Homer ends up in the Springfield penitentiary after getting caught bribing an official; an FBI investigator offers Homer a way to reduce his jail time.
WAR
35.1
Wins Above Replacement
“Donnie Fatso” ranks #342 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 76.8 — Great. The episode packs 54 scored jokes at 3.2 per minute, averaging 6.8 on craft and 6.5 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Fat Tony: In the strip club of my heart, you held the key to the champagne room.
Fat Tony Character Comedy Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch Fat Tony · Homer: You think an informant could get that close to me? Oh, yeah. I got in your gang, and you barely know who I am.
Homer · Chief Wiggum: The government runs out of money, so they pass a bunch of lame-o laws to sock it to the little guy. Fine. You're telling it like it is. Also a crime now.
Homer · Bart: It's okay. It's okay. I can be out in 18 months with good behavior. We're Simpsons, Dad. We don't do good behavior.
Homer: I was, uh, just thinking how cheap this crime would've been in the 70's, when gas was 35 cents a gallon.
Homer Observational Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 54 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer Character Comedy Running Gag Marge · Lisa: I don't even want to smell sparkling apple juice again. Aw. Poor baby.
Homer · Bart: Come on, Bart. Afraid of a little apple juice? Pig in a blanket! Dad's underwear. Aunt Selma's leg.
Lisa: I hate New Year's Eve. I can't believe I made out with Ryan Seacrest on the TV screen.
Lisa Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Lisa · Marge: I didn't see you drink last night. I didn't. I got secondhand wasted from smooching your father.
Marge · Homer: So not a peep out of anyone till the Fiesta Bowl. That's not for five hours. I know when the freaking Fiesta Bowl is!
TV Announcer: New Year's Eve might be over in America, but we're still rocking hard in Samoa. And here come the Blue Angels waking up the shrieking wah-wah birds.
Chief Wiggum · Homer: Simpson, you've committed Springfield's first crime of the new year. Failed to separate your bottles and newspapers.
Homer: 50 bucks?! That used to cover two public nudities and a poop in the park.
Homer Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Chief Wiggum · Homer: That's vandalizing city property. What the hell?! Mild obscenity before 10:00 a.m. Also illegal.
Homer · Chief Wiggum: The government runs out of money, so they pass a bunch of lame-o laws to sock it to the little guy. Fine. You're telling it like it is. Also a crime now.
Homer · Chief Wiggum: That's almost $1,000! Rounding up your total-- that's a $50 fine.
Lisa: This year's only 11 hours old, and it's already your annus horribilis. My New Year's resolution was to learn Latin.
Lisa Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Moe · Theater performers: Glinda, Madame Morrible, flying monkeys there, can you tell me how I can get back to my bar? Moe, you've always had the power to get back to the bar.
Homer: Whoa! It's a chimpan-me.
Homer Wordplay/Pun Absurdist Moe: You slip the guy 100 bucks, and your record is as clean as... Uh, I ain't got nothing, uh, clean to compare it to.
Moe Setup/Punchline Character Comedy Homer: Ten minutes? I can't wait that long. I left an ice cream cone in my cup holder. Hold on. I will get help. Must break glass.
Homer · Chief Wiggum: Chief, this is just a big misunderstanding. I meant to write 'bride.' It's a wedding present. Oh, how thoughtful. Aah! My bribe!
Homer · Bart: It's okay. It's okay. I can be out in 18 months with good behavior. We're Simpsons, Dad. We don't do good behavior.
Homer · Judge: All that time I'll be stuck in my cell, unable to exercise. Actually, most convicts work out like crazy. I repeat: unable to exercise.
Homer Judge Setup/Punchline Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: I can't go undercover with Fat Tony. He's met me. I've been in his house. I was briefly his 'conserigliary...' consugly... canoliar... Robert Duvall.
Homer Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Homer · FBI Agent: Can I be Johnny Undercover? That's a little obvious. Okay. Melvin Mafia.
FBI Agent · Homer: You will be known as Nicky 'Blue Pants' Altosaxophony. Can I keep the name after I'm done? No. It belongs to the government.
