Neutopia

Professor:And we're out of business. Good news. We're back in business. We've been hired to deliver an envelope.

Professor:You're the finest crew I've had the honor to work with. Oh, my. We're being foreclosed upon. You're all terrible and incompetent.

Bender:And... boned.

Fry · Leela:Leela, Amy, pack us a lunch for our new lives under the bridge, while us men reminisce and smoke some stogies. We are not packing lunches, you walking beer commercials.

Leela · Fry:Remember Fry's idea to offer free delivery? It got us a lot of customers. We're a delivery company.

Amy:We should become a commercial airline. I mean, we've got a ship, and teleporters won't be invented for another 15 years, according to that guy from the future.

Fry:Wow. That's actually a really good idea, for a woman.

Amy · Professor:Girls of planet express calendar. Girlie calendar? Great idea, Amy.

Professor · Leela · Bender:All female employees must pose nude if requested. That's discriminatory. No, it's in all our contracts. Here's mine. All female employees must pose nude if requested. Sounds fair.

Hermes:Now that's what I call fine print.

Leela:Look, I agree it'd make spacewalking more comfortable. But for a photo shoot, it's a little... Unsavory.

Bender:Time is money, peaches. Now shut your com-link and make love to the camera. And remember, I'm the camera.

Bender · Amy:Stop actually washing and play with the sponges. But the ship is dirty. Eh, whatever. I ran out of film an hour ago.

Professor:A three month calendar? What is this, mercury?

Professor · Amy:Fortunately, I came up with a brilliant idea to save Planet Express. We'll turn it into a commercial airline. But that was my idea. Then you should have talked louder.

Leela · Professor:There. It was hard work, but it beats posing in demeaning, skimpy modeling outfits. Ladies, here are your demeaning, skimpy stewardess outfits.

Fry · Leela · Professor:Ladies and gentlemen, this is plane's president speaking. You put goofus and ganja in charge? I'm the only trained pilot here. Oh, please, Leela. Who ever heard of a plane with a woman president?

Fry:The local time on acapulsar is five years from now. In the event of a wormhole sending us back in time, do not kill your parents. If you are traveling with small children, help them not to kill you before not killing your own parents.

unknown passenger:I'll kill you, my friend!

Fry:So what's the deal with airline food, hmm? They offer you two choices, but they're always out of one. By the way, we're out of both choices.

passenger:Shut up and put on four episodes of The Office.

LaBarbara · Bender:Ooh, your hands are warm. For a robot.

Bender:Thanks, baby. I don't know what you're doing back here in the galley, 'cause you got a first class seat.

Amy · child passenger · Amy:Captain, we were supposed to land two days ago. Is everything... hey! Are we at the fair yet, mommy? We're not at the any place. And we're out of fuel.

Amy:Attention, passengers. Please remain seated until the plane comes to a complete crash.

Amy:Flight attendant's log: We've crash near a river of mercury on a lifeless mineral world. Supplies are low, cannibalism imminent, radio busted.

LaBarbara:All in favor of the jamocha thunderclap? That would be me. Practically no one.

Professor:We can't trust a woman's math. Count again.

LaBarbara · Professor:Leader? Fat man, you couldn't even run a bath. Well, you sure can run something-- your mouth!

Bender:Gender? Yeahs. You knows guyses, galses, in that order. Ows.

Fry:Interesting. Come on, men. Let's kill him.

Fry:Chocolate, Mac, men. The end.

alien:Which is larger, an Italian size four or an American apparel medium? How many calories are in a small green tea yogurt? Name any 12 of the desperate housewives. How was your day?

Bender · Leela · alien:Uh... men five, women less. Hey. He's lying. Obviously. That was a test to see who could lie better. The men win that round.

Fry:In your face, decumbent urinators.

Fry:Did one of you chicks change the thermostat?

alien:You will all be boiled alive, like retired circus animals

alien:And may the inferior gender burst into something. Flames, I guess.

unknown · Fry:Howdy there. You fellas need some directions? No, we're fine. Don't worry about it.

Amy · others:Oh, look! A clearance sale! What?! Where?

multiple women · Leela:It wasn't Tommy hilfijigger. It was linens 'n things! The hell it was. It was a juicy couture. I guess we all saw what we wanted to see.

Fry · Amy:So if one's got any good fart jokes, now would be the time. It's a shmundred degrees, and all we have to drink are non-diet sodas.

Amy · others:It, I forgot that amana here is a refrigerator. If we could supercharge her freon with a gas compressor, we might survive the heat and make to the cave. Hey, yeah! But the only gas compressor on this planet is inside bender's ass.

Amy:Was that a fart joke? Because I don't find those amusing. No one does.

LaBarbara · Hermes:None of your bizmarkie. What's that doo-wah in your ditty bag?

Hermes:Damn it, woman, you're making me highly selassie!

Hermes · LaBarbara:How do you live with yourself? Damn it, woman, you're making me highly selassie! Oh, don't you talk to me that way, you big, hairy Belafonte. Oh, you're cookin me back bacon. Thank you, woman. That's not back-bacon! That's your back bakin'!

LaBarbara:That's not back-bacon! That's your back bakin'!

Bender · Amy · Zoidberg · Fry · Alien:My wingwang's gone! My girls! My antennae! My kajigger! My gonopores!

Bender:Work goes fasters withouts no secondary sex characteristicses at which to hoot.

Leela:Yes, this place is like a neutered utopia. A neutopia.

Hermes · unknown:Really, what are we missing out on by not having sex right now? Well...

Fry:It's about loving, and fighting, and that rasta mcnasty we were doing last night.

Bender:Not cool, bro! Our genders are all reversed. Now I got a whatchacallit instead of a kajigger, you stupid whatchacallit!

Zapp:Well, hello from the neck down.

LaBarbara:I gotta get up five times a night to Xbox.

Hermes:For example, did you know there are more than two feelings?

Fry:O.M.G.! Being chicks is so much fun. Now when I say stupid things, guys all laugh and buy me stuff.

Leela:Ugh. What a skank.

Professor:Thank God most of our fans are huge perverts.

Fry:I don't care what parts I have, as long as they interlock with yours.

Professor:It combines the contentedness of being neutered, with the occasional sex of being not.

Borax Kid:You folks watch your genitals now.

Borax Kid:You folks watch your genitals now.