pro wrestling. But it's fixed, like boxing.

Fry:Poor little guy starved to death.

Fry · Professor:It smells like burning monkey. Oh? I guess when you're around it all day, you stop noticing.

Fry:My God! It's full of ads!

Fry:How about them Knicks?

Fry · Bender · Zoidberg:A woman? I'm scared! Thanks to the Internet, I'm bored with sex. Is the space pope reptilian?

Professor · Fry:We call it a video game. Video game, you say? Well, golly gee! You mighty spacemen of the future will have to show me how it works.

Fry:Gotcha! I won! I'm the greatest!

Fry:Kicked your ass.

Fry:Lazy sculptor.

Fry:Is that like a cemetery? Because I have to pee.

Fry:Yeah, they'll come in handy if I need to cover any tiny manholes.

Fry · Bender:Animals go in the corner. Why didn't I think of that?

Fry:My God! Four identical castles! Each more identical than the last!

Unknown friend · Leela · Fry:I only gamble with chumps. - I'll play. - I'm in!

Fry:Jamaican? I thought you were an outer space potato man.

Fry:No! Don't hurt him! He's my best friend... 's laundry.

Leela · Fry:Fry got his head stuck in a crater. - I thought it'd fit.

Morgan · Fry · Morgan:Why isn't this alphabetical? - What? - The zipper should be at the bottom.

Fry:It used to be milk, and time makes fools of us all.

Fry:This is the other Fry's locker. I'm 'Phry.'

Fry:Like every girl I dated.

Fry:Morgan? It's 3 a.m. A skunk knocked over my garbage, and I could only think of you.

Fry:I ordered him to flush out the professor's earwax.

Fry:But... But Bender need brain. For smart making!

Fry:When I was first asked to make a film about my nephew, the professor... I thought, why should I? Then later, Leela made the film. But if I had made it, there would be more topless women on motorcycles.

Fry:But if I had made it, there would be more topless women on motorcycles.

Fry · Leela:Leela, he could live another 100 years! No, he couldn't.

Leela · Fry:When you turn 160... robots from the Sunset Squad take you to a mysterious planet... and you never return. Wow, a whole planet of old people. Where is it? Nobody knows.

Fry:If only it'd work, you could go back and not waste your time on it.

Fry:Sorry, everyone. But need I remind you, blood is thicker than water. Blood. Thicker. Water.

Leela · Fry:You're his uncle, dummy. He takes after you! Yeah, well, what?

Fry:I'm zeroing in on him. BENGAY. Mothballs! Letters to the editor! It's the professor!

Fry:I'd like to see them find it.

Fry · Robot guard:Hey, you kids! Get off the lawn! Old people are often concerned that there are children on their lawns.

Fry:The engines don't move the ship at all! The ship stays where it is, and the engines move the universe around it!

Cubert · Fry:That's a complete load. Nothing's a complete load. Not if you can imagine it.

Fry:Oh, yeah? I once caught a fish this big.

Fry:I don't believe this! It's eating my bait! Beat it, you mooching crawdad!

Bender · Fry:I can hit a fish between the eyes from 20 yards. Yeah? I can hit a shrimp!

Fry · Bender:Bender, I just caught a fish this big! Quit exaggerating!

Fry:If I'm not gonna catch a fish, I might as well not catch a big fish.

Fry · Professor:I can't swallow that! Well, then, good news! It's a suppository.

Fry · Leela:A mermaid! You think you saw a mermaid? No, I did see a mermaid. She was wearing a tube top... and she had a scaly tail, and hair extensions.

Professor · Fry:Fry is suffering from ocean madness. Every time something good happens to me, you say it's madness. Or I'm drunk. Or I ate too much candy.

Fry:Thanks. They're called pants.

Fry:Sure, sometimes it falls from the sky. And sometimes it doesn't.

Fry:Yep! We call them land sea lions. I tame them.

Fry:I think it was just an airport. They had a place to buy nuts.

Fry:Realize it? I don't even understand it!

Fry:Sorry, I'm trying to join the country club.

Fry:I'm a little confused too! How do I... you know, with the tail and all?

Fry:Why couldn't she be the other kind of mermaid... with fish part on top, and lady part on bottom?

Fry:Turns out I loved her, but I wasn't in love with her.

Fry:No, this one is! Wait, that one was worse. Ah, so far so good on this one!

Fry · Bender:Bender, try to be a little quieter. - No, you shut up!

Leela · Fry:Leela! We're right here! I'm not deaf! I just have to wear a patch. Does it look stupid? No! It looks so nice, I think I might get one too.

Fry:Jerk chicken, jerk beef, jerk pork! Is there any meat he can't jerk?

Amy · Fry:It's robot food. It's so good! Just try a little. No, really, I don't... Are you all right? Oh, yeah, the salad's fantastic! So fresh.

Fry · Amy · Leela · Professor:Bender's a model employee! He's so polite! And hardworking. He's made of candy.

Fry:You look beautiful! My favorite artist is Picasso!

Fry:Wait, the letters that normally say 'Master Steering Wheel Co.' say 'Nibbler.' Oh, no!

Fry:Great. The one time I forgot to buy flight insurance!

Bender · Fry:Chew on this! What ho! Stop it! Take that, you twit! No, stop it!

Fry · Leela:Maybe someday I'll tell. And maybe someday I won't listen.

Fry:I hate the Moochers. They offer you a drink... but their wallet's always in the other pants... which they borrowed from me!

Fry:I'm good at foraging. I found mushrooms on my bathmat.

Fry · Bender:I found some rocks! You eat rocks, right? Not even sautéed in a little mud?

Fry · Bender:Look! A ditch full of fried shrimp! Are you blind? Looks more like a hole full of fried prawns.

Fry:They're great! They're like sex! Except I'm having them!

Fry:I'll be rich! You too, but that doesn't excite me.

Amy · Fry:Parrots talk and we eat them, right? Maybe it learned as a parlor trick. Like Fry. Like Fry! Like Fry!

Bender · Fry:You're just a carbon-based life form... but I'll always think of you as a big pile of titanium. Just like titanium.

Fry:Tell it to Wingus and Dingus.

Fry · Bender:That's Leela! I'm seeing double!

Fry:Hear me out! There are many good reasons to eat! Hunger, boredom, wanting to be the world's fattest man!

