You Kent Always Say What You Want

Bart · Homer:Make room for Jumbo. - What'd you say? - Nothing.

Bart · Homer · Lisa:Praise the Lord. - Watch your mouth, you little smart-ass. - Yeah, Bart.

Homer · Bart:Why, you little... [Homer presumably strangles Bart as photo is taken]

Marge:American Applesauce Association?

Marge:We're going to have to run. There isn't even time to stretch my quads. My quads! Every stride is a nightmare!

Bart:Dentist? You said we were going to ride dirt bikes around the cemetery.

Marge:Oh, Bart, you fall for that every six months.

Homer:Why the cemetery, I wondered, but my dreams were too strong.

Homer:Absolutely. All the time. I go to the floss store and they're like, 'Whoa, there he is again.' 'Cause I buy so much floss.

Homer:I know, but a breeze from the window went in my mouth.

Homer:I don't even have a special tooth problem! This is just a routine checkup!

Homer:Oh, the bib is choking me!

Rapper in dental video:Damn, baby got bacteria.

Rapper in dental video:Luda-Crest.

Lisa:This film is against tooth decay, but it also kind of glamorizes it.

Homer · Lisa:This is the greatest movie ever. - Dad, that's Ludicrous! - I have a right to my views. - No! I mean Chris 'Ludacris' Bridges,

Bart · Lisa · Homer:This is the greatest movie ever. / Dad, that's Ludicrous! / I have a right to my views. / No! I mean Chris 'Ludacris' Bridges, right here in the dental plaza!

Ludacris:Expect a letter from Cap In The Ass Productions and its head legal counsel, Ms. Melissa Burlingame!

Homer:So you're saying I should do your job for you, at home, for free. You wish.

Bart · Skinner:Good afternoon, Principal Stinkface. - Dr. Bart.

Bart:Uh-oh, I'm feeling a lot of cooties down there. We may need to replace a tooth.

Homer · Ice cream server:What the hell is a fundae? - It's a sundae that's fun.

Homer:Snickles, Gooey Bears, Charlottesville Chew, Nice 'N' Many, Kat Kit, Herschel's Smooches, Mrs. Bad Bar, and Mi Dudes.

Kent Brockman:Of course that has nothing to do with the fact that this station and the ice-cream company are owned by the same corporation, but I digress.

Homer:I've never been to war, but I imagine it feels just like your first kill.

Bart · Homer:It won't come off. - Where's the hammer?

Kent Brockman:I said a word so vile it should only be uttered by Satan himself while sitting on the toilet.

Stranger:Oh, God, no, I get my news from the Internet like every other normal person under 70. Farewell, dinosaur.

Grampa:'booby,' 'tushie,' 'burp,' 'fanny burp,' 'water closet,' 'underpants,' 'dingle-dangle,' 'Boston marriage,' 'LBJ,' 'Titica,' 'hot dog,' or 'front lumps'!

Lisa · Bart:You mean there are losers who spend all day watching TV looking for stuff to complain about? - Who'd be lame enough to do that?

Ned:Smallville... super dog licks himself. That definitely goes in the naughty pile.

Ned:60 Minutes... Morley Safer has questionable pants fold.

Ned:The L Word... Used the 'L' word.

Ned:Imploring people I never met to pressure a government with better things to do to punish a man who meant no harm for something nobody even saw. That's what I'm doing.

Rod/Todd · Ned:Daddy, we think you need a new mommy. - First things first.

Arnie Pye:Even the map thinks you stink, Kent.

Kent · Newshound:Looks like Newshound, the Channel Six mascot, is gonna have to go without his lazy-eye surgery. - Sorry, boy. - No, I'm over here. Over here!

News Anchor · Newshound:Looks like Newshound, the Channel Six mascot, is gonna have to go without his lazy-eye surgery. Sorry, boy. No, I'm over here. Over here! I got a treat for you. Oh! Now he's gonna starve.

Krusty:I'm a cat walking down the street, swinging my arms. Look, a lady made of dynamite! Wait, I don't know that yet.

TV Executive:Damn that Brockman! There are only two rules in TV: don't swear, and don't whip it out. It's not rocket science.

TV Executive · Kent:Say, what's that powder in your coffee? Is it cocaine? - No, it's Splenda. - Spare me your slang, pusher man. You're fired!

Marge · Homer:That's because you're sitting on me, you lummox! - Kent Brockman!

Homer:Did you know that every day Mexican gays sneak into this country and unplug our brain-dead ladies?

Lisa · Bart · Homer:Dad, you barely go to work at all. - And you're constantly flouting the law. - I'm willing to change my mind and that makes me great.

Homer:Apu sang a song. What are you gonna do?

Kent:Fox deliberately runs shows that will earn them huge fines which are then funneled through the FCC straight to the Republican party.

Kent:they could spoon on a twin mattress and still have room for Ted Koppel.

Kent:Now, like toothless babies, they suckle on the sugary teat of misinformation and poop it into the diaper we call the 6:00 news.

Fat Tony:I could Dracula bite him.

Fat Tony:Every order is half this, half that, it's confusing!

Homer:For years now, Fox has been... programming shows that the whole family can enjoy.