Bender uncovers the mysteries of the vast Momazon corporation.
WAR
23.3
Wins Above Replacement
“Related To Items Youve Viewed” ranks #144 of 170 Futurama episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 72.6 — Solid. The episode packs 74 scored jokes at 4.5 per minute, averaging 6.5 on craft and 6.2 on impact, with Bender landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Calculon: No, no. Line? No...!
Calculon Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Fry: Billy West? What a stupid, phony, made-up name.
Fry Meta/Self-Referential Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Clamps/Francis: Eh, four stinking years of clamping school for this?!
Defense Attorney · Bender: including a crime you made up yourself called 'burgle-arson-arceny'? That's a wholly owned trademark of Rodriguez Crime Concepts, Inc.
Professor: There'll never be another like him. Let's hire someone better.
All Jokes — 74 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Professor: Who likes good news? Everyone? Then, good news, everyone. Our next delivery isn't to some dangerous outer space planet.
Professor Setup/Punchline Misdirection ★ Rewatch Callback Fry: Earth is dangerous. I fell off my chair there once.
Fry Absurdist Deadpan/Understatement Fry Absurdist Character Comedy Professor: Long Long Island
Bender: It looks like a pair of clamps.
Clamps: These are all rusted out with snitch juice.
Clamps Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Clamps: Oh, geez, I forgot my Pope manners.
Clamps Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Space Pope: Dearly beloved, it is with great speed that I now pronounce you husband and wife.
Donbot: May I help you with some assistance?
Donbot Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Callback Donbot · Clamps: We don't got nobody here by that alias. Hey, hey, that's me.
Donbot: Your name's Francis?
Bender: You forget, Leela. I'm Bender, owner of disguise.
Bender Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Calculon: Piscopo. This guy.
Calculon Observational Deadpan/Understatement Bella · Bender: I'm the bride. Oops.
Fanny · Bender: Bender, it's me, Fanny. You who? The Donbot's wife? We had an affair?
Bender: I don't want to hit on anybody I already had sex with.
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist Bender: You're my third choice.
woman · Bender: Oh, Bender, this is all happening too slowly. Let's get married. Quiet, I'm making out with a floozy.
Bender: Hold your clapper.
Bender Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Donbot: It gives me no joy to do this, because Clamps will be doing it.
Donbot Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Calculon: No, no. Line? No...!
Calculon Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bella: And guys who mess around with his daughters. And attempt to duplicate his meatball recipe.
Bender: Says who? I didn't witness anything!
Bender: All right, Amy, you win! The mob did it. I saw the whole thing while also having hot sex with the Donbot's daughter.
Bender: I'm scared and great at sex.
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist Bender: And then I ate some excellent meatballs.
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist Callback Bender: No, no. Can I have another $50? No. No? No! No...!
Bender Callback Escalation ★ Rewatch Callback Judge 724: All rise for the Honorable Judge 724. Good day. I'd like to say I'm prepared to tolerate several if not all forms of intimidation during this trial.
Prosecutor: Your Honor, the prosecution pecks for a mistrial on the grounds of jury tampering.
Prosecutor: People call our star witness Mr. X, whose appearance will be altered be-caw-se he's in grave danger.
Bender: Aah, fix it, fix it, fix it, fix it!
Defense Attorney · Bender: including a crime you made up yourself called 'burgle-arson-arceny'? That's a wholly owned trademark of Rodriguez Crime Concepts, Inc.
Judge · Bender: You are charged with two counts of burgle-arson-arceny. How do you plead? Not inno-guilty-cent.
Bender: Wait, I'm not finished. ...o! Now I'm finished.
Bender Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Prosecutor: Your Honor, the prosecution roosts.
Jury Foreman: After a steamy 12-way deliberation, we find the accused guilty as... Wait. The Donbot is innocent.
Calculon: My personal trainer, and he's trained me to say that my wounds were self-inflicted, for you see I am a big Hollywood idiot dumb guy what does dat sort of ting.
Calculon Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential Donbot Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun woman · Bender: Honey, if you're marrying Bender, you might want to get a black dress for the wedding. That's going to look hot.
FBI Agent: You'll be given a new identity, a new place to live, and this iPod. I don't want it anymore.
Bender: Before I leave, I just want you to know I've never done any work whatsoever.
Bender: Zoidberg, I know it seems like I can't stand you.
Bender Reaction Beat Awkward Silence Bender: Me, too. I'll need a butler.
Bender Character Comedy Misdirection Professor: There'll never be another like him. Let's hire someone better.
Clamps: Yeah, and then I'll introduce him to my best friend-- clamp number one!
Clamps: Francis... Francis? I'll clamp you with the Francis!
Clamps Character Comedy Callback Callback Professor: Yeah, they all kind of broke.
Professor Deadpan/Understatement Dark/Subversive Professor: Snipping? Looks like you may be out of a job, Zoidberg.
Zoidberg: Stay off my turf!
Clamps/Francis: That guy can bite my shiny metal clamps.
Clamps/Francis: Eh, four stinking years of clamping school for this?!
Clamps/Francis: Squeezers? Squeezers?! They're clamps, you (bleep)!
Sheriff Furley: Hot diggity! You fellers want to stick around for the hanging tomorrow? It's gonna be a doozy. I sure do love hanging people.
Sheriff: I like how you didn't get drunk and steal anyone's organs, like our old robot.
Sheriff Character Comedy Callback Callback Clamps/Francis: We're in space, where no one can hear you clamp.
Clamps/Francis: I checked on a guy once. I checked him into tiny pieces!
Fry: Billy West? What a stupid, phony, made-up name.
Fry Meta/Self-Referential Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Leela: Well, my boyfriend and I were going to have sex on a burning flag, but I could have a bite.
Leela Escalation Absurdist Callback Billy West/Bender: Folks say my mama was a hoe.
Billy West/Bender: Which is weird, seeing as how my daddy was a forklift.
Amy: Wow. Bender is really committed to his new Jethrovian identity.
Amy Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy Billy West/Bender: Examine? Heck, if you can find it, you can keep it.
Fry: You sure you don't want to kill all humans?
Fry Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Billy West/Bender: I love all humans.
Fry: Francis is a way better friend than Bender ever was.
Fry Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Billy West/Bender: God bless Grandma and Grandpa... They're next!
Zoidberg: John (bleep) Zoidberg!
Zoidberg: That offer was for a limited time only.
Zoidberg Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Zoidberg: Because our friend Francis here is in reality a bad murderer.
Zoidberg Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Bella: Bender, you two-timing jerk! I put off my singing career for you!
Bella Character Comedy Escalation Donbot: Bender was a hell of a squealer. Maybe the best there ever was.
Bender: Bender? I'm-a no Bender. You got-a me-a mixed uppa with another-a robot.
Bender Character Comedy Callback Leela: So that moon hillbilly who got murdered was just an innocent husband and father.
Bender: You do, and I'll (bleep) gut you like a fish.