Fry:That gives me a headache!

Fry:Someday I want to marry a girl like her.

Fry · Garbage disposal:Really? - No!

Fry:Fan beats man!

Fry:Good night, sweet prince.

Fry:All right, you're nonchalant. Don't rub our noses in it.

Fry:Here's to another lousy millennium.

Fry · Nibbler:Is one of you I.C. Wiener? If that's his pizza, then I am.

Fry · Stephen Hawking:Stephen Hawking! Didn't you invent gravity? Sure. Why not?

Fry:Isn't your sole duty to break ties in the Senate?

Stephen Hawking · Fry:I call it a 'Hawking Hole.' Hey, I saw it first! Who will The Journal of Quantum Physics believe?

Fry · Stephen Hawking:I call it a 'Hawking Chamber.' But I missed and wanged my head.

Hermes · Amy · Fry · Leela:Mail call! Amy, your designer lingerie catalog. Fry, Sadie's Bra Parade. And Leela, Bulk Underpants Outlet.

Fry:Relax. You were probably just shooting big fuzzy craps.

Fry:You jerk! I thought I was your best friend! What kind of two-timing kill-mobile are you?

Leela · Fry:Could you help me? Bender crushed my foot. Stop rubbing it in!

Fry:Words. Nothing but sweet words turning into bitter orange wax in my ears.

Fry:I wish I was stupid and violent. We'd see what's what. I'd pound him till--

Fry:Whoa, whoa! You're 1000 years old? Your bio says you're 27.

Calculon · Fry:Knight Rider wasn't evil. His windshield wipers were. It didn't come up in the show.

Fry · Project Satan:Oh, no! There's no exhaust pipe! That's right, thanks to Ed Begley Jr.'s electric motor, the most evil propulsion system ever conceived!

Fry:Yes! He chose me! He's trying to kill me! Leela, I'm so happy!

Bender · Fry:That's my last beer, you bastard! I'll kill you! I'll kill you too, buddy. I'll kill you too.

Fry:Full price for gum? That dog won't hunt, Monsignor.

Fry:And this ham gum is all bones.

Fry:Cool effect!

Nixon · Fry:Also, they said you look like dorks! They look like dorks! I'm gonna--

Fry · Bender:Mind if we sit with you? Why the hell would I?

Fry · Bender:And then the battle's not so bad? Right, I forgot about the battle.

Dying Soldier · Fry:Wait. I didn't tell you where he lives. Your son might also like those boots.

Fry:It isn't war, it's murder!

Fry:I did it! Wait, that's not me.

Fry:At last, war has made me into a man.

Fry:At last, war has made me into a man.

Fry:I guess you learned a valuable lesson. Don't mess with Earth!

Fry · Bender:We come in peace. Tough luck!

Bender · Fry:Hey, Fry! I'm steering with my ass! The best thing I ever saw!

Fry:Oh, you know... What about money? All I've got is my first mustache... and a picture of my old girlfriend, Michelle... and that ski instructor who's just her friend.

Leela · Fry:I tried to give you one and you ran away? It's how we met? Then what happened? Just give me your hand. Baby.

Career counselor · Fry:They're okay. Then we'll redecorate your office.

Defrostee · Fry:I wanted to meet Shakespeare and I figured time was cyclical. Nope. Straight line.

Fry:The probulator's done. That wasn't so bad. Oh, wait, it hasn't started yet. Okay, it's about to start.

Fry · Leela:They'll find a cure in the future. We have a cure now! Good. Then you won't mind if I use this.

Pizza guy · Fry:It's only been 23 minutes, you dumb cannoli! You got a problem, let's take it outside! Okay. I'll fight the box. I can take him.

Fry:Oh, my God, it's Pauly Shore! All right! I loved you in Bio-Dome. You sure made trouble in that bubble.

Pauly Shore · Fry:I was supposed to be unfrozen... for the 1000th anniversary screening of Jury Duty II. How come I'm not there? I woke you up early to hang out and do stuff.

Michelle · Fry:Fry? Is it really you? I don't know. Is it really you? What do you mean? Are you you, or not? Who wants to know?

Fry · Michelle:Same reason they kept me out of school. No one cared I was gone? Not really. Except for one person.

Fry:Og, gorilla emperor of Earth!

Bender · Fry:So, as Leela was saying, Fry can go shove a big, old-- Hey, Fry!

Zoidberg · Fry:Dating your ex, Fry? Have you lost all self-respect? All what?

Fry:It's different now. She was demanding and possessive. Now she wants me to do stuff, be with her.

Fry:I thought you meant a motel where the bed is shaped like stuff.

Fry:Michelle, I don't regret this. But I rue and lament it.

Fry:It'd be deeper, but I'm standing on a gopher.

Butch · Fry:Death rolling. What? It's like skateboarding. Except half the time, someone dies. So it's safer than skateboarding.

Michelle · Fry:My mother always said you were a loser. Now go prove her wrong! Beth said that?

Small child · Fry:I won! I'm the new chief! I'm the tallest and I weigh the most! Hand it over, you giant idiot!

Michelle · Fry:You were a loser in the year 2000, you're a loser in the year 4000. But in 3000, I had it all. Friends, a low-paying job, a bed in a robot's closet! I envied no man! But you wrecked everything!

Fry · Leela:So these aren't the decaying ruins of New York in 4000? You wish. You're in Los Angeles!

Fry:The people are phony. No one reads. Everything has cilantro on it--

Fry:You're eating a sandwich from a men's room? What's the worst thing that could happen?

Fry:It's like a party in my mouth, and everyone's throwing up.

Fry:You take that back! She does not look good for a truck-stop chick!

Fry:She does too! She's got more meat than a cow.

Fry:My lead pipe hurts a little.

Fry:He's a witch!

Leela · Fry · Leela:Is it about Bender? / No, it's about you and me. / And Bender?

Fry:Apartment 1-I. The old me would joke about that.

Fry · Leela:I'm thinking of having a window installed. / The view's perfect already.

Fry:I haven't felt this happy since double-soup Tuesday.

Fry · Worm:I am the lord mayor of Cologne! / You mean colon?

Fry:Obviously you've never been in love.

Fry:I don't know. I got nervous and started thinking about neck bolts.

