Bender becomes a matador in the sport of "Bug Fighting."
WAR
52.1
Wins Above Replacement
“Beauty And The Bug” ranks #92 of 170 Futurama episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 77.5 — Great. The episode packs 75 scored jokes at 4.1 per minute, averaging 6.8 on craft and 6.5 on impact, with Bender landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Leela · Calculon: But, Calculon, you can't kill yourself. I'm a celebrity. I can kill anyone I want.
Calculon: I must perform the ultimate death scene. I shall drink the actual poison and actually die.
Bender · Leela: No digital camera can capture the warmth and grain of good old film. How can you even tell? Your eyes are digital cameras.
Professor Farnsworth: The ego and the id are connected not physically, like decent, God-fearing Earth lichens, but by quantum entanglement.
Bender: Wait. Say that again, but say, 'Tremendous consequences.'
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist All Jokes — 75 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Calculon: you're no doubt curious as to why I tricked you all into hang gliding here. Close-up. It seems someone in this room is a murderer.
Calculon: It's me. But the real question is, which of you is the victim? And that secret I shall take to my grave.
Bender: Now, that's acting. Calculon really Shatnered the hell out of that scene.
Bender Wordplay/Pun Observational ★ Rewatch Fry: Hey, anyone want to go to the aquarium? They got a new non-biting otter.
Fry: Wow. Aquariums have really changed since I was a boy and no one ever took me to them.
Fry Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Leela: There isn't any. The water's held in place by gravity fields so there's nothing for kids to smear yogurt on.
Leela Observational Absurdist Professor Farnsworth · Bender: I wouldn't, but I'm smart. Ahhh! Help. Police. Neat.
Bender: Hang on, I need a tripod. Let me just extend the old third leg.
Bender Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Bender: Ooh, yeah. That's stable, baby.
Bender: They Live lens? Eh... So-so. Twilight Zone one-minute-in-the-future lens?
Bender Observational Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Amy: Film? Who uses film? We've had digital cameras for a thousand years.
Amy Observational Absurdist Bender · Leela: No digital camera can capture the warmth and grain of good old film. How can you even tell? Your eyes are digital cameras.
Bender: You're looking at the last chemical darkroom in existence.
Bender: Yo, Calky! I'm a big fan, and I've got a big camera.
Bender: Try one where you're pretending to swing a tennis racquet.
Bender: Over here, Calculon! Come on, smile. Quit blinking. Red eye. Blurry. Lens cap's still on.
Bender Escalation Physical/Slapstick Calculon: At last, we can enjoy our studio-mandated quality time.
Calculon: Argh! I can't not work like this. I'll be in my day-off trailer.
Bender: And I took this one inside the ichthyosaur's stomach. Man, I've never had anyone try so hard to digest me.
Bender Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Bender: Yeah, but a true photo buff wouldn't even use these for toilet paper. Not if curtains were available.
Bender Escalation Deadpan/Understatement Dr. Zoidberg: Us People Magazine? That's total trash. Total celebrity trash. My inquiring organ wants to know.
Bender: I have no time for such foolishness.
Bender Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Bender: Well, I changed my mind and came to Hollywood after all.
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Editor: In fact, you might just have what it takes to be a paparazzo. Namely, a camera.
Editor Setup/Punchline Deadpan/Understatement Bender · Editor: Wait, a what's-a-whatzo? A paparazzo. You know, a celebrity photographer.
Bender · Editor: Hmm, I don't know. How much will it cost me? You misunderstand, Bender. We'll pay you.
Bender: Sir, you just hired yourself a new what's-a-whatzo.
Bender: Nice to meet you. And even though it's only my first day, I want you all to know that I'm already better than you. Stay out of my way!
Bender Character Comedy Escalation Dr. Zoidberg · Bender: Only a documentary about the greatest actor in the world. Ah, yes, Calculon. No, not that scene-chewing ham.
