Larry is apprehensive over a guest appearance by former girl friend Roseanne and decides to see a psychiatrist. The office follows the O.J. trial.
WAR
61.6
Wins Above Replacement
“Roseanne's Return” ranks #8 of 90 The Larry Sanders Show episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 83.1 — Elite. The episode packs 52 scored jokes at 1.9 per minute, averaging 7.4 on craft and 7.0 on impact, with Larry landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Roseanne: Yeah, but the only thing I remember about sex with you in the limo is that Ben was driving.
Hank: He's always been nice to me.
Hank Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Roseanne: because it had a penis and a brain.
Roseanne Character Comedy Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch Hank: Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you got a good spot from years of hard work. Turns out all you have to do is dive into a shallow pond.
Hank Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Roseanne: Yeah, but the only thing I remember about sex with you in the limo is that Ben was driving.
All Jokes — 52 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Hank: hey now... oh, started on time
Hank Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Hank: Hank's property values complaint about living on Rockingham
Hank Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch you bumped him for faith ford.
Hey, who knew he was going to get this hot?
Larry: This is just what we needed. A sense of direction. Here we go. Hank.
Larry Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement Artie: Well, aren't you a goddamn smart fellow because it was at planet fucking Hollywood. I mean who wants to eat buffalo wings sitting next to demi Moore's torn panties from disclosure?
Artie Absurdist Escalation ★ Rewatch Larry: Oh, stop. I smell sulfur.
Larry Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Artie: She puts the supe in super model.
Artie Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Ivanka: because when they kill tuna, they kill dolphins, and dolphins are people. People of the sea.
Ivanka Absurdist Character Comedy Larry: They're fish, they're not people. Fish. The fight ends in fish.
Larry Escalation Character Comedy Ivanka: The lingerie catalog really fucked me...
Larry: The lingerie catalog fucked you?
Roseanne: Larry, you asshole, I know you're there. It's roseanne. Call me if you have the balls.
Roseanne Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Beverly: Did letterman have Tom hanks on again, or... Did Leno have the ito dancers on again?
Beverly Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Beverly: Harrison ford, Steve Martin, Michelle pfeiffer. Who else?
Fan: Are you Larry Sanders?
Larry: No.
Fan Larry Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Larry: What brings you here?
Chevy: The show get cancelled?
Larry: No, no. No, not yet.
I thought it was 19 months.
On the 12th.
Right.
Chevy: I had a fish behind my head... everybody said, 'fish? Why fish?' I don't know. Why fish?
Chevy Absurdist Character Comedy Hank: Hello, mayor. Hank Kingsley. Listen, a little problem. Easy fix.
Hank Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Phil: You could say that, uh, you live on rockingham, just a knife's throw from o.j.'s house.
Hank: Uh, no. I don't think I could do that one. That... that... that implies o.j. Is guilty.
Hank: Oh, I'm sure if you looked at all my underwear you'd find some blood there, too.
Hank Cringe/Discomfort Absurdist ★ Rewatch Hank: Yeah, well, I'm... I'm going to go out and murder someone without my shoes on. Come on, come on.
Hank Absurdist Character Comedy Hank: He's always been nice to me.
Hank Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: if o.j. Had really just admitted he was guilty from the get-go, he'd be out by now.
Larry Observational Dark/Subversive Larry: The latest DNA study now shows o.j. Didn't even gain those 2,000 yards that year.
Larry Absurdist Misdirection women married to American presidents who cheat on them with fat blonde whores
Larry Dark/Subversive Observational Larry: I flushed them down the toilet with the rest of tonight's show.
Artie: Well, let's call Dr. Reisman for a last-minute booking idea.
Artie Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Artie: Then he can produce the show, and you can come to my office, lie on my couch, and cry about your mammy.
Artie Escalation Character Comedy Artie: Soon you'll have Larry recovering a false memory of an uncle who tried to touch his pecker.
Artie Dark/Subversive Escalation Hank: Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you got a good spot from years of hard work. Turns out all you have to do is dive into a shallow pond.
Hank Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Roseanne: Tell that limp dick asshole if he wants to bump me he should have the balls to do it himself, or I'm going to come down there and beat his fat ass just the way he likes it.
I just said that I liked it.
Larry Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Artie: Perhaps you could arrange a conference call between you, Dr. Reisman, and the 12 roseannes.
Hank: You little prick!
Phil: What?
Hank: You did it! You egged my car!
Phil: What are you talking about?
Hank Phil Physical/Slapstick Character Comedy Phil: I am 100% not guilty.
Phil Irony/Sarcasm Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Phil: Fuck you, Hank. Of course I did it. Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!
Phil Escalation Character Comedy Roseanne: I can't wear this dress! I'm pregnant, you dip shit!
Roseanne Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Artie: This television show is where you are in total command, where no one gets the best of you, where you are the king.
Artie Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Roseanne: Just then, when you didn't know whether to kiss me or not.
Roseanne Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Roseanne: because it had a penis and a brain.
Roseanne Character Comedy Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch Larry: I guess I would feel competitive over... in the breast feeding area. I think that I would be there, uh, you know, nudging the child out of the way.
Larry Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: It will be 18 years before you see another one. That's what I would say.
Larry Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Roseanne: Yeah, but my show's funny.
Roseanne: Yeah, but the only thing I remember about sex with you in the limo is that Ben was driving.
Roseanne: Yeah, but the only thing I remember about sex with you in the limo is that Ben was driving.
Larry Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Artie: Damn it! Why couldn't she have done that on tonight's show? We would have had worldwide publicity.
Artie Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Larry: Dr. Reisman wanted me to run away like some little girl.
Larry Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Larry Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Top Episodes — The Larry Sanders Show