Fry:Wow, did you see that vase break? It was all like:

Fry:I'll give you a back rub just like I used to give Amy. She always seemed to... Uh-oh.

Fry:So has Fry. What's the big deal?

Fry:He's got me beat.

Fry · Bender:Bender, think of the señoritas! Vámonos!

Fry:They were probably nagged to death. Are you with me, fellas?

Fry:FYI, I could be used for snu-snu.

Fry · Amazon:What did they die of? - Crushed pelvises.

Fry · Zapp:Yes! Thank you, Lord in heaven!

Fem-puter · Fry · Zapp:...by snu-snu! - Yeah! - What are you, gay?

Fry:I never thought I'd die like this, but I'd always really hoped.

Amazon · Fry:It time snu-snu! - Can't we just cuddle?

Fry:A bunch of stuff gets bent, so it must be the robot designed for bending.

Fry:Wait, there on the screen! It's that guy you are!

Fry:I wish. It's a nickel.

Fry:Don't listen to them. People said I was dumb, but I proved them.

Leela · Fry:- The planet we live on? - I'd hate to be those guys.

Bender · Fry:- Help me! My heart stopped! - You don't have one. You're a robot.

Fry · Bender:- Well, yeah. Robots are made of metal. - Am I a robot?

Fry · Leela:- A pickle jar? - Thomas Jefferson?

Fry:A giant brain is basically a giant nerd. And where would a giant nerd be? The library!

Fry:That's right! You'll find a little knowledge is a dangerous thing!

Fry:Hardy Boys? Too easy. Nancy Drew? Too hard. Perfect! Bonfire of the Vanities!

Fry · Leela:- Big whale over there. - I saw it first.

Jane Austen character · Fry:A bachelor at your age. - I'm an oddity? Wait till...

Fry · Bender:Since when have you been in the biz? Long enough, little man. Long enough.

Leela · Fry:Pay the valet the 2 bucks. No! It's the principle of the thing. I see a parking lot ahead.

Fry:What was that? A tar dolphin? Or a tar shark?

Fry:She let me sit on her lap and steer, in this comic I drew.

Fry:We're hitched up tighter than Davy Jones' U-Haul.

Fry:Didn't you realize spaceships can move in three dimensions?

Fry:Fine, I've got a toast. To Captain Bender. He's the best...at being a jerk, and his ugly face is as dumb as a butt.

Fry · Free Waterfall Sr.:Are they black with white feathers...or white with black feathers? - Don't matter. They're all beautiful.

Fry · Amy · Fry:They sent us inside for doing an unsatisfactory job. - And eating penguin eggs. - You ate most of them.

Fry:I don't think we're on Pluto. We may have left space as we know it.

Fry:If only we had a toboggan!

Fry:Right, they can swim. It's all coming back to me now.

Fry · Leela:At least it'll help reduce their population. Yeah, life is hilariously cruel.

Fry:No fair! You changed the outcome by measuring it.

Fry:I'll tell you when my horse finishes. - Bad.

Fry:I meant tongue luck.

Fry:I've run over black cats that were luckier than me.

Vendor · Fry:Horse Pepsi okay? - Neigh!

Fry:Dear Horse God, I don't usually pray. Sometimes I doubt you even exist.

Fry:Don't do that. What are you...? It's contagious.

Fry:I may not know about horses, but I know lots about doing anything for $1.

Fry:If you think bad luck can defeat me, you don't know my name is Philip J...

Fry · Fry:What happened to this clover? - I hid it in a secret place and never told anyone. Not even Scruffy.

Fry:The city that inspired a casino in Las Vegas.

Fry:Howard Stern is overrated.

Fry:71st Street? Never heard of it.

Fry:That feels funny!

Fry:That's the bench where I found shirts. We used to light that hydrant on fire!

Leela · Fry:Was it poorly xeroxed? - Oh, yeah.

Andy Goldman · Leela · Fry:I'm teaching. - He seemed nice. - Sure, when he's sober.

Fry:Man, Father Time really took a bat to this place.

Fry · Leela:Yet there was no nuclear war. - What a waste.

Fry:Good Lord! He ditched his goofy name and stole mine.

Professor · Fry:You opened the vault, and the clover was gone? - Nothing in there but the best music of the 1980s.

Fry:Survivor, Pat Benatar, The Scorpions. The list goes on.

Fry · Bender:Good, we're going grave robbing. - I'll get my kit.

Fry:He wasn't original. He wasn't a Martian. He wasn't Philip. He wasn't a 'the.'

Fry:Pay dirt! I got the clover, plus his wedding ring. Sorry, ladies, I'm taken.

Fry · Amy:The gristle in a blanket isn't half bad. - Try the Popsicle sticks. They've absorbed a lot of flavor.

Fry · Bender:Why are they with you? Do you have candy? - No. It's called parenting.

Fry:You're better, you're abnormal!

Fry · Amy · Hermes:She looked fine before. - No. - Wrong.

Fry · Zoidberg:He's a weird monster who eats garbage. - Damn right.

Fry · Hermes:Hermes is a Rastafarian accountant. - Tally me banana.

Fry:I already did!

Fry:Also, I need athlete's foot cream for my face.

Fry:Cherry. Cherry! Mule. Crud!

Fry · Public Defender:I won't testify on grounds that my organs will be chopped up into a patty. The 67th Amendment.

Fry:Ow, my head! Ow, my feet! Ow, my head! Ow, my feet!

Fry:What the...? I find that offensive!

Fry · Medical staff:[Visual gag: Medical examination reveals Fry as robot on scanner]

Fry:See? I'm all squishy and flabby. Also, I complain a lot.

Fry:The car dealer? I guess his prices really were insane.

Fry · Malfunctioning Eddie:We've met. What?!

Fry:Unless they're Oreos, and only in the mouth.

Fry:Thirty days, September, April, June. Peanut butter.

Fry:Affirmative. I feel nothing. I am a robot. Beep, beep, beep...

Fry:I must be a robot. Why else would human women not date me?

Fry:I must be a robot. Why else would human women not date me?

Fry:Relax, mammal. My robotic software shall meet your calculatory needs.

Fry · Hermes:Fear not, for I shall assist ye! / Robots don't say 'ye.'

Fry:I'll show ye.

Fry:By a scallop's forelocks, what's with all the beer?

