Dr. Zoidberg reunites with his uncle, silent hologram star Harold Zoid, and the two of them set out to make a movie together. They cast the temperamental Calculon in the lead role, who demands an Oscar for his performance, but the movie doesn't go over well with audiences.
WAR
34.2
Wins Above Replacement
“Thats Lobstertainment” ranks #102 of 137 Futurama episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 74.6 — Great. The episode packs 72 scored jokes at 4.5 per minute, averaging 6.7 on craft and 6.3 on impact, with Harold Zoid landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Waiter · Harold Zoid: What can I get you? Is bread free? Yeah. We'll split an order.
Harold Zoid: Oy! Now he emotes.
Joan Rivers: I've had so many face-lifts, they finally lifted it right off my body! It's true! It's true!
Stallone: My career went down the day they invented Smell-A-Vision.
Harold Zoid: That's why you're perfect for drama!
Standout Moments
Waiter · Harold Zoid: What can I get you? Is bread free? Yeah. We'll split an order.
Harold Zoid: Oy! Now he emotes.
Joan Rivers: I've had so many face-lifts, they finally lifted it right off my body! It's true! It's true!
All Jokes — 72 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Humorbot 5.0: So I says, 'Super Collider? I just met her.'
Humorbot 5.0: And then they built the Super Collider. Thank you. You've been great.
Comedy Club Host: Our next standup's a veteran of four comedy traffic schools.
Comedy Club Host: Give it way up for Bobcat Zoidberg!
Zoidberg: Earth. What a planet. On Earth, you enjoy eating a tasty clam. On my planet, clams enjoy eating a tasty you!
Zoidberg: Maybe I'm not loud enough. On Earth, everybody is looking for a squid! On my planet...
Zoidberg Cringe/Discomfort Escalation ★ Rewatch Zoidberg: So these three parasitic worms bore into a human's head. And they walk up to the bar and then... Wait! Stop! I've got more!
Zoidberg: My whole life I worked on that act. And they hated it.
Zoidberg Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Bender: You're a crazy lobster doctor! You shouldn't be a comedian!
Zoidberg: But comedy is in my valves.
Zoidberg: My Uncle Harold was a big star back in the era of silent holograms.
Professor Farnsworth: Why, I've been a fan since back when my hips were made of bone!
Professor Farnsworth: As it happens, I still have some of my original 78s.
Zoidberg: This letter has to be very personal, so I'm writing it in my own ink.
Zoidberg Character Comedy Visual Gag ★ Rewatch Zoidberg: Norm and Sam and Sadie's boy? Remember?
Zoidberg: Now I'm the most important doctor at the company where I work.
Zoidberg Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Zoidberg: But my life is bereft of laughter.
Harold Zoid: What's that scribble-di-gook?
Harold Zoid: It's a letter from my rich nephew... who just might be my ticket out of this flophouse, he might.
Harold Zoid: Yeah, you'd better run!
Harold Zoid: P.S: cashier's check.
Tour Guide: I'm kidding. That never happens.
Tour Guide: Fox uses searchlights to blind pilots... then film the resulting plane crashes.
Tour Guide: Ahead... you'll see the home of Mel Gibson, star of the hit film Bravehead.
Calculon: Are you my hot-water heater?
Calculon: Unless you can heat water to 212 degrees, I'm not interested.
Calculon Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Bender: That was the other guy. My name's Boiler.
Bender Character Comedy Misdirection Calculon · Bender: Nice work, Boiler. Thanks. And call me Bender.
Zoidberg: Next time you see me, don't be surprised if I've eaten.
Zoidberg Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Zoidberg: Uncle Zoid! You look young enough to be thrown back.
Harold Zoid: Rich nephew! Come over here and give your uncle a nice, big meal.
Harold Zoid: So, here we are. A still-famous film comedian... And a rich, respected doctor with surviving patients. Eating in a restaurant, as we both often do.
Harold Zoid: That dream dies now! You're unfunny and untalented!
Harold Zoid: That's why you're perfect for drama!
Harold Zoid: I'll be back on top after 50 miserable years... of fame.
Harold Zoid: This film has a juicy part for you... if you completely finance it with your money.
Zoidberg: I've been here a day, and already I'm a Hollywood phony.
Fry · Bender: Since when have you been in the biz? Long enough, little man. Long enough.
Harold Zoid: Get this. For a scant $1 million investment... you can be the star.
Calculon: No. No, I don't like the font.
Harold Zoid: I can guarantee anything.
Actor: That makes sense. Wink, wink.
Actor Absurdist Meta/Self-Referential Harold Zoid: No, I didn't. Raise middle finger.
Harold Zoid: I said this is a talkie! You've got to emote more! And you extras? Wave your arms! What is this, a morgue?
Harold Zoid: Just because it's a dramatic scene... doesn't mean you can't do a little comedy. Throw a pie, for God's sake!
Harold Zoid: Editing is a long and expensive process. We spent all the money on pies, so it'll be ready Friday.
Leela · Fry: Pay the valet the 2 bucks. No! It's the principle of the thing. I see a parking lot ahead.
Harold Zoid · Zoidberg: He's a visionary! Everyone walked out. They hated it.
Zoidberg: Plagues have had better opening nights.
Harold Zoid: That's why I used the qualifier 'practically.'
Harold Zoid: That's why I used the qualifier 'practically.'
Calculon: That's the Emmy of movie awards!
Leela: Oh, my God! Sylvester Stallone!
Stallone: No, I'm not. I'm an even bigger liar than you!
Stallone: My career went down the day they invented Smell-A-Vision.
Harold Zoid: As a pathetic has-been and forgotten relic, they remember me!
Zoidberg: No! This is one death I won't be responsible for. Zoidberg away!
Joan Rivers: Here comes Jack Nicholson's DNA, reconstituted in a gorilla body!
Harold Zoid: My only marketable skill is to occupy space.
Billy Crystal: Now I know how a Pez dispenser feels.
Leela: It's some kind of hollow tube devoid of human life. The L.A. subway! We can blast our way in and escape!
Leela Observational Setup/Punchline Fry: What was that? A tar dolphin? Or a tar shark?
Fry Absurdist Character Comedy Billy Crystal: Star Trek: The Pepsi Generation. They Call Me Mr. Pibb. And Snow White and the 7 Ups.
Harold Zoid: Play along, like with Marisa Tomei.
Harold Zoid: But tonight I realize what's really important is to win two Oscars!
Harold Zoid: Why are you upset? It's less fraudulent for you to have it.
Calculon: I respect and admire Harold Zoid too much to beat him to death.
Calculon Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Party Bouncer: Oh, pardon me. I see you're with Mr. Stallone.
