Meet The Woggels!

Liz:The TGS sweatshirts were supposed to say 'TGS Season Six, Yuck,' which is a catch-phrase from a pretty great sketch. Yuck! But they got misprinted and now they say, 'TGS Season Six, Duck!' And that's a season five catchphrase. Duck!?

Jack:A real problem is losing your giant scissors right before a ribbon-cutting for a couch factory. I just...had them.

Jack:Oh, thank God. I thought I'd lost them.

Jack:factories provide three things this country desperately needs: Jobs, pride, and material for Bruce Springsteen songs.

Kenneth:Oh, I listened to rock and roll music once, but I stopped before I started worshipping the devil. The song went, 'Mr. Sandma--', then I shut it off.

Liz:Back in Chicago, I walked in on you with the guy from blues traveler. He still had his harmonica thing on.

Jenna:Like Yoko Ono and the Beatles, or Lance Drake Mandrell and Wilson Phillips.

Liz · Jenna:They sold out Madison square garden in nine minutes, for a Tuesday morning show. Wait, who plays on a Tuesday morning?

Jenna:I don't know, just a little band called the Woggels. ♪ apples are red ♪ ♪ bananas are yellow ♪ ♪ I love my friends, bananas are yellow ♪

Kenneth:My eight-year-old niece walked down the aisle to that song at her wedding.

Jenna:Well, it ticks off a lot of boxes on my sexual walkabout list. 'Yoko a band, make love to a beloved children's entertainer, be with a non-aboriginal Australian--'

Jenna:Maybe Raffi. Or the sedated prisoner they put inside of Barney.

Tracy:Something terrible has happened! And for once I'm not talking about the collapse of the middle class.

Liz:I didn't even get in, and I was first in my class. Although, only seven of us graduated that year because of a bad mono outbreak which somehow missed me, despite all the frenching I did.

Tracy:We go to the school of hard knocks, a one-year vocational program where you learn to bang on doors and scare people into subscribing to magazines that they'll never get.

Tracy · Dotcom:Really, Dotcom? How did your city council campaign go? Well, as far as raising the level of discourse in this city? I'd say it was a great success.

Dr. Singh:Born April 24, 1925, at Boston catholic guilt hospital.

Dr. Singh:We found your name on a list of disappointments she keeps folded up in her shoe.

Colleen:Dr. Singh, are you stealing my hats? What do you do, feed them to your cow God?

Colleen:Ooh, sofa. Somebody got all flouncy when I wasn't looking. What are you gonna do, put on your galoshes and go eat some fruit, like a Frenchman?

Colleen:What are you gonna do, put on your galoshes and go eat some fruit, like a Frenchman?

Colleen:Yes, I know it's over, Kouchie. Unlike you, I have eyes.

Ian:Nothing can tear us apart... Except for the shark that got a hold of the fifth woggel.

Jack:My good friend dick Cheney got one. A month later, he and I went hunting in Mexico. He shot thousands of doves that day and only hit me in the leg once.

Jack:Like the flashlight in my race war preparedness bag.

Jack:She's referring to my birth.

Colleen:This is supposed to be a hospital, not a Japanese internment camp I volunteered at during the war.

Jack:You could look out at the park and watch carriage horses being whipped. I know how you love that.

Colleen:What if I run into Eloise? Am I supposed not to mention the fact that she has a gay grandson? Everybody knows!

Jack:Because at Ellis island, your mother's name was recorded as 'unclaimed Irish stowaway.'

Tracy · George Foreman · Grizz:Son, we have a lot of work to do today if I'm gonna 'reverse Urkel' you. Dad, I just want to read. Jordan men don't read. Grizz, tear this book in half.

Grizz:Tray, montage got married and quit stripping.

Jack:Next thing you know, they'll be giving her his retractable wings and rocket arms.

Jack:Lemon, my mother did explain sex to me, three years ago. There were...drawings.

Liz:You talk in your sleep. I know what you did in the war, and before you die, I want you to know that I know.

Jack:like Bill Belichick listening to Adele.

Jack:As my coffee cup said this morning, 'you only regret the things you didn't do. This cup was made from recycled toilet paper.'

Jenna:And this is coming from someone Quincy Jones once pushed off a boat.

Jenna:It doesn't matter what this brain thinks. It matters what this brain thinks.

Jack:Dean Cain is always there hoping to get recognized.

Colleen:Can we do something about the temperature in here? I'd like it humid and cold. Duck!

Russ:In Australia, 'woggel' means 'white.'

Jenna:No, you don't know what you're talking about. Paul isn't gonna-- I mean, Russ. Paul is American for Russ.

Colleen:God on a wheel! Jackie and I know how we feel. We don't have to say it out loud like a couple of gays getting married in jean shorts in Provincetown while I'm just trying to enjoy an ice cream on the pier!

Liz · Colleen:'Say it out, speak it clear. You should listen, dude. Also, hear. It's too late, when--' You have two minutes to find that battery before I die.

Grizz:Tony will rush it for me. We do zumba together.

Tracy:Like teaching him how to ride a bike... Down the Luxor pyramid. Or drive a car... Vel franchise into the ground. I never even taught him how to shave... An orangutan.

Tracy:Hey, Angie. What's up? You had the baby? Okay. Name him George foreman. And also, we're out of soda at home. Lamont, hurry up and deliver that baby before they realize we're not doctors.

Dotcom:All My Children... was cancelled.

Russ:♪ separate the races, mommy kangaroo ♪

Colleen:Sew up your cabbage hole, girl.

Colleen:If you were my kid, I'd mail you back to the stork.

Jack:When I was eight, she took me to the post office because I spilled juice on a couch reserved for the pope, which has still never been used. He'll come.

Jack:which you should know was actually wine.

Liz:Not a part of this, I get it. But I made this happen! I made this happen.

Tracy:because my tongue caught what my foot has.

Jenna:Oh, God. He's dressed like her. I'm too late. I've been replaced.

Jack:Oh, you'd know. You lived through it.

Woggels:♪ Feelings feelings feelings say how you feel ♪ ♪ Apples ♪ ♪ You taste good ♪ ♪ Trees ♪ ♪ You give us wood ♪ ♪ Grandma ♪ ♪ I am gay ♪ ♪ Bridge ♪ ♪ You turn me on in a sexual way ♪