A depressed and unhappy Hank hits on all the female guests before retreating to a hotel room for a boozy marathon with a series of prostitutes.
WAR
51.1
Wins Above Replacement
“Next Stop...Bottom” ranks #9 of 90 The Larry Sanders Show episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 82.9 — Elite. The episode packs 48 scored jokes at 2.1 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 6.9 on impact, with Hank landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Artie: Listen, I'm gonna give housekeeping 20 bucks. I mean, you won't feel a fucking thing, but they're the ones who are gonna have to suffer.
Artie Dark/Subversive Observational ★ Rewatch Artie: Shock, denial, fear, booze, boners, acceptance.
Artie Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hank: Oh, I like them small and compact.
Stage Manager: Then why don't you go fuck a Toyota?
Larry: Darlene, he's hit bottom and broke through to another bottom I know nothing about.
Larry Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hank Awkward Silence Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 48 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Artie: When you have meetings with her lawyer, always wear the same suit. That way they think it's the only one you own. They don't rape you so much on the fucking alimony.
Artie Dark/Subversive Observational ★ Rewatch Hank: That is what Chinese man say when he go to dentist. He say, 'uh-oh. Uh-oh, my tooth hurting.'
Hank Wordplay/Pun Observational Hank: Let us blow Mr. Neil Callaham's mind.
Hank Character Comedy Misdirection Hank Awkward Silence Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Hank: No, the first one kind of took the wind out of my sails.
Hank Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Larry: Do I call you Sarah or Sarah Jessica Parker? Or Sarah Jessica?
Sarah Jessica Parker: Whatever you'd like. Really.
Larry: Well, I'll call you Sal.
Hank: You know, we had Patricia Arquette on the show the other night. And she died the death of a dog.
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Sarah Jessica Parker: I have a boyfriend.
Hank: I thought we could shoot a few games. You know, I got my own cue and balls.
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Sarah Jessica Parker: Well, I have my own cue also. He's in New York, and he'll be flying in tonight.
Sarah Jessica Parker: Besides, Hank, you're old enough to be my father.
Ouch.
Hank: How old is your father?
Sarah Jessica Parker: It's Matthew Broderick. I date Matthew Broderick.
Hank: Hey, hey, no pressure. If tomorrow's better, hey, I'm fly with that. You're fly.
Larry: Oh, you hate being hit on by desperate men, too?
Mary Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Hank: I got a bottle of champagne at home with your name on it.
And what name would that be?
Brut.
Hank: Oh, I like them small and compact.
Stage Manager: Then why don't you go fuck a Toyota?
Hank: Wow, and a sense of humor.
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Hank: Wow, and a sense of humor. No one loves me. No one really cares.
Hank Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Tight little body. Your breasts.
Hank: Hank.
Assistant: Hank! Come on.
Artie: After my first wife gave me the gate, I went on a binge of sex, drugs, and 180-proof Everclear that lasted for three years.
Artie Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Artie: After my fourth divorce, I was able to squeeze the same amount of debauchery into a long weekend.
Artie Character Comedy Escalation ★ Rewatch Artie: Shock, denial, fear, booze, boners, acceptance.
Artie Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hank: Well, how much just to jack me off?
Prostitute: 150 cash up front.
Prostitute: You know, when you go to a gas station, they ask you to pay first, so it's a precedent, you know.
Prostitute: When you go to a gas station, they ask you to pay first, so it's a precedent, you know.
Prostitute: Hey, hey, hey. No. No kissing. I don't work that way.
Prostitute: Used to make cat noises when I blew him. Jeez. You kind of look like him.
Hank: Rrrr. Mmm. Woof! I'm all right. Aiiee. Arf, arf.
Hank Physical/Slapstick Cringe/Discomfort Callback Larry: Hank's not doing the show? How will we survive? Will there be a tomorrow? God in heaven, save us!
Larry Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Hank: I'm in show business, so I'm a little bit of a whore, too.
Hank Character Comedy Observational Prostitute: You calling me a whore?
Hank: I'm not calling you a whore. No, no. I'm just saying that, you know, you're different from the other wh... from the other girls.
Prostitute: One time I did this guy named... uh, what's his name? Andy Richter.
Hank: Get out.
Prostitute: God, you sidekicks are all alike.
Network Executive: A friend of mine said that he saw Mr. Kingsley sitting in a hotel bar with a prostitute.
Artie: Your friend is mistaken.
Artie: He sees a bald man with a hooker. Automatically, it's Hank Kingsley. I wasn't aware Carl Reiner's out of town.
Artie Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Hank: You only care about me because you're my agent. I pay you 10% to care about me.
Sid: 7½%, you cheap bastard.
Hank Sid Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Sid: You've been married to the same lady for 56 years. I'm thinking of getting out.
Sid Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Helen: I did him once. In 1956. It was only the one time. Now we're dear, dear friends.
Helen Character Comedy Observational Larry: Darlene, he's hit bottom and broke through to another bottom I know nothing about.
Larry Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Raoul: Great show last night. You were really funny, as always. Hold on. What's your name? Raoul.
Raoul Hank Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Hank: And that is the effect, apparently, that I'm having on the American fucking viewing public!
Hank Character Comedy Escalation Artie: Raul Julia was here?
Hank: Raoul the waiter.
Artie: This is a Beretta 9mm Centurion. You just pick that baby up. It'll do the job for you.
Artie Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Artie: Listen, I'm gonna give housekeeping 20 bucks. I mean, you won't feel a fucking thing, but they're the ones who are gonna have to suffer.
Artie Dark/Subversive Observational ★ Rewatch Larry: No one cares because I'm the boss. The boss has no problems. Sometimes, I swear to God, I feel like I should just end it all.
Larry Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Artie: You can always blow your head off. Safety's off. Ready to go. The divorce gun.
Artie Dark/Subversive Running Gag ★ Rewatch Callback How close did Hank come to shooting himself?
Artie: Oh, that fucking baby. He started crying the second I pulled it out.
Artie Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Larry: Gosh, this brings back memories.
Larry Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement Top Episodes — The Larry Sanders Show