Bart becomes convinced that his new neighbor, Walt, is his archenemy, Sideshow Bob, disguised and back for revenge. But when Marge tries to convince Bart otherwise by taking him to visit the state penitentiary, a disturbing truth is revealed.
WAR
37.2
Wins Above Replacement
“The Bob Next Door” ranks #357 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 76.5 — Great. The episode packs 49 scored jokes at 2.8 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.5 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Sideshow Bob: Five-second rule.
Marge: Thank you. You're very sweet.
Marge Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: What kind of big, fat moron would fall for... (sniffs) Cookies! So delicious. Must buy house.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Sideshow Bob · Bart: Hello, Bart! Hello, Bart. Hello, BART. (screams) Sideshow Bob!
Sideshow Bob: Luckily, as Krusty's sidekick, I'd been hit with so many pies that my face had lost all sensation. Or so I thought. (screams in pain)
All Jokes — 49 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer: Mmm. (drools) at mention of cooking books and fudging numbers
Homer Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Principal Skinner · Otto: Good morning, children. Today, we are instituting shortened school hours. How shortened? Take 'em home, Otto.
Lou · Chief Wiggum: I don't know, Chief. We can't afford a radar gun, so we're just using a thermos on top of a hose handle.
Chief Wiggum · Lou: Well, it's better than my pistol. Hey, hey, uh, that Ralphie's getting to be a pretty fine artist. I drew it.
Marge: What if someone moves in with two Barts? Or four teenage Barts?
Marge Escalation Character Comedy Homer: Eh, at least they're learning their fractions.
Homer Deadpan/Understatement Observational Homer: What kind of big, fat moron would fall for... (sniffs) Cookies! So delicious. Must buy house.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Marge · Homer: Homer, no! Marge, get loan preapproved. Offer over asking. Waive inspections. Two-day escrow! Initial the radon disclosure. And done.
Real Estate Agent: But my loan has already been sold in pieces to banks, hedge funds and municipalities across the globe.
Unknown · Homer · Marge: Death to Homer! At least we'll always have Beowulf. That's not us.
Homer: A credenza? Credenza?! Lowboy? Sideboard? Portmanteau?
Homer Escalation Character Comedy Lisa: Mom, it's so superficial to judge our new neighbor based on his furniture. (gasps) He drives a hybrid!
Lisa Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Marge · Lisa · Homer: And where there's exotic fish, there's got to be a... Water feature. Dames. (groans)
Bart: No doubt you read about me in your nuisance neighbor disclosure.
Bart Observational Character Comedy Bart: Well, I'm gonna go introduce myself Bart Simpson-style. (hawks and spits)
Bart Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Sideshow Bob · Bart: Hello, Bart! Hello, Bart. Hello, BART. (screams) Sideshow Bob!
Homer: A lot of people sound like Sideshow Bob. Like Frasier on Cheers. Or Frasier on Frasier. Or Lieutenant Commander Tom Dodge in Down Periscope.
Homer Meta/Self-Referential Escalation ★ Rewatch Homer: Ice cream?! Oh, nothing is ever boobs or ice cream.
Homer Character Comedy Misdirection ★ Rewatch Walt/Bob: Sorry, gentlemen. I'm not a fan of that particular style of music. My radio dial never strays from 89.4 'The Spur.'
Walt/Bob Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Bart: Calm, Comfortable, a 'Cuddly Puppies' calendar. Aw, little guy can't get out of the pumpkin.
Bart Character Comedy Visual Gag Bart · Marge: Who needs a knife this big? It's probably a deboner. (chuckles) Boner.
Prison Guard · Prisoners: Pretty lady in a strapless dress coming through! Oh, yeah! Come here, woman! If you were my wife, I never would've killed you!
Marge: Thank you. You're very sweet.
Marge Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Prisoners: Nothing is holding up the dress! Only her melons!
Marge · Prisoners: Guys, guys, I'm married. You are? So sorry.
Sideshow Bob: Hope I didn't interrupt your petite dejeuner.
Walt Warren/Sideshow Bob · Bart: They're playing Spokane. The Cascades? They totally stole the Federal Cup from us last year.
Homer: Marge, the bathroom scale is lying again.
Homer Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Walt · Homer · Marge: (high-pitched voice): I'm not Sideshow Bob. I'm the real Walt Warren. But that's impossible. If you're the real Walt Warren, who's taking our son to the baseball game right now?
Unknown: It's like you're a Chinese empress.
Walt · Sideshow Bob: Say, Bob, why do you keep measuring my face? Just passing the time, bunky. Well, I guess it beats what the last guy did.
Sideshow Bob: Five-second rule.
Sideshow Bob: Luckily, as Krusty's sidekick, I'd been hit with so many pies that my face had lost all sensation. Or so I thought. (screams in pain)
Prison Clerk · Sideshow Bob: $143,000. Oh! It was only $27,000 when you came in, but we invested it well. Would you like a commission? Not allowed.
Sideshow Bob · Bart: Selling the house will be murder. You could just rent it till the market recovers... which'll be never.
Walt · Bart: I tried to warn you by writing 'Bart Simpson will die' on the walls, but you ignored me. You have to admit, 'Bart Simpson Will Die' was kind of open to interpretation.
Walt Bart Deadpan/Understatement Observational Sideshow Bob: My face. My beautiful, borrowed face.
Waitress Joyce: I don't care if you don't have a face. I just need something warm to cuddle at night!
Homer: Walt, it's a nice face, but I don't think it would drive a professional waitress to lie.
Homer Deadpan/Understatement Observational Waitress Joyce: All the good men are either gay or have no face.
Bart: I'll probably kill myself pretty soon with all the stupid things I do. Oh, no! I swallowed my tongue! (gagging)
Bart Irony/Sarcasm Physical/Slapstick Sideshow Bob · Bart: But their sum total is the greatest murder since Snape killed Dumbledore. Oh, I haven't gotten to that part yet. It's a four-year-old book. I'm a slow reader.
Homer: Sí. Uh, yes, I'd like... um... How do you say taco in Mexican? Taco. Yes, that's exactly the word I want to translate. Taco.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist Chief Wiggum · Sideshow Bob: Hold it right there, Switches of Eastface. Switches of Eastface? I don't want to censor myself. That's how creativity dies.
Chief Wiggum: You see, Bob, Bart was never convinced you were Walt. So before he left for the game, he called us and warned us to track you. Which we were able to do through the dashboard of you car, which, like all hybrids, is secretly monitored by the government.
New Jersey Police: We're takin' you in. But first, we're gonna make a stop at the shore for some Skee-Ball and funnel cakes.
Bart: Well, not everything. Apparently someone switched your face with a butt.
Bart Visual Gag Character Comedy Ned Flanders · Cousin Ted · Flanders Family: Howdilly-dowdilly, next-door-oonies. Howdy, Cousin Ted. Howdy do to you, Cousin Ned. How are Roddy and Toddy? Flantastic times two. How are Connie and Bonnie? Dandy as candy, like every good Flandy.
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