A recent transfer student named Diggs rescues Bart from a confrontation with bullies.
WAR
46.4
Wins Above Replacement
“Diggs” ranks #276 of 552 The Simpsons episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 78.5 — Elite. The episode packs 76 scored jokes at 4.4 per minute, averaging 7.0 on craft and 6.2 on impact, with Homer landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Milhouse: I'm already the boy who shared a comb with a boy who threw up on the boy who wet his pants at the winter carnival.
Milhouse Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Homer: Sorry, son, I only have 20s. And if God needs money, why doesn't he just write another Bible? The first one sold pretty well.
Homer Observational Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Dr. Hibbert: Son, by rights, I should be playing banjo at your funeral.
Homer: You hug the bedpost. Then I hug the bedpost. That way we never hug each other.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Diggs: Habemus Papam! We have a poop! It's white. You're in.
Diggs Wordplay/Pun Absurdist ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 76 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Homer Character Comedy Callback Reverend Lovejoy: Kingdom of Moab is the least interesting in the Bible. Amen. Amen! We're done!
Homer Character Comedy Reaction Beat Reverend Lovejoy: ill-advised mission in Indonesia
Reverend Kartawijaya: One boy, named Sumadi, never comes to church. He is always tying the monkeys' tails together and yelling, 'Tiger is gone,' when, in fact, tiger is there.
Reverend Kartawijaya: After all, we are all just children of Allah. I mean God. Sorry. Recent convert.
Homer: Poor Sumadi. Born in such a terrible country.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Homer: Wasn't our sympathetic nodding enough?
Homer Observational Character Comedy Marge: I spent all I had lighting that candle for Great Aunt Betty.
Marge Visual Gag Irony/Sarcasm Bart: I hope that wasn't somebody's Aunt Betty or something.
Bart Reaction Beat Meta/Self-Referential Homer: Sorry, son, I only have 20s. And if God needs money, why doesn't he just write another Bible? The first one sold pretty well.
Homer Observational Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Ned · Homer: Does anyone remember when it was considered rude to talk in church? Pipe down, Ned.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Homer · Bart: Do you have my money? What? Do you have my money? How could I? Right, right, too soon.
Homer: Seriously, do you have my money? Where's my money? Where's... my... mon... ey?
Homer Escalation Running Gag Callback Bart: Did you know there really was a Duncan Hines?
Bart Observational Misdirection Homer: Pressure's how you make your beloved diamonds, Marge.
Homer Character Comedy Observational Marge: I don't have any diamonds.
Marge Deadpan/Understatement Diggs: I will eat anything for money! Except money!
Diggs Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Kids · Bart: And here's something that'll make you forget about the other stuff. Ay caramba.
Bully: 20 big ones says you're not messed-up enough to eat... this.
Bully Setup/Punchline Cringe/Discomfort Bully: Do it, and you'll always be known as the kid who ate the dead frog.
Dr. Hibbert: Son, by rights, I should be playing banjo at your funeral.
Homer: Did you owe me some money?
Homer Callback Character Comedy Callback Kids: Ew! It's the kid who ate the dead frog!
Kids Callback Cringe/Discomfort Callback Bart: Herbivore! That's someone who eats plants. I named the frog Herb.
Bart Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Milhouse: I'm already the boy who shared a comb with a boy who threw up on the boy who wet his pants at the winter carnival.
Milhouse Escalation Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bully: What's the matter, frog in your throat?
Bully Wordplay/Pun Callback Callback Dolph: All we hear is: ribbit, ribbit!
Dolph Escalation Physical/Slapstick Diggs: Oh, so you're the reason I had to dissect a Muppet in biology today.
Diggs Absurdist Callback ★ Rewatch Callback Bart: Even after Springfield Montessori opened across the street?
Bart Observational Irony/Sarcasm Diggs: That place is really in your face.
Diggs: I'm president, secretary treasurer and faculty advisor. That took a lot of fancy paperwork.
Diggs Absurdist Character Comedy Diggs: Habemus Papam! We have a poop! It's white. You're in.
