The Numberland Gap

Fry:Yeah, until you're defrosted and wake up refreshed, Unaware of any time having passed.

Character responding to prisoner movement:Oh, please. It's probably just the carbonite thawing slightly.

Guard character · Prisoners:While I stay here and get hooted at. (whirring) Ooh, yeah, baby! Oh, stop.

Bender:That's silicon red, the universe's greatest folk singer!

Silicon Red:Ah, still cocked.

Bender:Have you forgotten My lifelong dream of being a folk singer... Because I sure have until right now.

Fry:Hey, I have a lifelong dream too. Of not being left alone with a frozen supervillain.

Fry:Don't try anything, dr. Brutaloff! I know karate. Aye-hyah!

Silicon Red:Then I shot him and stabbed him and stole all his gold / and I tried on his face while his body turned cold

Silicon Red:Old salmonella? Son, I ought to kill you for asking.

Bender:30? You must be quite a bungling lowlife.

Silicon Red:You're the sucker, sucker. See... With all salmonella and me been through, her sound is unique.

Dr. Beeler:Using my fancy technology, I can make an exact copy of this guitar.

Dr. Beeler:I call the process 'science.'

Dr. Beeler:Whoa, that's a lot of porn.

Bender:I don't know. I mainly hang out in here.

Silicon Red:Witchcraft! Sorcerer!

Dr. Beeler:Shall we adjourn to the porn folder?

Bender:I call my new guitar bender mae because bender may be The greatest folk singer of all time!

Bender:I tell people she got it while I was doing hard time With a new hampshire chain gang.

Fry:From where dr. Brutaloff slashed me with his finger knives, Right after he thawed out of his carbonite, And right before he froze me in his carbonite Because you deserted me.

Bender:Eh, you're always getting frozen in stuff. It's your thing, man.

Bender:I claim I won it in a knife fight at j. Crew.

Bender:Actual folk songs are all public domain. Where's the money in that?

Zoidberg:But, robot, you can't just make up folk songs Like you can a medical diploma.

Bender:36% of all folk-song heroes work on a railroad And are named 'big' something.

Bender:75% of these big railroad men have bad-hearted women Who done them wrong, Usually with a smooth-talking rambler.

Bender:Somebody kills somebody, blah, blah, blah. / somebody kills somebody, blah, blah, blah

Character at folk venue:Man, all this corncob pipe smoke Is irritating my stab wounds.

Bender:I'm ramblin' rodriguez, the new greatest folk singer ever.

Silicon Red:'cause your song was insincere, boy.

Silicon Red:And don't go to prison. That's my shtick!

Bender:How can I be so bad at everything I try And still be so great?

Fry:The heartless robot is bender. The best friend is me. How can you people be so blind?

Zoidberg:Just as I now understand the ape-men of earth.

Bender:Uh, I'm looking for the wrong side of the tracks.

Big Caboose:Then you've come to the right side of the tracks.

Bender · Big Caboose:Hammer, that should be easy to rhyme. You done time in the slammer? Uh, nope. Been to alabama? Sorry. How's your grammar? Praiseworthy.

Dandy Jim or Gus:I was got drunk and ate my big toe. Can't say I miss it.

Cookie:Jiggers! I dropped my sexton in the stew.

Leela:And it's the same railroad camp. I mean, the irony is palpable.

Character after explosion:Dibs on the toes.

Big Caboose:But, bender, I never spied no bad-hearted woman.

Bender:Wow, creativity's hard work. (slurps loudly)

Big Caboose:The part where it ended. (laughs)

Fry:You've accurately portrayed the nature of my grievance.

Bender:Oh, good, I won't have To change any words.

Fry:Oh, my god, reality is infringing bender's copyright.

Amy:Oh, my god, reality is infringing bender's copyright.

Fry:I don't think so, bender. You deserted me once, and now it's your turn to 'feel the chill.' Ha!

Bender:I don't care if it's three b.M. Open up and hide me!

Professor · Fry:That doesn't sound like me. Fry? But you just-- eh, I'll figure it out later.

Professor:We got a 20 on the tin man. Toodle-oo.

Bender:He's a unique and beautiful object.

Zoidberg:I believe the correct plural is octopi.

Zoidberg:I'm sorry. 'octopuses' is also acceptable.

Leela:Think about puppies, bender, Cute, harmless, dead puppies.

Bender:What kind of lazy ending is that? I'm not gonna put that in my song.

Bender:My audience deserves better than some crappy, formulaic ending.

Bender:If I must die, Let me die in a blaze of artistic integrity.

Bender:crushed him flatter than a macbook air, lord, lord / crushed him flatter than a macbook air.

Amy:But you said making a copy of yourself Would be a lousy ending.

Bender:No, duplicate me said that.

Bender:See, I had to be sure he wouldn't try And weasel out of getting killed Like I would and did, So I created him with a tragic weakness: Artistic integrity.

Bender:So I created him with a tragic weakness: Artistic integrity.

Leela:How could we have thought a guy with integrity Was you even for a second?