Documentary narrator: He's raked in seven Academy Awards for best actor and two for best actress, all without ever removing his trademark bag.
Documentary narrator: Langdon Cobb's acting is always in the bag.
Bender: Once again, television has given me a reason to live.
Bender Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Bender: One 60-foot ladder, please.
Bender Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Bender: What are you, some kind of attack fungus? Or just a moldy schnauzer?
Bender Setup/Punchline Observational Bender: Oh, God, please let this tacky Hollywood mansion have the obligatory... Yes! Tuscan-inspired pergola!
Bender Observational Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Bender: Peace out, Portobello.
Bender: Wait. Say that again, but say, 'Tremendous consequences.'
Bender Character Comedy Absurdist Bender: I swear on my honor as a paparazzo.
Bender: Hmm... He looked at the photo and that happened. But it could just be a coincidence.
Bender Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy Bender: The evidence is mounting. Although two times hardly establishes a pattern. I'd feel more comfortable raising the alarm if I were a little more certain.
Bender Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Hermes: Hey, how'd those two get deflated? They looked at this.
Hermes Reaction Beat Deadpan/Understatement Bender: That proves it. Looking at this photo of Langdon Cobb has a horrific effect on living creatures.
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Bender · Dr. Zoidberg: Hey, Zoidberg, look at this photo of Langdon Cobb. What, a picture of Langdon Cobb? Now, this I want to see as clearly as possible.
Professor Farnsworth: They're attention parasites. They feed on the admiration of their prey. Just like the noble buffalo.
Leela: Nothing like a buffalo.
Leela Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Leela · Professor Farnsworth: So the picture robbed them of their souls? Souls? Don't be ridiculous. It's their life forces that have been stolen. It's scientific.
Professor Farnsworth: That's why the robot's immune. He has no soul. Life force!
Bender: If we poke a hole in Cobb's bag, will they spew out like a volcano built on an Indian graveyard?
Professor Farnsworth: The ego and the id are connected not physically, like decent, God-fearing Earth lichens, but by quantum entanglement.
Fry: Let's just give up and go to the aquarium again.
Fry Character Comedy Callback Callback Bender: All right, let's go. It'll be just like stomping a puppy.
Bender Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Zoidberg: Look, I own words that are helpful.
Professor Farnsworth: Quiet, Zoidberg. God, I wish you were a husk.
Calculon: Lo, the worm has turned.
Calculon: He beats me out for every award, every role, every paternity suit.
Bender: That's Romeo and Juliet, dummy, by Will.i.am Shakespeare.
Calculon: Food coloring? The most poisonous substance known to robots?
Calculon: I must perform the ultimate death scene. I shall drink the actual poison and actually die.
Leela · Calculon: But, Calculon, you can't kill yourself. I'm a celebrity. I can kill anyone I want.
Bender: I always come in stinky.
Bender Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Bender: Whoof! I beg to differ.
Professor Farnsworth: It's going totally Kanye.
Bender: There's a humungous fungus among us.
Bender: At least he died knowing I was great.
Bender Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Professor Farnsworth: It just has to warm up for about 15 minutes.
Langdon Cobb: Aw! Did you miss me, pookie?
Bender: Eh... Contrast is a little off on this one.
Bender Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Bender: This one is really good. But I can still do better.
Bender Character Comedy Escalation Leela: Oh, God, just kill us already.
Leela Reaction Beat Deadpan/Understatement Leela: Oh, God, just kill us already.
Leela Reaction Beat Observational Bender: Oops! Nonetheless, I finally nailed it.
Bender Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Langdon Cobb: It doesn't work that way, you imbecile. Although it's really quite a nice portrait. The contrast is exquisite. And the composition sublime.
Langdon Cobb · Bender: I look spectacular. Aw, man. My great photo only made his ego bigger.
Leela: I got to admit, this time, it'll be a pleasure to be in your picture.
Leela Character Comedy Callback Callback Bender · Everyone · Bender: Say, 'Bender is great.' Bender is great! Neat.