Fry:Alcohol fuels my power cells. And, as a mighty robot, I... Beep.

Fry:Fifty-six-ish?

Fry:I am a battle-droid, protecting the weak from crazy robots.

Fry:No knife can penetrate my skin-tanium armor.

Fry:Blood? Robots don't have blood. I must be a... A squid?

Fry:Oh, my God! They dug up a bag of olestra chips from my time!

Fry · Unknown · Bender:Mind if I take this old van? Sure. You wanna dump the corpses out of there, it's yours. Yeah, I've gotten used cars before.

Unknown · Fry:What's that? One of those Jefferson Starships? It's called a van. And in light of the fact it's not rocking, I invite you to come knocking.

Fry · Unknown:It's a triumph of German engineering! The speedometer only goes up to 80. It can't go faster than 80,000 mph?

Fry · Unknown · Bender:Why won't it start? - It needs gas. Wrong again, idiot. There is no gas. Petroleum reserves ran dry in 2038.

Doctor · Fry · Doctor:This is the worst part of the job. - Good news? Bender, your hydraulics are shot. You'll never move again.

Fry · Leela:Poor Bender! - Well, let's drag him to the curb.

Fry:We can't just dump him in the gutter like Grandma's ashes.

Fry:Kudos, Bender! You got mangled, and now you're a singer. Both our dreams came true.

Fry · Unknown · Bender:Oh, no! My beautiful money! - It got ruined in the wash! - Mine too, even my change.

Fry · Leela · Fry:I forgot it's a hoverbridge! - I forgot this isn't a hover car! - Is that a problem?

Fry · Leela:Those aren't swan boats. They're swans. / That explains these boat eggs.

Fry · Leela:Your face can take a lot of punishment. Good to know. / There's a lot about my face you don't know. You and it should get acquainted.

Fry:Did everything just jump around? Or did my brain just stroke off there?

Fry:Because when we're together in here, baby, time will stand still.

Fry:What's that funky jazz?

Fry:I got her champagne. What does a guy have to do?

Fry:And hypnosis is for losers with big eyebrows.

Bubblegum Tate · Fry:But ask yourself, are you funky enough to be a Globetrotter? / Are you? / I mean, with time my funk level... / Are you? / No. / Deal with it.

Fry:My life, and, by extension, everyone else's, is meaningless.

Fry:That's how I did it. I moved the stars to write her a love note.

Fry · Leela:Did you see it? / The explosion? / No, not the explosion. / Then what? / Nothing.

Fry:A big floating ball that lit up with every color in the rainbow... plus some new ones that were so beautiful I cried.

Fry:I don't care if it was a dork in a costume. For a moment, I felt the heartbeat of creation, and it was one with my own.

Leela · Fry:So your fantasy has always been to destroys a planet? - Yeah. What did they ever do for me?

Fry · Leela:Far out. So there's an infinite number of parallel universes? - No, just the two.

Fry:Well, I'm sure that's enough.

Fry:The tongue tickles.

Fry:Download a celebrity. What part of that do I understand?

Nappster Employee · Fry:Gwyneth Paltrow? - Nah. I read she drinks human blood.

Fry:I'd prefer someone with shaved underarms.

Fry:I'd like the 2003 model.

Leela · Fry:Well, duh! She's programmed to like you. - But this is Lucy Liu, the only good actress of the 21st century.

Lucy Liu-Bot · Fry:Would you like to register me? - I'll remind you later, you hot stud.

Lucy Liu-Bot · Fry:When I feel so stuffed I can't eat... I use the restroom, and then I can eat more. - You should write a book. People need to know about the 'can eat more.'

Fry · Lucy Liu-Bot · Professor:You're cute. - You're cute. - You. - You. - Oh, dear. She's stuck in an infinite loop and he's an idiot.

Real Lucy Liu · Fry:Help me! They've been holding me prisoner for 800 years. - The real Lucy Liu! The one you can see a movie of.

Fry:Now that's a wave of destruction that's easy on the eyes.

Fry:This is the best movie I've ever seen. It has a vampire and an explosion.

Fry:You'll be safe in here, sweetheart. Get lost, Pavarotti.

Fry · Lucy Liu-Bot:You saved us. Are you all right? - Yes, my love. I'll be just... Massive corn clog in port seven.

Fry · Bender:But... But... - Don't be a prude, Fry.

Fry:I've never seen a supernova blow up... But if it's like my Chevy Nova, it'll light up the sky.

Fry:What smells like blue?

Fry:Which crazy thing happening are you guys screaming about?

Fry:My popcorn's done. It's less popped than ever.

Fry:But existing is basically all I do!

Fry:Not a day goes by I don't ask myself that.

Fry:I could feel myself fading away, like Greg Kinnear.

Fry:Yo, Homes, we need a microwave.

Fry:Oh. Women.

Fry:Hey, that's my brain!

Enos · Fry:That's my fiancée, Mildred. Grandma Mildred? No dessert.

Enos · Fry:You almost got neutered. Ain't as bad as killed. For me it is.

Fry:Well, I killed my grandfather. Wait, why do you still exist? I don't know. Maybe God loves me.

Fry · Leela:Well, I killed my grandfather. Wha...? Wait, why do you still exist? I don't know. Maybe God loves me.

Professor · Fry:What the hell have you done?! Relax. She can't be my grandmother. I figured it out.

Fry · Bender:What was it like lying in that hole for 1000 years? I was enjoying it until you showed up.

Fry:These letters are real butt-nutters.

Leela · Fry:No human could do all that. - Evel Knievel could.

Fry:This wangs chung.

Fry:Don't you see? Fear has brought us together. That's the magic of Xmas.

Fry:I'm good at video games and bad at everything else. I wish life was like a video game.

Fry:Can you say that as a question? What if that thing I said?

Fry:Wait. I know that monkey! His name is Donkey!

Fry:I spent all of ninth grade studying them... except the day my eyeballs started to bleed, and in my opinion...

Fry:Delicious! Just like stale marshmallows!

Fry:It's okay! I had another guy!

Fry:All right. It's Saturday night. I have no date, a two-liter bottle of Shasta... and my all-Rush mix tape. Let's rock!

Fry:One ship is left only! Come on, Fry! Get it! It's moving too fast! I could never get the last one! My brother always got it for me!