FBI Agent · Homer: To zoom in, you go, 'Ayyy!' To zoom out, go, 'Ohhh!' Ayyy. Ohhh! Ayyy. Ohhh! Fuhgetaboutit! That activates the auto-destruct.
Marge: Dear Lord, watch over my sweet Homie while he's in the hoosegow. Keep him safe from shanks and shivs. Let him become rich in the jail yard currencies of cigarettes and dried fish.
Marge Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Prisoner · Homer: You do know the meat is made from diseased pigeons. Just get the ladle down there deep. That's where the beaks are.
Homer Absurdist Character Comedy Callback FBI Agent · Homer: Don't worry. We're not going to touch you. We'll make it sound like a beating by tenderizing these steaks. Can I have any of the steaks? No.
Homer: That's so mean! Please! Let me have it! Come on! Give it to me right in the mouth!
Homer Cringe/Discomfort Misdirection FBI Agent 1 · FBI Agent 2: He's in. Aw, for-- I was going to say that!
Krusty: If, if Jews control the media, why can't I get on Jimmy Kimmel, huh? Huh?
Krusty Dark/Subversive Irony/Sarcasm Homer · Fat Tony · Louie: I detect a distinct lack of oregano. You carry oregano with you? Oregano, basil, rosemary... I-I think I got a ketchup packet for you, boss.
Louie: I-I-I bring my own candy to the movie theater.
Louie Escalation Cringe/Discomfort Fat Tony: My beloved Anna Maria. I hope Heaven's powder room is painted that eggshell blue you could never achieve on Earth.
Fat Tony Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Fat Tony · Homer: You think an informant could get that close to me? Oh, yeah. I got in your gang, and you barely know who I am.
Fat Tony · Homer: When I call for my Russian business partner, Yuri Nator, I don't expect to be screamed at like I was some ten-year-old punk making a prank call. Yuri Nator? Yuri Nator! Hey, my mouth is begging for a Yuri Nator!
Yuri Nator: Why, you... I'm going to chop you into little pieces, and make you into a Rubik's cube, which I will never solve!
Homer: I was, uh, just thinking how cheap this crime would've been in the 70's, when gas was 35 cents a gallon.
Homer Observational Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Homer: This is horrible! I keep smelling my own breath!
Homer Visual Gag Cringe/Discomfort Fat Tony: Nicolas Blue Pants, you have shown great fazagabool in the face of overwhelming spoogatzagatini.
Fat Tony · Homer · Gang: From now on, you don't know where you end and we begin. Your problems are our problems. My neck is kind of itchy. Then all of our necks are itchy.
Fat Tony · Homer: To heterosexual male friendship, the kind the Greeks wrote about. Huh?
Fat Tony: You're as nervous as a cat when Johnny Kick-A-Cat walks into the room.
Fat Tony Setup/Punchline Absurdist ★ Rewatch Fat Tony: In the strip club of my heart, you held the key to the champagne room.
Fat Tony Character Comedy Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch FBI Agent: Homer, I just want to say that of all the rat bastards we've had working for us, you were the snitchiest.
Homer: He was just a soldier in a war he started.
Homer Irony/Sarcasm Observational ★ Rewatch Homer · Marge: When I shut my eyes, all I see is Fat Tony and me having drinks at that bar on the beach. You never took me to that bar on the beach. Oh. Well, uh... you wouldn't like it; it's not very good.
Fit Tony · Homer: No. I'm his cousin from San Diego-- Fit Tony. Wow, I've never seen a mobster use a track suit for exercising.
Fit Tony: Your tears seem in no way crocodilian.
Homer · Mr. Burns: Well. This is awkward. What? Oh, uh, Mr. Burns! Uh, you were cool, too.
Fit Tony: And to extinguish you would be to whack what still remains of him.
Fit Tony · Homer: That's why I keep my friends close. And your enemies closer? No, why would I do that? If they were close, they would kill me.
Narrator Homer: The pressures got to him, so he started to eat. Soon, he was known as 'Fit Fat Tony,' then just 'Fat Tony' for short.
Narrator Homer: Now I'm just an average schnook like everyone else, stuck in this backwater burg where all you can count on is your family, and the only one who ever shot anyone is the baby.
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