In a parody of "24," the school's Counter Truancy Unit tries to stop three sixth-graders planning to disrupt the school bake sale with a stink bomb.
WAR
26.1
Wins Above Replacement
“24 Minutes” ranks #502 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 71.5 — Solid. The episode packs 60 scored jokes at 4.3 per minute, averaging 6.7 on craft and 6.2 on impact, with Lisa landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Lisa: As you're dying, jam the blades with your spine.
Lisa Dark/Subversive Absurdist Apu: If a dead fish and a homeless person had a baby, and the baby puked, and a dog ate the puke, this smells like the rear end of that dog!
Skinner: Lord, give me guidance. That's right, the Guidance Department Detention Room. Thank you, Mrs. Lord.
Skinner Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Willie: And I just sharpened those blades.
Willie Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Homer: With seven cups of coffee still in it. Oh, wait, six.
Homer Character Comedy Observational All Jokes — 60 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Narrator: Previously on 24... I mean The Simpsons
Background character: Head Hall Monitor Loves Poneis / Hates Phonies
Database: Enhance! Skinner Stinks Dehance! Dehance!
Background: Principal / Mama's Boy
Milhouse Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Background: ATM User Devoted Father of Two
Skinner: you song-less land whale
Skinner Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Homer: I'll teach you to make a Poupon 'me.'
Lisa: If someone did eat Bart's shorts, they'd have a tummy full of pocket garbage.
Lisa Callback Observational ★ Rewatch Callback Narrator: Or maybe it's a.m. Whichever one is the morning one, it's not that one.
Apu: If a dead fish and a homeless person had a baby, and the baby puked, and a dog ate the puke, this smells like the rear end of that dog!
Jimbo · Dolph: Let's spit in the coffee pots. I call hazelnut.
Groundskeeper Willie: Now this crossword's nothin' but swears.
Milhouse · Lisa: Permission to buy a Hostess fruit pie to keep my strength up? Denied.
Dolph: Hey, lay off. You're the fat one of you guys! I'm bulking up for football!
Dolph Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Kearney: You call that playing to win?
Homer: This is our life now, Milhouse. We're Dumpster folk.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy Lisa: He'll be somewhat missed.
Lisa Deadpan/Understatement Skinner: Lord, give me guidance. That's right, the Guidance Department Detention Room. Thank you, Mrs. Lord.
Skinner Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Marge: Kids love the zing of raisins!
Marge Character Comedy Observational Bart · Skinner: Wow, that's a swear? Used as a noun it is. Sweet!
Jimbo: six weeks of bottled farts
Jimbo · Carol: Put a top on, Mom! Everyone's seen your implants. But the doctor said the air will help them... Just go!
Dolph: Lookin' good, Carol!
Dolph Dark/Subversive Cringe/Discomfort Lisa: The teacher gave him a frowny-face.
Lisa Character Comedy Observational Jimbo: Scram... boiled eggs would be lovely for breakfast, Mother.
Jimbo Character Comedy Misdirection Bart: Damn it, these blue prints are all wrong. Where's the roller coaster room and the shark tank?
Bart Absurdist Character Comedy Bart: Son of a beach ball, they're gone!
Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Bart · Jack Bauer · Chloe: Ahmed Adoody. Does anyone there know Ahmed Adoody? Ahmed Adoody, wealthy Saudi financier. Really? No, Jack, it's a joke name.
Marge: 20 minutes at 300 degrees is the equivalent of five minutes at... 1,200 degrees.
Marge Character Comedy Absurdist Marge: Pink frosting fixes everything.
Marge Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Homer · Milhouse: Say, is your butt numb from all this vibrating? Oh, mine is. Still, I wouldn't describe it as unpleasant.
Milhouse: Oh, sweet mother of Mary!
Milhouse Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Willie: Old Betsy'll get us there.
Martin: This is as boring as mainstream cinema.
Martin Character Comedy Observational Martin: This is as boring as mainstream cinema.
Martin Observational Character Comedy Chief Wiggum: What is it about a woman in a Dumpster?
Dolph: They're gonna wish the bake sale was a nose plug sale.
Jimbo: And it totally isn't.
Jimbo Deadpan/Understatement Absurdist Groundskeeper Willie: I'll mop up your blood from the inside!
Martin · Nelson: Skip, skip, skip to my Lou... Top of the morning, Nelson. And to you, Martin.
Nelson: Can't a guy enjoy a catchy tune?
Nelson Misdirection Character Comedy Bart · Lisa: You're on a Bluetooth cell phone, the most vulnerable device known to man. But it looks so cool.
Bart · Lisa: You're on a Bluetooth cell phone, the most vulnerable device known to man. But it looks so cool.
Unknown parent: Rice Krispie Treats?! Way to phone it in, Sarah Wiggum.
Martin: All here, from Asimov to Zarathustra.
Martin Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Jimbo: Smell you later. Three minutes later, to be exact.
Jimbo Wordplay/Pun Callback Callback Marge: Don't worry, it's not too moist.
Marge Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Homer · Marge: All the other husbands don't come home dirty from fighting. I had to fight. Lenny said his dad is Hulk Hogan, and I know he's not.
Bart: Hey, I'm fine. They haven't made a French horn yet that can hurt me.
Bart Character Comedy Absurdist Lisa: That's a class-five stench-dispersal unit.
Lisa Absurdist Wordplay/Pun Lisa: There's over 30 years of wiener soakings in there.
Lisa Absurdist Observational Willie: And I just sharpened those blades.
Willie Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Lisa: As you're dying, jam the blades with your spine.
Lisa Dark/Subversive Absurdist Homer: With seven cups of coffee still in it. Oh, wait, six.
Homer Character Comedy Observational Bart: Oh, that's convenient.
Bart Meta/Self-Referential Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Willie: I don't want to live if I have to clean up this mess.
Willie Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Marge: Oh, I'm just glad you taste like hot dogs.
Marge Character Comedy Callback Callback Jack Bauer: I pulled every single field agent off all other cases to track you down and bring you to justice.
Jack Bauer: It's okay, that was Shelbyville.
Jack Bauer Dark/Subversive Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Top Episodes — The Simpsons