Fry · Leela:'Then, the car honked its own horn!' A talking scarecrow. Want to come with us to see the Professor?

Leela · Fry:He might give you a brain. Hey! That's not nice to say.

Fry:This is a stickup! Give me the bag, old man!

Fry:Oh, crap.

Fry · Leela:Here, Leela. 'U- R- 2 cute.' Perhaps. What's your point?

Fry:What was that? Maybe we hit a space cow.

Fry:It'd be like me dating a really fat lady and living inside her. And she'd be all like:

Fry:Hey, I won free admission to Six Flags! Just one more reason we must survive this.

Fry:Hey, I won free admission to Six Flags! Just one more reason we must survive this.

Fry:You leave me breathless

Bender · Fry:Sure, we talk about it all the time. Really? No. Burn!

Fry:Your parents must be so proud! Sorry.

Fry:Delicious fig pudding! That's good. But a distinct aftertaste of toxic waste.

Fry:If those aren't tears of happiness, please stop crying.

Fry:Yeah, I do that with my stupidness.

Fry:Because I happen to be a holding, stroking, loving machine. Also spanking.

Fry:It's like that time I peeked in the kitchen at Imperial Hunan.

Fry:Great Cheech's ghost!

Fry:And also, for some reason, the letter I wrote you full of my personal feelings.

Fry:Can we really never return to this dank pit of sewage?

Fry:That's impossible, because my time is worthless!

Orphanarium head · Fry:Would you like some dirt on any other orphans? I'm trying to save someone here. I'll have to come back for those later.

Fry · Professor:Is it done? Certainly not. Two dings means it's done. But not like that. Slightly more rapid.

Fry:A squeezably soft paper used mainly in the sewers.

Leo Wong · Fry:They sell whole planet for one bead. Sound stupid to me. - That is stupid!

Fry · Leela:Where? - Right in front of you. - Oh. Oh!

Fry · Leela · Bender:It was... the Windows logo! - That's not scary! - It is if you're a printer!

Kif · Fry:We're in the eye of the storm! - Where?

Bender · Fry:It's Bender. Why bother remembering anything? You'll forget it five seconds later.

Fry:Boy, I've never seen him so down, or ever before.

Fry · Leela:I'm stuck, but I haven't given up hope! Call a soft-news journalist! - You're not stuck. - Shut up!

Bender · Fry:You really are a massive bonehead! - I'm expressing sorrow. - Get lost! I'd say, 'Don't quit your day job,' but you're bad at it too!

Fry:I thought something looked different in here.

Fry:That's the only thing about being a slave.

Fry:This place is like the ancient Egypt of my day!

Fry:Nothing can get in or out except millions of snakes.

Leela · Fry:Hey, Fry? Remember that robot, Bender? - Bender? Doesn't ring a bell.

Fry · Bender:You have your legacy as a brutal, tyrannical dictator... and that will outlive any monument. - You think they'll remember me? - Absolutely. Well, in that case, one planet down.

Fry:Space pirates? You know, pirates, but in space.

Fry:We can't catch him even if we rub the engine with cheetah blood?

Fry:He always wanted to drift forever... But through the American Southwest.

Fry:Hooray! People are paying attention to me.

Gypsy · Fry:I am your friend, Bonder. Bonder? Is it really you? Yes. I am fine. Give the gypsy $10.

Gypsy · Fry:You want false hope or not? Only if there's no real hope.

Fry:You can't give up hope just because it's hopeless. You gotta hope even more and cover your ears and go, 'Blah, blah!'

Fry:None of that 'huddled for warmth' crap.

Fry · Monk:Like a giant karaoke machine? Not really. Want to see our giant karaoke machine? Not really.

Fry · Monks:Has anyone out there seen Bender? No! Quit asking!

Fry:I know he was evil, and on more than one occasion... He actually stole my blood.

Fry:I'll not only find it, I'll help you do more to it.

Fry · robot:So you guys don't believe in Robot-Jesus? He was built and was well-programmed, but he wasn't our messiah.

Fry:Bone-itis? That's a funny name for a horrible disease.

Fry:I nominate that guy. Because he knows about business and stuff and has a tie.

Fry:No, thanks. I make my own.

Fry:Get your stinking trike off me, you damn, dirty ape!

Fry · That Guy:Work really hard? - No. - Oh, thank God!

Fry:It grows the brand.

Fry:Don't worry. Let me worry about 'blank.'

Fry:Call me a booger-blaster! I'll blast a booger...

Fry · secretary:Suz, have I changed? - No, Mr. Fry. - Thanks, doll.

Fry:I had no idea the company would be sold! I was just an innocent suck-up!

Fry:I have more important things to do today than laugh and clap my hands.

That Guy · Fry:My bones! Oh, my God! His bone-itis!

Fry:I'll be whatever I want to do!

Fry:Makes me pine for my days as a delivery boy. 'Here's your pizza,' I'd say. 'I didn't order any,' they'd say. Then off to my next adventure.

Fry:As soon as I stop blasting puke... I'm gonna teach you to sell pizza.

Fry:For starters, use quality ingredients. Case in point? No more live bees.

Fry:When you put pizzas in the oven, don't get in with them.

Fry:Families need a TV so they don't have to talk to each other.

Fry:Like a sexy Yogi Berra. Why is your number 7/8?

Fry:You are! What about that little girl you visited in the hospital who died?

Fry:What's with the pots and pans? Building a wife?

Fry:I'd better warn... Tell... Warn-tell the others.

Fry · Zapp Brannigan · Kif:Double yes. Guilty! I will now carry out the sentence. Kif, my gun. / Wait! He pled not guilty! / Order! Order in the court! Very well then, Mr. Fry. Please recount the events that led you to be guilty.

Fry · Bender · Leela:Everybody hit the deck! Shh! Those words are forbidden. What words? Star Trek? Shh! Shut your gills!

Fry:You know, 1966? 79 episodes, about 30 good ones.

Fry:'Cause it taught me so much. Like how you should accept people, whether they be black, white... Klingon, or even female.

Fry · Nimoy:Oh, dip! / Dip, indeed.

Chekov · Fry:Ven vee voke up, vee had these wah-Dies. / Now say 'nuclear wessels'! No!

Shatner · Fry:Check out these abs. / Yowsa!

