Raging Bender

Professor Farnsworth:Good news, everyone! I've taught the toaster to feel love.

Hermes:Hermes liked it so much he decided to stay.

Bender:Hermes has all the fun. He's got a Brain Slug on his head!

Amy:Switch to a garlic shampoo.

Hermes:Walk around not wearing a helmet.

Amy · Leela:Sounds great, Hermes! Whatever you say.

Fry:Let's ditch him and go to the movies.

Bender:I hate subtitles. Alien films are so pretentious.

Dr. Zoidberg:Planet of the Clams. About an upside-down world where lobster is slave to clam.

Fry:Who invited you?

Concession worker:For 25 cents less, get a super small.

Bender:Give me a large diet malt liquor and a popcorn with extra motor oil.

TV announcer:Glagnar's Human Rinds presents: This Week in the Universe.

TV announcer:C. Randall Poopenmeyer

TV announcer · Miss Universe:Miss Universe Gladys Lennox entertains troops fighting to wipe out the human race. Go get 'em, boys!

TV announcer:technical melting

Movie patron · Bender:Mind taking your head off? - I need it to watch the movie.

Bender · Amy:Ask Flabby here to describe it to you later. She is as the factory made her. They should have stopped about halfway through.

Calculon/TV:If you want Calculon to race to the battle in his Hover Ferrari, press 1. If you want Calculon to double-check his paperwork, press 2.

Calculon/TV · Bender:You have pressed 2. - I didn't! - I'm almost positive you did.

Movie patron · Bender:Pardon me, sir. But you seem to be kicking my seat. - That's the gist of what I said. Would you mind?

Movie patron:Sir, I challenge you to fisticuffs.

Commissioner:Cripes! The Masked Unit! You knocked him out cold!

Bender:You should see me at funerals.

Bender:Float like a float-bot, sting like a stinging machine!

Amy:Two robots enter, one robot leaves. The other leaves after being declared the winner.

Amy:I'm pretty sure I did. Yes, definitely.

Bender:Oh, again with the orphanarium.

Leela:This is more important than that marble-eating contest.

Young Leela:But I can beat these dorks with one eye closed.

Master Funog:No girl has the will of a warrior. You have the will of a housewife. At best, the schoolmarm.

Master Funog:The winner? Me! Rematch? You lose again! Had enough? I thought so!

Bender:She's right. I don't want to end up like her!

Bender:Still can't reach!

Announcer:From Mom's Friendly Robot Factory in America's heartland, Mexico

Hermes · Bender:I got you a Bender hat. - Wow! Thanks, Hermes! I... Hey, cut that out!

Clear Cutter:You can't hit what you can't see.

Leela:Quit scratching your ax-hole and get back.

Clear Cutter:He's not dead! What's up?

Clear Cutter:Ultimate Robot Fighting is a scam. Keep it under your head. But the most popular robot always wins.

Bender:Whoo-hoo, I'm popular!

Clear Cutter:You're pure lowest common denominator.

Bender as 'The Offender':I'm just an ex-con trying to go straight and get my kids back.

The Foreigner:I'm not from here! I have my own customs! Look at my crazy passport!

The Chain Smoker:I love smoking. And after I win the fight, I'm headed straight to your favorite restaurant.

Bender:Well, I need floozies. Let's roll.

Bender:Those morons! I said peaberry, not sandalwood!

Commissioner · Melissa:The Gender Bender! The most unpopular fighter since Sergeant Feces Processor.

Fry:I thought it was real, like pro wrestling. But it's fixed, like boxing.

Bender as Gender Bender:I'm a real toughie.

Leela:Not Funog! Let's hit the gym. I'll teach you to fight like a girl!

George Foreman:My memory is not so good, but I think the Earth was destroyed.

Announcer:A bet of $0 on Bender pays $1000 if he wins. Still, very few takers.

Bender:Got it. Large kickle, hold the tickle.

Professor:Just let me put on my reading glasses. Why, Zoidberg! There's a lovely photo of you in here!

Announcer:the gizmo from Pismo Beach!

Destructor:Final boarding call for Flight 406, non-stop service to pain.

George Foreman:It's a good time to bring up my new grill. With its patented design, the fat drains directly into my mouth.

Leela:You're just controlling him like a puppet. I mean, cheating in a fake fight. That's low.

Master Funog:See you in girl hell! I'll be in boy hell, much nicer.

Rich Little as Howard Cosell:Interesting side note: As a head without a body, I envy the dead.

Fry:Poor little guy starved to death.

Leela:But I beat up someone who hurt my feelings in high school.

Commissioner:Here's a card good for 10% off at Bed Bath & Beyond.

Hermes:That he did surely not.