Scared Screenless

Bender · Fry:They said it couldn't be done, but here we are, stealing an unlimited supply of birthday grade helium from the unsuspected moon. Um... sun.

Bender:At night it's called the moon.

Miner · Bender:Mine collapse! Mine collapse! So? Mine collapse, too.

Fry:Won't that sear our tender flesh, sealing in the juices?

Professor:You clearly weren't paying attention to what I'm about to say.

Professor:Guess what. Hell is real. Oh, good, it works. Toodle-oo!

Leela · Miners:Stop laughing. Help is on the way! In the meantime, you should sing a song to keep your spirits up.

Hermes:I'll stay here and be in charge of not dying.

Bender:Just one more fire between me and a well-earned nap.

Linda · Morbo:The heroic robot, with no concern for his own safety, has bravely charged back into the mine. What else is on?

Bender:I am? Huh, I always strongly suspected I was one of those.

Reporter · Bender:An actress? A celebrity chef? Stay tuned for the next 14 rescues. 14?

Morbo:Morbo is not weeping. He has a... a parasite in his eye.

Mayor:But we only have the one medal. So please direct all your admiration to the main guy-- Bender! Now, you two step aside.

Woman · Mayor:My baby's in that podium! Somebody call the fire department! There is no fire department. I sold it to pay for Bender's medal.

Nixon:These boys must have hero in their bones. And you, ma'am, must have heroine in your veins.

Bender:Bite my shiny metal axe!

Leela:Zoidberg, quit turning us on and go polish your nozzle.

Bender:Yo! Hero in the house. I just got back from my daily medal strut.

Amy · Leela:The locations form a perfect shape of some kind. No! Bender was at every one of those places right before the fire started.

Crew:Oh, I don't know. Possible, feasible. I don't know. Seems like maybe. Who knows? Maybe I do. Yeah, probably.

Fry:He would never burn something down to get attention. For insurance money? Yes. Revenge? You bet. To give an autumn night that crisp chestnutty smell? Absolutely. But not for fame, women or thrills.

Bender:Hey, guys, it's me, Bender. The famous, sexy, thrilling hero.

Bender:What do you want in that, beans or just blood?

Bender:Oh, no! Surprisingly, a fire has broken out at the meat market where I am! We'll be there right away. Yeah, don't trouble yourselves. This is just a one-hero fire.

Reporter:Scoop Chang, New New York Magazine, Kosher Recipes Editor, iPad Edition.

Woman:Well, I was shoplifting a lamp chop when suddenly fire erupted from the liver tray.

Leela:We can have four idiots and a fat guy, but no arsonists.

Bender:How could a fire learn to talk? Did you burn up a dictionary? Or a parrot?

Flame Being:A billion years ago, I attempted to overthrow the democratically elected alderman from my district.

Bender:Get to the point, Flame-O.

Bender:You're huffin' for a snuffin', boy!

Flame Being:Once I make my way there, your planet will go micro-nova and become a miniature sun, with me as its Supreme Alderman.

Flame Being · Bender:Sooner or later, a polar bear will happen by. A nice, flammable polar bear. Polar bears don't burn. I've tried many times.

Fry · Bender:No, free. But it's got ads on it. That seems fair.

Fry:I know you would never set a fire that would endanger your own valuables.

Fry:That's not a flame creature. It's your pilot light.

Fry:Stupid Bender. Liar, liar, pants on fire.

Crew member:It's like the flame has a mind of its own! It's deaky! Freaky deaky!

Leela:What kind of coffin do you want?!

Fry:All the lava in the world won't wash away your lies.

Bender:I guess some grown men just don't like being carried.

Bender:Yes! Suck it, Gilgamesh!

Amy:Praise Gilgamesh!

Fry:I guess a welding torch is no way to catch a rat.

Bender:Fry did it?! Ow! You're a horrible person! And your carelessness nearly cost the life of my best friend. You.