Lisa makes a table centerpiece for the Thanksgiving dinner, which Bart accidentally destroys. After he is sent to his room by his parents, Bart angrily runs away from home and experiences a very different kind of Thanksgiving holiday.
Thanksgiving chaos yields 61 jokes in 22 minutes—Simpsons' densest early-season outing.
Directed by David Silverman · Written by John Swartzwelder, George Meyer
WAR
45.1
Wins Above Replacement
“Bart Vs Thanksgiving” ranks #99 of 226 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 80.6 — Elite. The episode packs 61 scored jokes at 4.1 per minute, averaging 6.9 on craft and 6.6 on impact, with Bart landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
Get weekly comedy rankings
Join comedy fans getting new analyses, score drops, and the funniest moments each week. Free, no spam.
Top Jokes
It's your fault America has lost its way. -It's all your fault. -I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
I saw the best meals Of my generation destroyed By the madness of my brother My soul carved in slices By spiky-haired demons
Lisa Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Not today. You saw what happened! Lord, be honest! Are we the most pathetic family in the universe?
Homer Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch And Lord, we're thankful for nuclear power... the cleanest, safest energy source... except for solar, which is a pipe dream.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch I'm sorry, Lisa. -Apology accepted.
Bart Lisa Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 61 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Stop fighting with your sister! -She took my glue! -It's not yours! This is family glue!
So glue friendly, or I'll take your glue away!
Homer Wordplay/Pun Absurdist Hey, man, I don't want your stupid glue.
Bart Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch -Did that make sense? -Not really, Bill. -Now I know how the Pilgrims felt. -What?
-Who the hell is that? -Bullwinkle. -Who's that? -Underdog. Don't you know anything?
They should use cartoons made in the last 50 years. This is a tradition. If you build a balloon for every cartoon character... you'll turn the parade into a farce.
Bart Lisa Irony/Sarcasm Observational ★ Rewatch -Open the can. -Where's the can opener? It's in the second drawer from the right. No, no, the other one.
It's broken, Mom. Mom, it's broken. Mom, it's broken Mom, it's broken
Homer Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Cranberry sauce à la Bart.
Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy They're Daddy's favorite team. He wants them to lose by less than five points.
Lisa Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch They'll feed him dinner through a tube. Hope they can fit a turkey in there.
Some people find your turkey a little dry. Now they'll have an option.
Patty Selma Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch It's good to see you. Gotta pick up my old man! Bye!
Homer Reaction Beat Character Comedy -So insincere. -How does she put up with him?
I love those kids! They got such a great attitude!
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch ...the Western hemisphere! The dancing-est hemisphere!
Before we sit down to our delicious turkey purée...
Oh, I knew they wouldn't forget me.
-This place is depressing. -Hey, I live here! Well, I'm sure it's a blast once you get used to it.
Bart Grampa Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy ★ Rewatch You never do anything right.
A stadium's too big for flash pictures to work, but nobody cares!
That's no way to lay a fire! -This will roar any time now. -A caveman could start it.
Holy moly! That's the biggest one of those I ever saw!
Homer Character Comedy Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch -I always said she was gifted. -Definitely from our side. Right, Mom?
Speaking of heroes, here's mine: Tom Turkey!
Homer Setup/Punchline Character Comedy -Yikes! What is that? -It's the centerpiece. -It's taking up real estate. -Move it, toots!
-Hey, that got her going! -Bitchen!
Patty Selma Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch I'll take some white meat to go, and send up the pie.
Bart Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch I didn't ruin Thanksgiving, she did. I always get blamed.
Bart Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm And Lord, we're thankful for nuclear power... the cleanest, safest energy source... except for solar, which is a pipe dream.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Not today. You saw what happened! Lord, be honest! Are we the most pathetic family in the universe?
Homer Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch -Amen. -Worst prayer yet.
Boy, come here. You're a good dog. We don't need them to get a Thanksgiving dinner.
Bart Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Smithers, every year you outstrip yourself in succulence.
Mr. Burns Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch No, I couldn't eat another bite. Dispose of all this.
Mr. Burns Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch The intruder is a young male, age 9 to 11. Release the hounds.
I saw the best meals Of my generation destroyed By the madness of my brother My soul carved in slices By spiky-haired demons
Lisa Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Twelve bucks! Hey, I can bleed.
Bart Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Here you go, doll face. Okay, Homer. Just relax.
Homer was never stubborn. He always folded instantly. As if he had no will of his own. -Isn't that true, Homer? -Yes, Dad.
Twelve bucks and a free cookie. What a country.
Bart Character Comedy Observational Viva skid row! Hey, it's that anchor dude from Channel 6.
Bart Irony/Sarcasm Observational We have lots of names for these people: Bums, deadbeats, losers, scums of the earth. We'd like to sweep them into the gutter or to some other out-of-the-way place.
So every year on one lone, conscience-salving day... we toss these people a bone. A turkey bone.
Pompous, blow-dried, college boy! -His girlfriend does the weather. -You don't say.
How long have you been on the streets? Five years. Ha-ha! I didn't apologize!
-Ha-ha! I didn't apologize! Give me the number for 911!
Give me the number for 911!
Marge Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Thanks for your help. This reporter smells another Emmy.
Yeah, there's this family I hang out with. -Sounds pretty sweet. -Yeah, I guess it is.
Guys, unless you feel weird about taking money... from a kid, I thought.... -I wouldn't feel weird. -I'm comfortable with it.
Let's go! If I'm not back at the home by 9... they declare me dead and collect my insurance.
Grampa Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Let's go! If I'm not back at the home by 9, they declare me dead and collect my insurance.
Grandpa Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Get down on your knees and beg for forgiveness. Yeah, beg me, Bart. Beg me!
Now we can blame him for everything! -It's your fault I'm bald! -Sorry. -It's your fault I'm old! -Sorry. -It's your fault I can't talk! -Sorry.
It's your fault America has lost its way. -It's all your fault. -I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
Jackpot! A sellout crowd at the Super Bowl... Simpson down by six with two seconds left. He's got Simpson in the open. Touchdown, Simpson! The boy nobody wanted just won the Super Bowl!
Bart Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Jackpot! A sellout crowd at the Super Bowl... Simpson down by six with two seconds left. He's got Simpson in the open. Touchdown, Simpson! The boy nobody wanted just won the Super Bowl!
Bart Character Comedy Visual Gag Because you hate me or because you're bad?
Lisa Character Comedy Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch I don't know. I don't know why I enjoyed it... or why I'll do it again!
Bart Character Comedy Dark/Subversive I'm sorry, Lisa. -Apology accepted.
Bart Lisa Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Top Episodes — The Simpsons