Diggs Wordplay/Pun Absurdist ★ Rewatch Milhouse: Can the Esperanto Society be far behind? I mean... Cu la Esperanto-Societo esti multe malantau?
Milhouse Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Martin: Two languages, and somehow no one will talk to you. Gi estas vera. Mi tre soleca.
Martin Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy Marge · Homer: Oh, is it all right to say 'tarde'? Mmm, hey, you've said it twice, Marge-- you're in pretty deep.
Bart · Homer: Wow, you don't know how impressive that is to a boy whose dad can't even get the dog to sit. Sit. Sit. Sit... Sit! I don't know what that is, but it's not sitting!
Homer: There comes a time when a boy sneaks his first beer. Finally! I was beginning to think that kid was a... teetotaler.
Homer Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Bart: I wasn't drinking. I was learning that nature isn't a complete waste of space.
Bart Character Comedy Observational Homer: It's even better than I thought. You've found your Moe Szyslak!
Homer Character Comedy Callback Homer: In just a few short years, you'll be getting your version of baked on your version of pot listening to your version of Journey.
Homer Character Comedy Observational Diggs: Just goofing on you. This is the finger he bit off.
Diggs Dark/Subversive Misdirection Diggs: Yes, Bart, that is how you conjugate the verb 'to do.' Well done.
Diggs Observational Character Comedy Groundskeeper Willie: Give that back! All I got is a hole in my face!
Diggs: Nobody could communicate that. Except maybe Gerard Manley Hopkins.
Diggs Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bart Deadpan/Understatement Bart · Diggs: Say something so I'll know you're not hurt. I'm really hurt. Phew!
Diggs: Well, my dad said don't bring home any more dogs, cats, turtles or snakes, but he never said anything about predatory birds.
Diggs Character Comedy Observational Abe Simpson: You Korean girls know what a soldier likes.
Diggs: No, I signed them myself. They're people I would've liked to come visit.
Diggs Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Diggs: You're like Diogenes. But with slingshot in place of lamp.
Diggs Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Bart: This hospital has another doctor?
Bart: He's just riding the thermals from Dad's butt.
Bart Character Comedy Physical/Slapstick Lisa: At least someone in this family is using them.
Lisa Deadpan/Understatement Marge: This is one of those Arkham Asylum-type hospitals.
Marge Observational Dark/Subversive Homer: I have about eight of them.
Homer Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Homer: You hug the bedpost. Then I hug the bedpost. That way we never hug each other.
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Bullies: Yeah, and a rubber perch! Yeah, yeah, and a... I get it. It sucks. Really sucks. Rubber birdfeeder.
Bart · Bullies: Making fun of the mentally ill-- real classy. But you guys were... We were what, Captain Sensitive?
Diggs: The rumors of my bonkertude have been greatly exaggerated.
Diggs Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Diggs: DSM-5 indicates paranoid schizophrenia, but that work is mired in controversy. Mired.
Diggs Character Comedy Observational ★ Rewatch Diggs: I'm fine. My meds won't wear off till tonight. Then I'll have Freedom tear you to shreds.
Diggs Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Diggs: You're discounting all talk radio.
Diggs Observational Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Comic Book Guy: Why am I not surprised the only sport you do is one where a bird brings you food?
Comic Book Guy · Falcon: Um, a falcon's greatest joy is to serve its master. Fatso!
Comic Book Guy · Falcon: Once again, I must point out that you are not a parrot. Fatso, fatso! Pees in the shower!
Bart · Diggs: Um... with our minds? No. With this rope. I'm a messed-up kid. I'm not Magneto.
Homer: If you see the stork what brings us babies, kill it!
Homer Character Comedy Absurdist ★ Rewatch Moe: If you see the stork what brings us babies, kill it!
Moe Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Bart: Well, I guess some delicate birds are safer in a cage.
Bart Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Diggs: I had thought of it as a therapeutic milieu, but now 'cage' is stuck in my head, so thanks.
Diggs Observational Character Comedy Diggs: She came in on a Saturday. Missed her kid's karate demonstration. He was going up a belt.
Diggs Observational Character Comedy Bart · Marge: Mom, you didn't cook the falcon? Of course not. It's just duck.
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