The Sting

Bender · Announcer:The only sound is Bender calling everyone else a jerk as he swings! And he slices it... into the water, duh! Man!

Professor:Bad news, everyone! You're not good enough to go on your next mission.

Crew member:We live to suck another day!

Crew · Professor:That doesn't sound so dangerous. This is no ordinary honey! It's produced by vicious space bees.

Professor:And that's if you're not allergic! You don't wanna know what happens then oh no no, God no! Your insides will boil out of your eye sockets like a science fair volcano!

Crew member:I didn't want to know!

Professor · Crew:These bees are larger than most Buicks! and twice as ugly. Larger than an American sedan?

Crew · Professor:How big is the honeycomb? Honeycomb's big. Yeah, yeah, yeah! It's not small? No, no, no.

Crew · Leela:But Leela, we're no good! Listen, I'm scared too. But I'm more scared of disappointing myself.

Fry:I'm not scared of that at all!

Professor · Amy:Now, bees communicate by dancing. Like my parents! Wait! That was hitting!

Fry:I often have thoughts and feelings that can only be expressed through dance!

Leela:Bender! Quick! Waggle something!

Fry:Leela, let's turn back, there's absolutely no shame in wussing out.

Black box recording · Crew:Well I aim to prove him wrong. It'll take more than a few deadly deadly bees to... Couldn't make that out. Too much static!

Fry · Leela:Hey, what's this goop? Royal jelly. They feed it to the queen. Bees made honey and jelly? How come nothing humans make tastes good?

Fry:Help! I can't swim in jelly as far as I know!

Leela:You adorable wittle itty bitty fuzzy wuzzy...

Fry:Leela, stop bonding and let's go! I got jelly in my underpants!

Fry:I didn't mean you're all fat. It's just fatso there.

Crew member:We made it, we're alive! Burn out that old crew! The only things they did better than us were suck and die.

Fry · Leela:I don't want anything to happen to you. Thanks, but I can look out for myself. Frankly, I can smell danger a mile away. Look out!

Leela:You call that a wound? That's a boo boo tops! But thanks for trying to save me, Fry!

Bender:Who will make Bender waffles just the way he likes them now?

Professor:I'm lying to make her feel better!

LaBarbara · Hermes:Husband, can't you go anywhere without lighting something up? It's an old Jamaican accounting tradition. We burn his timecard. That way, his zombie doesn't come back looking for his final paycheck.

Amy:He looks so natural. It's funny to think he's crammed full of sawdust and preservatives.

Reverend:I barely knew Philip, but as a clergyman I have no problems telling his most intimate friends all about him.

Leela:Soothe us with sweet lies.

Reverend:It may comfort you to know Fry's death took only 15 seconds. Yet the pain was so intense that it felt to him like 15 years. And it goes without saying, it caused him to empty his bowels.

Fry:This makes me the oldest member of my family.

Amazon:Him do good snoo-snoo.

Bender:All those times, I said 'Kill all humans', I'd always whisper 'except one'. Fry was that one... and I never told him so.

Leela · Fry · Professor:I thought you were dead. No, I'm better than ever. Before the accident, I couldn't do this! Impressive. But it does sort of support my You-Are-Dead theory.

Fry:There is a surprise for you in my locker. I got it at Swedish novelty shop before he left.

Professor:Of course he still exists. As a frozen corpse in outer space! I made myself sad.

Bender:Bupkis! Well, I feel better now. Pawning all this stuff in Fry's locker helped give me closure.

Leela · Bender:Was there anything in there that might have been a gift for me? No. Nothing. Not at all. No way jose! Here it is. You took this from Fry's locker!? Hey, the guy's dead. There's no law against grave robbing!

Professor:If Fry is out there somewhere, Leela's brain could be acting like a five-pound ouija board.

Leela · Professor:Is this some sort of brain scanner? Some sort, yes. In France it's called a guillotine.

Amy:Hey! What if Fry wasn't actually dead when we buried him? You know, like Julia Roberts.

Leela · Professor:How could I have known the gift was in Fry's locker? Easy. He told you about it before he died and your grief-roasted mind blocked it out!

Leela · Professor:Are you saying...I'm going crazy? No! No one's saying that. But I'm certainly thinking it loudly.

Fry · Leela:Could a dream take you dancing in an illusion garden? Well, yes technically. But it's still very sweet of you.

Leela:It's all so beautiful. I've forgot how many hundreds of degrees below zero it must be.

Amy · LaBarbara:Quit your bragging, my boyfriend's alive too. Not anymore.

Hermes:I'm from Jamaica the show-me island, so show me you're blowing it out your fanny.

Leela:I am not under stress, damn it!

Bender:A little? You're screwier than my aunt Rita. She's a screw.

Professor:Be careful you purple haired imbecile! One spoonful calms you down. Two spoonfuls help you sleep. But three spoonfuls and you're going into a sleep so deep... you're never wake up. Never!

Leela:Oh my gosh! I'd better get a sponge!

Fry:Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun?

Bender:Neat! This is great! My buddy is alive and his credit cards are valuable again!

Zoidberg:In every life we have some trouble. But when you worry, you make it double. Don't worry, be happy! The landlord says your rent is late. You may have to litigate. But don't worry! Bee happy!

Amy · Zoidberg:Were you just singing? No. I was telling you not to worry. I'm not allowed to sing. Court order.

Leela:I'll find Fry's coffin, get his corpse and keep it under my mattress to remind me that he's really dead. That'll prove I'm not insane!

Leela:OK, I'm insane. But I'm still sane enough to know it. The only time I feel alright is in my dreams. With you. 3 spoonfuls, then...I can dream forever.

Bender:I've tried it. Bedsores hurt!

Bender:Listen to me! You don't wanna lie in bed like a vegetable and do nothing the rest of your life. I've tried it. Bedsores hurt!

Fry:My new spleen came from a guy who liked motorcycles.

Professor:Sweet three-toed sloth of ice planet Hoth! She's awake!

Amy:And he talked non-stop, like a parrot of the sea he was.

Leela · Fry:You could really use a shower. You too.