Melllvar · Fry:Until time stops. / What? You can't do this!

Shatner · Fry:I'm Slim Shady. Yes, I'm the real Shady. All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating. So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up? Please stand up? Please stand up? How can you do a spoken word version of a rap song?

Melllvar · Fry:For 100 quatloos, who did the captain maroon on Ceti Alpha V? / Khan! / Uh, Khan? Correct!

Fry · Melllvar:You have my fan script? / I meant me! Melllvar's the ultimate fan! / Oh, I was confused because the scoreboard says something different.

Leela · Fry · Nimoy:Usually on the show, someone would come up with a complicated plan... Then explain it with a simple analogy. / Hmm. If we can re-Route engine power through the primary weapons... And reconfigure them to Melllvar's frequency... That should overload his electro-Quantum structure. / Like putting too much air in a balloon! / Of course! It's so simple!

Shatner · Fry:My, what a handsome energy creature you are! I love you. / Hey, you wrote it!

Leela · Fry:It's not working! He's drawing strength from our weapons! / Like a balloon, and something bad happens!

Fry:Great list, except you forgot episode 66!

Fry:Great list, except you forgot episode 66!

Fry · Bender:There's no right way to hit a woman. Then do it the wrong way. Fine.

Fry · Leela:There's no right way to hit a woman. / Then do it the wrong way. / Fine.

Fry:We're too heavy! You guys need to lose some weight, fast!

Melllvar · Fry:Episode 10: 'Balance of Terror.' / More like episode nine, loser! / In your face! Victory is mine!

Fry · Shatner:And all you had to put up with was one really annoying Star Trek fan. / Let's get the hell out of here.

Fry:Man, it's hot. How hot is it? It's so hot, I poured McDonald's coffee in my lap to cool off.

Fry:Johnny Carson said it.

Fry · Farnsworth:Wow. Mining a comet. That sounds fun. Yes. There's no safer occupation than mining. Especially when you're perched on a snowball... whipping through space at a million miles an hour. Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Safe.

Fry · Leela:Wow. That ice dispenser's so big the ice crushes you. Yakov Smirnoff said it. No, he didn't.

Fry:Oh, my God! It's out of ice! Like some outer-space Motel 6.

Fry · Bender:You're both alcoholic, whore-mongering, chain-smoking gamblers? No. It's just... neither of us can get up when we get knocked on our back.

Zoidberg · Fry:I've got a degree in homeopathic medicine. You've got a degree in baloney.

Fry · Leela:That's awful, professor. Especially the making-out part. Yeah, I didn't need to hear that.

Leela · Fry:I don't hear any gasping. We all figured that out.

Fry:We can hide you. We'll pile fruit on you and claim you're a bowl.

Fry:Bender, this world isn't good enough for you. Not even close.

Fry · Robot:Crummy keg, it's completely tapped-- Oh, you're a robot. Don't stop.

Fry · Bender:Amazing! That's why they call you Bender the Magnificent. / No, it isn't.

Fry · Bender:You lived before you met me? / Sure. Lots of people did.

Fry:It was also used to move pizzas and crush rats.

Fry:Don't wave your fancy degrees at me.

Fry:Pizza delivery for Mr. Seymour Asses?

Customer · Fry:I hope that in time you'll realize what an idiot you've been. / I wouldn't count on that.

Fry:Here. But if Mr. Panucci asks, your name is Seymour Asses.

Fry:You're not constantly judging me, like all the other dogs.

Fry:You call no man 'Mister.'

Fry:Well, goodbye. Live long and prosper.

Fry:Ow! Ow! I'm taking him home and I'd like to see anyone try and stop me. Ow! Oh! Ow! Oh! Ah!

Fry · Leela · Fry:That's like digging up Lassie and putting her in the Louvre. / Lassie is on display in the Louvre. / I know. I was deliberately describing a similar situation.

Fry · Fry:Protesting never works. / You're right. I'll give it a shot!

Fry:Just like that huge mushroom in my shower.

Customer · Fry:He can do two things at one time: eat and swim. / Three things!

Fry:He was once intimate with the leg of a wandering saxophonist.

Fry:So will Seymour remember how to sing 'Walking on Sunshine'?

Fry:In your face, Grim Reaper! Crappy, ineffective reaper.

Fry:I.C. Wiener? Oh, crud.

Bender · Fry · Bender:Why waste time on a creature of inferior intelligence? / Hey, he was smart. He could fetch. / I can fetch!

Fry · Bender:He could dig up bones. / Hello? Charlemagne?

Fry:Know ye now what feels like to be dog god!

Fry · Cryogenicist:You can't solve all your problems by freezing them. / I think you're forgetting our motto.

Fry:Ah, beer. So many choices. And it makes so little difference.

Fry:How about Lobrau? It has dots on it.

Fry:I can't drink that. The metal shavings make my throat bloody.

Dwight · Fry:I heard alcohol makes you stupid. - No, I'm... Doesn't.

Fry · Professor · Amy · Leela:We don't work for you anymore! - What? - Dwight and Cubert made us an offer. - We're paperboys now.

Fry:Wow, nude hot-tubbing? That's all I need to hear about Freedom Day.

Old Man Waterfall · Fry:Name's Old Man Waterfall... but most folks just call me Old Man. I'll never remember that.

Fry:I'll never remember that.

Fry:I'm no good at being a slave. I'm thinking about graduate school to become a barber.

Fry · Leela:Hey, wait. I'm having one of those things. You know, a headache with pictures. An idea? Mm. Mm-mm-mm.

Fry · Bender:You didn't expect us to even go to a museum... much less steal this ancient heat-seeking missile! I don't even know you.

Fry · Bender:Dude, hold up. Remember when Zapp blew a hole in the ship? Indeed. Kif touched everybody there. Couldn't any one of us be the mother?

Fry:So the toilet seat is like the uncle or something?

Mugger · Fry:Hand over your wallets! I don't believe that story for a second. It doesn't matter, I'm mugging you! There's no bus to Jersey City.

Fry:I'm too scared to find my pocket. Here, I'll just take off my pants and give you those.

Fry:Maybe we're wearing magic rings, but they're invisible so we don't even realize it. Also, you can't feel the rings.

Fry:You'd think you'd have to freebase it.

