Jack and C.C. try to make their long distance romance work, Liz decides to invest in real estate, and Kenneth becomes addicted to caffeine.
Escalation-driven character comedy hits 81, sustaining 2.77 jokes per minute across Season 2's sharpest half-hour.
Directed by Richard Shepard · Written by Donald Glover, Robert Carlock
WAR
106.9
Wins Above Replacement
“Episode 210” ranks #116 of 138 30 Rock episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 93.8 — Elite. The episode packs 78 scored jokes at 3.8 per minute, averaging 7.4 on craft and 7.3 on impact, with Liz Lemon landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Jack Donaghy: I'll just tell Don Geiss that I let a subordinate with an unaccredited theater tech degree do a billion-dollar handshake deal while my girlfriend and I showered together at a Red Roof Inn.
Tracy Jordan · Kenneth: So you had a little bender. It's not just the coffee. I also went to a PG-13 movie. I bought a pair of sunglasses. I tried a Jewish doughnut.
Liz Lemon: 'Cause an apartment never waits till you get in the shower then steals the necklace your mother gave you.
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Liz Lemon: I spent my junior year abroad in Frankfurt. I partied so hard over there, it was cr-azy. So many different types of sparrows!
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Misdirection ★ Rewatch CC: When I was with you the other day, I missed the vote on a bill to legalize recreational whale torture.
CC Absurdist Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 78 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ Jack Donaghy: We're trying to buy the largest cable network in Northern Europe. And if we do do that, it'll be huge.
Detlef: What about you, huge doodoo?
Detlef Setup/Punchline Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Jack Donaghy: Detlef, that is hilarious. Bavarians are so stingy!
Jack Donaghy: There is an 8 o'clock showing of 'Fred Claus'.
Liz Lemon: I have a checking account, I am two payments away from owning my bike, also I have a star that my aunt named after me, although that was recently downgraded to a gas giant, so--
Jack Donaghy: Now she's my favorite singer. Love.
Jack Donaghy: Lemon, wanting someone to actually be part of your life -- I've never had that before.
Jack Donaghy · Liz Lemon: Buy real estate. That's the best investment there is. Real estate? No, that's something you do when you're married and have a family. Sure. Wait for that, and your first home will be in the floating city of New Chicago.
Tracy Jordan · Kenneth: This cappuccino machine is my way of saying sorry for what happened the other day. Tracy, your father is here. My father? Okay, that may have been a dream. Anyway, enjoy.
Unknown: Look at those whores!
Jenna Maroney · Liz Lemon: Are you looking at porn? I know a good site that's dirty without sacrificing story. It's by women for women.
Jenna Maroney: I own my place here. My condo in Clearwater. And I bought some land in the ninth ward after Katrina. I'm leasing it back to the government as a prison. Ka-ching!
Liz Lemon · Jenna Maroney: Even Frank owns that chicken ranch in Nevada. He thought he was buying a whorehouse.
Jenna Maroney: Oh, you're gonna love it. Oh, if you're interested, AJ's also selling a speedboat and a truck full of cigarettes.
Liz Lemon · Unknown: The machine is mankind's madness and disfigurement. Industry castrates art. The only honesty is in suicide. I can't watch any more of these German sitcoms! Try a game show.
Jack Donaghy: Look, the president is only going to veto your crazy social programs. The founding fathers never intended for the poor to live into their 40s.
Jack Donaghy Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch Unknown German: Are you ready to play? Interrogation bear!
Liz Lemon: I spent my junior year abroad in Frankfurt. I partied so hard over there, it was cr-azy. So many different types of sparrows!
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Misdirection ★ Rewatch Jack Donaghy: I honestly don't know how Kelly Ripa does it.
Liz Lemon · Jack Donaghy: - I have a thing that night. - I have a thing that night.
Kenneth: I don't drink hot liquids of any kind. That's the devil's temperature.
Tracy Jordan: Ken, this is New York, the big easy. Live a little!
Tracy Jordan: Boundaries are made to be tested. That's why my wife and I stopped using a 'safe word.'
Tracy Jordan: Regrets are for horseshoes and handbags.
Kenneth: 'Oh, my!' — Kenneth's reaction to trying coffee for the first time
Kenneth Reaction Beat Character Comedy Liz Lemon: 'Cause an apartment never waits till you get in the shower then steals the necklace your mother gave you.
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Setup/Punchline Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Announcer: The Windmere: If you lived here, you'd be home now!
Kenneth: I love how it makes me feel. It's like my heart is trying to hug my brain.
Kenneth Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Callback Tracy Jordan: You know what we've never done, Grizz? Fight each other!
Jack Donaghy: You said you wanted me to meet you halfway, and this betting parlor in the Pennsylvania coal mining country is exactly half the distance between my office and yours.
Jack Donaghy: All my life, work came first. I missed so many weddings, funerals, karate demonstrations. Birthdays, Lilith Fairs.
Jack Donaghy: You're my new night job. And I'm gonna love you like my boss is watching.
Jack Donaghy · Local: Say, what do you think they do for fun around here? Smack around nosy out-of-towners. Also, we have a lovely doll museum.
Kenneth: If you're not reading the bible in German, you're not getting the real versteckte Bedeutung of it.
Liz Lemon · Kenneth: Your last name is weird. Are you okay? Who wants coffee?
Jack Donaghy: Let's move here. We'll get a little cabin in the woods. I'll plant heirloom tomatoes. We'll ride our bikes into town. I'll grow a beard. People from my old life will pass through town. They won't even recognize me. They'll just say, 'thanks, pap,' and then they'll buy some of my cider.
