All The Way Down

Mom:Shoot anyone who doesn't obey hard enough.

Mom:Stop gaining knowledge, Hubert.

Zoidberg:It's not a duffel bag. It's my apartment!

Mom:You need an alien hacked to pieces, he's the best there is... in the budget category.

Mom:There's nothing unethical about covert biological weapons research. I said relax!

Zoidberg:What?

Fry:So my efforts to establish diplomatic relations with the Cactus People were doomed from the start.

Zoidberg:So you're in pain and have a bunch of needles? I prescribe acupuncture. Let's begin.

Fry:Blood?! I mean... blood. Put it back in me!

Zoidberg:He's developed Simpson's Jaundice. Ay carumba.

Amy:And I can't even find my own uterus.

Leela:You just had to stop cutting my spine when I yelled 'Stop, you're cutting my spine!'

Fry:My body rejected your liver, and now I've got Garfield Syndrome. Oh, I hate Mondays.

Zoidberg:Wait. I say, 'Yes,' and you say, 'I couldn't limbo before.' You ruined the joke, Hermes.

Fry:My jaundice has progressed to Muppet Gangrene! It's not easy being gangrenous.

Zoidberg:Yeah, but did you ever play Jenga? Sometimes you pull one and...

Zoidberg:What started out as a pleasant afternoon of drugs and surgery has not gone as planned.

Pilot:Might I suggest you jump out the door and poop yourselves?

Professor:That's funny, like a crazy old man. But you know what's not funny? Deadly Tritonian hypermalaria.

Soldier · Other Soldier:Wow, he must've been a total Zoidberg. It was Zoidberg.

Doctor:Not you, though. You'll make a complete recovery and go on to marry a supermodel!

Soldier:What?! Supermodel!

Professor:Your mistake is being humans.

Professor · Scruffy:No, if I'm going to fire anyone, it'll be Scruffy. You can't do that! Over my dead body!

Bender:Thanks to Dr. Scissorhands, I wet myself every time I laugh. It's not funny! Well, I guess it is kind of funny. Uh-oh.

Professor:Long ago, Zoidberg and I entered into a secret arrangement relating to certain extraordinary events too horrible to reveal. So there's nothing to be curious about.

Zoidberg:Never! Zoidberg doesn't abandon a friend, apparently.

Zoidberg:Crunch all you want. I'll make more.

Leela · Professor:We don't know why the Professor keeps you around here, and we don't care. You're a terrible doctor! Nobody wants to see you ever again! Dr. Zoidberg! I want to see you right now!

Bender:I lost my virginity... during the film, so I'm... a little fuzzy on the details.

Zoidberg · Professor:Is this one of those 'no means yes' deals? Yes and no.

Professor:So you must murder me completely by surprise.

Professor:Not surprising enough.

Zoidberg:I was only trying to kill the Professor.

Professor:Great Little Caesar's ghost.

Leela:Oh, no, he sand-crabbed out.

Mom:Then I'll take it.

Amy:Also, the salad's ready.

Zoidberg:He doesn't have hypermalaria, you idiots. He has yeti-ism.

Zoidberg:Don't lecture me about alien physiology, Conrad.

Amy:My God, he's like some kind of believable Hulk.

Zoidberg:I'll be damned, it did make him a double-yeti.

Zoidberg:I was going to tan... once