Fry · Zoidberg · Bender:Hey, Zoidberg, get in here! Screw you! Ain't got that. Nope.

Fry:I'll be able to pack my day with twice as many humdrum activities.

Random person · Fry:Can l, like, wail on you with this two-By-Four... And it doesn't hurt you? Ow! That didn't hurt.

Fry:Stay back, or we'll beat the tar out of you using super powers! Whoo-ooah.

Bender · Fry:Hey, Fry, we've still got our costumes on. Wanna steal some more stuff? I guess. As long as you think it's right.

Fry · Amy · Hermes:It wasn't me, Mr. F. It was Amy. / Stop it, Amy! You stink! / You know you did it!

Fry:Thanks. These aren't pockets, they're just flaps. I put my money in my sock.

Fry:They're onto me!

Fry · Morris:Bring beer. / No beer till you finish your tequila!

Fry · Zoidberg:Delivery boy, Phillip J. Fry, reporting for duty. Dr. Zoidberg, soaking in brine.

Fry:I can't work under these conditions, without me there is no mission. I AM the mission!

Team · Fry:We're back from the mission. Wha, what? You went without me?

Fry · Leela:I'm really sorry I missed the mission. - I wasn't there, you might have needed me. - Nope. - But if I'd been there, I... - Nope. - Look ... - Nope. - Bender is great. - Nope.

Fry:It's just that, the kind of importance I have... it doesn't matter if I ... don't do it.

Fry:There are guys in the background of Mary Worth comics who are more important than me.

Bender · Fry:What do you want to do? And I mean anything! You have the power. Name it and I'm there. You're the man. Well...OK. Let's go bowling. No.

Fry:Wait! I'm trying. It weight as much as a thousand suns.

Fry · Nibbler:Are you my mommy? Negative.

Fry:Aren't you a fuzzy wuzzy wittle guy.

Fry:Oh! Snap!

Fry · Nibblonian:You're gonna eat that? Maybe later.

Fry:I remember the square dancing stomachs. Or that might be in the lately commercials.

Fry · Nibblonians:Because I'm so smart? Oh my!

Fry:I did do the nasty in the pasty!

Fry · Nibbler:So they try to learn things? - Right. - Those bastards!

Fry · Nibbler:Sorry, what? I wasn't paying attention. - That is most wise. - Who?

Fry:I'am at the input console. I'm a little nervous and I've got brain in my but-crack.

Fry · Brain:Is it true that post stamp glue is made of... - Correct! Toad mucus.

Fry · Brain:What really killed the dinosaurs? Me!

Fry:I can't believe how fat I look!

Fry:I wish the stupid racoons had never brought me to the future.

Fry:Just remember that Scooty-Puff, Jr. suckssss...

Fry:Did everything just taste purple for a second?

Fry:Then I am the most important person in the universe.

Fry:I'm not scared of that at all!

Fry:I often have thoughts and feelings that can only be expressed through dance!

Fry:Leela, let's turn back, there's absolutely no shame in wussing out.

Fry · Leela:Hey, what's this goop? Royal jelly. They feed it to the queen. Bees made honey and jelly? How come nothing humans make tastes good?

Fry:Help! I can't swim in jelly as far as I know!

Fry:Leela, stop bonding and let's go! I got jelly in my underpants!

Fry:I didn't mean you're all fat. It's just fatso there.

Fry · Leela:I don't want anything to happen to you. Thanks, but I can look out for myself. Frankly, I can smell danger a mile away. Look out!

Fry:This makes me the oldest member of my family.

Leela · Fry · Professor:I thought you were dead. No, I'm better than ever. Before the accident, I couldn't do this! Impressive. But it does sort of support my You-Are-Dead theory.

Fry:There is a surprise for you in my locker. I got it at Swedish novelty shop before he left.

Fry · Leela:Could a dream take you dancing in an illusion garden? Well, yes technically. But it's still very sweet of you.

Fry:Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun?

Fry:My new spleen came from a guy who liked motorcycles.

Leela · Fry:You could really use a shower. You too.

Fry:I know you've rejected me a lot before, but frankly... I wasn't sure we were right for each other either. But now I am!

Leela · Fry:I can't go out tonight... because I have sweaty boot rash! / No spluh.

Fry:Why do you think I'm sitting over here in the stink-free zone?

Fry:In my experience boxes are usually empty... or maybe with a little cheese stuck to the top. And one time, pepperoni. What a day that was!

Bender · Fry:Fry, how can you be so naive? He was joking, get it? / No. / That's what makes it so funny!

Fry:Ow! It's hot! The butter in my pocket is melting!

Fry:And unlabeled booze! Wide-mouth too!

Fry:I meant your hair. It's all different-y.

Fry:It's some guy wearing a Leela costume! Get him!

Fry · Farnsworth:Am not! / It contains a parallel universe!

Fry:Oh, wow! It's like that drug trip I saw in that movie... when I was on that drug trip.

Fry:Is that pink nail polish?

Alternate Leela · Leela · Fry:I flipped a coin. / You mean you flipped a coin too? And it was tails? / So that's why you said you had to meet that ghost!

Fry:So that's why you said you had to meet that ghost!

Fry:One year later I got beat up at a Neil Diamond concert... by a guy named Scrunchy!

Fry:So, Leela? Seeing how the universe wasn't destroyed... you wanna catch an ape fight? You know, together?

Fry:I'm gonna swim with a whale. They're the gentle giants of the deep. I'm well aware of that.

Fry:It's just 300 bucks. What is that, like 100 cups of coffee? That's it! I'm getting 100 cups of coffee, starting now.

Fry · Whale Biologist:Then why'd you become a whale biologist? I don't know you well enough to get into that.

Fry · Waitress:Yeah. I'll have a coffee. / Guppy, trout, mermaid or--? / Whale, please.

Fry:This isn't Yemeni! It's Sulawesi! The cup's shaking! I don't want my coffee shaking!

Fry:Come on, Mushu! Barf! Barf like a freshman!

Fry:Better do what he says. He's a whale biologist.

Fry:Coffee, coffee, coffee!

Fry:Bigfoot's my hero. Growing up, he was the celebrity I most identified with... Because he was a loner who hated the popular monsters yet longed to be one.

Fry:Bigfoot? You taught yourself English?