Jack Donaghy: I'm in looooove! God, I wish this town weren't halfway between DC and New York.
Liz Lemon: And I don't know why I lied to you guys about having read that book. I'm just nervous. Anyway, I didn't read 'The Lovely Bones'.
Liz Lemon: This is empty. So... we have so much in common. We're all white.
Liz Lemon Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Liz Lemon · Co-op Board Member: Funny story. I was on a plane once with Brett Favre's cousin-- It says here... that you still have an outstanding student loan?
Liz Lemon: Yes. It is outstanding.
Liz Lemon Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback Liz Lemon: The theater program at my school lost its accreditation, so I thought I didn't have to pay for it anymore.
Liz Lemon: I am a great neighbor. Just ask anyone in my building. Except Raheem. I turned him in to homeland security. By accident.
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Liz Lemon · Co-op Board Member: I love your building. There. I said it. Love. There's, uh... something coming out of your nose.
Jack Donaghy: Did you know they replace the Pips every five years, just like Menudo?
Liz Lemon: The Germans! I am going through something right now! They're a day early.
Jonathan: Then Jack will be CEO, and I will be king of the assistants!
Liz Lemon: Gentlemen, Mr. Donaghy is not in the positions to worry himself this occurrence. But your bussiness makings are much importance to his heart.
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch Callback Jack Donaghy: What happened? I just bought a German television studio. That's what I call a country breakfast. Although I've never been to a place before where they kill the pig in front of you. It's so quaint. It's strange we didn't get any ham.
Jack Donaghy: Love... a urine mirage in a desert of fear.
Jack Donaghy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Tracy Jordan: You rode the brown serpent.
Kenneth: One, if I found any MacKenzies living up here, I would kill them.
Kenneth Character Comedy Dark/Subversive Absurdist ★ Rewatch Tracy Jordan · Kenneth: So you had a little bender. It's not just the coffee. I also went to a PG-13 movie. I bought a pair of sunglasses. I tried a Jewish doughnut.
Kenneth: I'd always been told that New York was the 21st century city of Sodom. And look what's happened. I've become one of them. I've been sodomized.
Kenneth Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Liz Lemon: This is the number you gave me. I hope it's not fake. 'Cause you accepted my bid, and I haven't heard from you.
Liz Lemon: But I'm doing great. I bought a German television studio today.
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm Misdirection Callback Liz Lemon: Does everyone know that you're a bunch of liars, or should I tell them myself? Because I know a lot of people.
Liz Lemon: I am going to the hospital, and I hope you're happy!
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Escalation Cringe/Discomfort Liz Lemon: I'm just... confused. It seems weird to me that you would still be advertising the apartment after you accepted my offer. And I am here to remind you--
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Running Gag Callback Liz Lemon: And you know what? I've moved on. I bought a whole bunch of apartments. I bought a black apartment. So...
Liz Lemon Character Comedy Absurdist Running Gag ★ Rewatch Callback Jack Donaghy · Liz Lemon: Lemon, how do you say 'buy' and 'sell' in German? Verkaufen and kaufen. So close. Other way around. Oh, yeah. I always got confused by that.
Liz Lemon · Jack Donaghy: SALE OF NBC TO GERMAN FIRM RUMORED. Blurgh! Yes. Blurgh.
Jack Donaghy: I'll just tell Don Geiss that I let a subordinate with an unaccredited theater tech degree do a billion-dollar handshake deal while my girlfriend and I showered together at a Red Roof Inn.
Roadside Sign: Hockassin is for lovers
Jack Donaghy · Liz Lemon: All this time I've been telling you that we can have it all -- success and happiness. The big office and true love. Wait--we can't? No. Because they both require everything of you. You have to choose.
CC: When I was with you the other day, I missed the vote on a bill to legalize recreational whale torture.
CC Absurdist Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch CC: We only have one speed, Jack. That's what I love about us. The drive, the ambition. Our belief that sex is a competition.
CC Character Comedy Setup/Punchline CC: You know, I think it goes back to my mother's mother. She was in a loveless marriage for 40 years...
CC Cringe/Discomfort Deadpan/Understatement Jack Donaghy · CC: Did you take another call while I was talking? Yes, but never forgetting that you were on the other line.
Kenneth: It's been an honor being your friend and learning about the non-reproductive aspects of human sexuality from you.
Kenneth Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Tracy Jordan: Who's gonna help me tell white people apart? And what about our tickets to Spamalot? And who'll be my wingman at speed dating?
Kenneth: Oh, Grizz, I'll miss you most of all.
Kenneth Character Comedy Misdirection Co-op Board Member · Liz Lemon: Liz, this is Charlotte. She's, uh... buying the apartment. Congratulations. If you blow out the kitchen wall, you can make a very nice breakfast nook.
Gladys Knight: and you shouldn't torture whales.
Jack Donaghy · Liz Lemon: Wanna get drunk? No. There's too many phones in here.
Jack Donaghy: You should have gone for it, you know? You made the same choice that CC and I did. You chose your career over Floyd.
Gladys Knight · Kenneth: there's an 11:45 and I was misinformed about the time / misinformed about the time / didn't even get to stand in line
Gladys Knight · Jack Donaghy: Hello. I'm trying to take a nap. What's going on out here? Nothing, Gladys Knight. Sorry. Sorry, everyone.
