Lisa tries to fit in with two college students by lying about her age. She finds that the college atmosphere is perfect for her, but her lie is soon discovered and she is shunned by her fellow elementary school students. Meanwhile, Bart is diagnosed with a weakened immune system after getting bitten by a Chinese mosquito and must live in a plastic, germ-free bubble.
WAR
51.8
Wins Above Replacement
“Little Girl In The Big Ten” ranks #211 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 79.9 — Elite. The episode packs 70 scored jokes at 4.3 per minute, averaging 6.9 on craft and 6.6 on impact, with Lisa landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Bart · Lisa: Call me! The bubble makes everything shimmer and glow. You can't believe what that sunset looks like to me. That's not a sunset. That's a bird on fire.
Bart Lisa Visual Gag Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Skinner: She's the only child keeping this school accredited. Without her, we'd have to release these children back into the forest.
Skinner Absurdist Escalation ★ Rewatch Lugash · Student: Here is your cat back, good as new. I had a dog. Is cat now.
Lisa · Homer: Doogie Howser went to college when he was my age. Against my wishes!
Brunella: Well, I know a coach. But he's tough. He defected into East Germany.
Brunella Absurdist Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 70 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer Running Gag Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Gym Teacher: Don't worry. You can win them back if you stick the landing.
Brunella: Lisa, gym isn't just about encouraging fitness, it's also about exposing weakness!
Skinner: She's the only child keeping this school accredited. Without her, we'd have to release these children back into the forest.
Skinner Absurdist Escalation ★ Rewatch Brunella: Skinner, I took an oath! And by Xena, this girl's failing gym!
Brunella: Well, I know a coach. But he's tough. He defected into East Germany.
Brunella Absurdist Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Lugash: For next exercise, put hands on hips, jump out window, and go tell parents to stop wasting my time with failure child!
Lugash Absurdist Character Comedy Homer: Who wants to put on a leotard and get screamed at? Well, hookers and Spider-Man.
Homer Absurdist Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch JFK: President Kennedy appears to motivate Lisa
Lisa · JFK: Well, I can't argue with the man who wrote Profiles in Courage. Yes. Uh, I wrote it.
Lisa · JFK: Thanks! I'll see you in heaven! Uh, yes, uh, heaven.
Lisa JFK Dark/Subversive Awkward Silence Lisa · Homer: Ich bin ein gymnast. Aw, she must've dreamt about Hitler again.
Grampa: Two ration stamps and an artillery shell full of oleo!
Grampa Character Comedy Observational Grampa: Liberace action figure. Party tonight at Roddy McDowall's.
Grampa Absurdist Character Comedy Bart: A mosquito? How'd that get in there?
Bart Setup/Punchline Absurdist Lugash: Laziness is counter-revolutionary. Questions are decadent! Fast hands mean less whipping.
Lugash Character Comedy Absurdist Homer: Skeeter bites are good luck. Scratch it and you get a wish.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy Bart · Homer: I don't feel so good. Can you take me to the hospital? Finally we're doing something I want to do.
Lugash: Just relax. Think of floor as full of snakes. You fall, they kill you! Relax, relax. And snakes!
Lugash Absurdist Character Comedy Lugash · Student: Here is your cat back, good as new. I had a dog. Is cat now.
Lugash: God give you greatest gift. Big head like beach ball made of bone. Gives you perfect balance.
Lugash Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Lugash: Rest your giant head. I am Lugash.
Lugash Character Comedy Running Gag College Students: You're reading Gravity's Rainbow? Re-reading. Sorry. What are you guys talking about? I was making fractals.
Student · Lugash: I had a dog. Is cat now.
Lisa: Of course. Where do you think I go? Baby school?
Lisa Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Lugash: See you tomorrow, Lisa! We find out what five minus three is!
Lugash Absurdist Character Comedy Lugash: Why do people run from me?
Lisa: And they don't have a Blue's Clue. Whoops. Gotta age it up. Life sucks. Totally.
Lisa Character Comedy Observational Lisa: Well, Bart's kind of... No!
Lisa Reaction Beat Cringe/Discomfort Tina: Who's Mom? That's what we call the gay guy who lives with us.