Fry:I bet you have a wounded raccoon friend... That you tenderly nurse back to health while you go: [makes sounds] In the end, they shoot you, but you teach us about things.

Fry:Why does your vanity plate say 'Probe 1'?

Fry:I don't get that gesture. Am I wrong?

Fry:I don't want to teach a new one how to shoot milk when I laugh.

Fry:My nose is an aphrodisiac? I'm gonna drop a barf.

Fry:Snarfs it and does the worm.

Fry:I guess I'll just go home and marry a skunk.

Fry · Bender:I'm usually the first guy to toot my own horn-- I'll say! Whoo! But in this case I don't think it's gonna do any good. That's what she said! Whoo!

Fry:I keep my horn as long as you two end up doing the horizontal monster mash.

Fry:Yes! I never thought I'd escape with my doodle, but I pulled it out. Just like at the movie theater! Whoo!

Fry:Who should I root for? America? Or a country I learned about at the food court?

Fry:Yeah. Isn't that basically all Jamaicans do?

Fry:Come on, Hermes! Beat that mahogany god!

Fry:That's marriage, all right.

Fry:And his respect for women is back to normal.

Fry:Sentimental dribble poop! Come on, Bender, let's go. This chick flick is getting me all barfy.

Fry:Mell out, Bender. Come watch some TV.

Fry:Oh, yeah. No, you're pretty perfect.

Fry:Whoever's directing this is a master of suspense!

Fry · Professor:What kind of bozos would start a Bender protest group? Good news, everyone! Hermes and I have started a Bender protest group!

Fry:That was uncanny.

Leela · Fry · Bender:That we should all take TV a little less seriously. And more importantly, turn it off once in a while. So should we turn it off now? Well That depends what's on.

Fry:Nothing good. Let's just keep watching.

Fry:I choose to not understand these signs.

Fry:Bender! I was just not playing the holophonor.

Fry:Sure would. Oh, well, goodbye.

Fry · Robot Devil:You sure I won't know him? Definitely probably not.

Fry:It's not ironic, it's just coincidental.

Fry:Yeah, they get around. But I'm afraid we had a deal.

Fry:So is a peacock, but you don't eat it until it's cooked.

Fry:My hands! My horrible human hands!

Fry · Robot Devil:And what did you do to my nails? I cleaned them.

Fry:except no one drew magic-marker penises on my forehead

Fry:Hey, speaking of splattered bowels, can I cook you a romantic dinner tonight, Leela?

Fry:I'm poking as hard as I can!

Fry:Maybe he's just trying to feed his family

Fry:Hey, I was nuzling that.

Fry:I love you. I mean her. Wait, help me out here.

Fry · Robot Leela:Please don't get upset, Leela. She's nothing like you. I have to go. This is just too freaky

Fry:But how do I know who's the human and who's the robot?

Fry:I'm a robot too!

Fry:Like The Pimpsons and Ass-o-rama?

Fry · Leela:You mean... How dare you.

Fry · Clerk:Adult bookstore? I thought this was the public library. No. Pubic library.

Fry:Hey, I'm proud of you, Bender... avoiding sin for almost a full minute. Bender?

Bender · Fry:We are on line. It is across town. Stop thinking, fry!

Fry:Shut up and take my money!

Fry:Screaming during eyephone installation

Fry · Bender:These eyephones are phones, too? Duh.

Fry:All I did was add a laugh track and twit it to my 10,000 followers.

Fry:Burping eggs, scratching my underarm fungus, looking for love. Send.

Fry:Can I somehow charge it to my eyephone for an additional fee?

Fry · Amy:You have 50,000 followers? I only have three. Send. / I unsubscribed yesterday.

Bender · Fry:Like this video of you doing karate in your underpants.

Fry · Bender:Since when is the Internet about robbing people of their privacy? August 6, 1991.

Fry:I'm gonna have to swim in the juice of the puke-me-poop-you.

Fry:I'm gonna have to swim in the juice of the puke-me-poop-you.

Fry:Who was that... the Queen of England?

Fry:Ew, she's Scottish.

Fry:Million-follower gross.

Fry:her dignity sac will rupture.

Fry:It's called 'Let's go already.'

Fry · Amy:I think I'm coming down with circus-itis. (Sneezes, clown horn honks) I thought circus-itis only affected children. Children of all ages.

Morbo · Fry:So, Fry, what do you do for a living? Me? Um... can I phone a friend?

Fry:I didn't come to play; I came to win. Now let's play.

Fry:B: Nail! Final answer!

Hermes · Fry:Don't you ever stop to think before you speak? I never stop to think about it.

Professor · Fry:You can barely remember your own name, Einstein. Einstein is a hard name to remember.

Fry:Don't have a shmaneurysm.

Fry:Who will hug me if I achieve something?

Fry:What turned them to stone?

Fry:Uh-oh. Nibbler died in the wall.

Fry:Well, I may not have brain smarts, but at least I have street smarts.

Fry:I was in the hospital two weeks. No one visited me.

Fry:Not even a card.

Fry:That's the great thing about that hand.

Fry:My God! This is the greatest mystery of all time.

Fry:Roman numerals?! I've got it! We're in Rome.

Professor · Fry:One... Okay, we're there.

Fry:My God! Robot Saint James is a zombie.

Animatronio · Fry:Nay, I am not Saint James. Enough of your lies, Saint James.

Fry:The what, now?

Fry:No wonder this contraption isn't aerodynamic! It's not an aircraft, it's a spacecraft!

Fry:That's what I was gonna say!

Fry:And might I say, you were great in Titanic. The Beach... eh.

Fry:Heh. Looks like eating rocks wasn't as dumb as you said.

Fry · Leonardo:How's your football team? Learned.

Fry:No. It would just go in one ear and our some other hole.

Fry:I have a terrible secret to confess, Mr. DiCaprio.

Fry:I can see myself in your shiny button.

Fry:Wait... you told me it was an unstoppable ice cream machine.

Fry:I've got one single nail, and another nail to nail it in with

Fry · Professor:That's what my mom used to say. She was a wise woman. Also that I'm not much to look at.

Fry:I can't believe it! I'm gonna die! Next Thursday...

Fry:What?! Then how come you always scream so much when you're in danger?

Fry:It may have been a fake war, but my scuffed knee is all too real.