Tina Misdirection Observational Homer: I take a whiskey drink I take a chocolate drink And when I have to pee I use the kitchen sink I sing the song that reminds me I'm a urinating guy!
Homer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Homer: It can't be mange. I just had him dipped.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Bart: Contagious? Outrageous! I got me some teachers to lick.
Bart Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Bart: I don't like how many times you said 'normal.'
Bart Observational Meta/Self-Referential Bart · Marge: Help me! You'll get the hang of it, honey. Today's just a little gusty.
Carrie: She'd have to be where she lives. That place had a Manson Family vibe.
Carrie Dark/Subversive Observational Bart: My bubble, my rules.
Bart Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Homer: That is called parenting. I'm going to Moe's.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy MC: Now open your minds for the Coltrane of the quatrain, the Tony Danza of the A-B stanza.
Pinsky · Lisa: I just checked out at Atherton Library! I study there! Say another building!
Lisa: I'm in a coffee house listening to poetry. There's a cat on a table and no one seems to care. This is the single greatest day of my life!
Lisa Character Comedy Observational Pinsky: So I'm walking by the Oval Office. And I hear the President, 'Pinsky, where's my poem?' Well, I thought it wasn't due till Tuesday. So I make one up. I am just pulling stuff out of my ass.
Lisa: You won't eat our meat but you glue with our feet.
Lisa Observational Wordplay/Pun Lisa: Lisa Simpson, master of the double life.
Lisa Meta/Self-Referential Character Comedy Martin: You're like my mommy after a box of wine.
Martin Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jimbo · Martin: Give me your lunch money! But it's after lunch. It's just an expression. Like 'kick your butt' could involve no kicking whatsoever.
Bart: Never fear, the sphere is here!
Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Bart: When nerds are in trouble, I am not slow. It's spin, spin, spin, and away I go!
Bart Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Martin: Once he's gone, they'll kill us!
Martin Dark/Subversive Observational Homer: That young adult is Lisa! She's up to something private! Let's go spy on her!
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Professor: Yes. And birds go 'tweet.' What else?
Homer: What about Lisa? She's only eight!
Homer Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy College Student: I can't believe I cheated off an eight-year-old.
College Student · Elderly Person: She's worse than that 80-year-old who pretended to be a freshman. I just wanted a place to sit down.
Lisa · Homer: Doogie Howser went to college when he was my age. Against my wishes!
Homer: I put those Cathys on the fridge for you. I don't even like them. They've gotten so smutty.
Homer Observational Character Comedy Marge · Homer: Homer, Cathy is a woman. Oh, come on... You're right.
Nelson · Lisa: Hey, Einstein. What's a million plus a million? Two million. So?
Groundskeeper Willie · Lisa: Don't let them get to you, lass. I'm too good for this place, too. Now run home to your shack. I live in a house. Well, la-dee-da, college girl!
Homer: I was trying to throw Bart over the roof and he got stuck in this tree.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Bart · Lisa: Call me! The bubble makes everything shimmer and glow. You can't believe what that sunset looks like to me. That's not a sunset. That's a bird on fire.
Bart Lisa Visual Gag Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Bart: To-may-to, to-mah-to.
Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Bart · Lisa: All you gotta do is play a prank on the principal. Well, I can't do it tomorrow. There's an assembly in his honor.
Lisa · Bart: Ew! Bart! It wasn't me.
Lisa Bart Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Skinner: Did they have to guess the date of my death?
Skinner Dark/Subversive Observational Skinner: When I was starting out, they said, 'You're good. But are you 'plaque' good?' Well, today I can say, 'Yes, I am.'
Skinner Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Grandpa: Yeah, I got a question! How dare you wear white?
Skinner: Now normally I wouldn't go near a giant chocolate cake in my dress polyester. But with Bart Simpson safely encapsulated, I'd be delighted to pose.
Skinner Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Skinner: I've been taken down a peg. A whole peg!
Skinner Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Bart: Does this thing suck or blow? Suck!
Bart Physical/Slapstick Visual Gag Top Episodes — The Simpsons
