Character Analysis
Joan Callamezzo
Played by Mo Collins
41 jokes across 13 episodes of Parks and Recreation
8.9
41
6.8
6.5
Character Comedy
Joan delivers 41 scored jokes across 13 episodes of Parks and Recreation, averaging 6.8 on craft and 6.5 on impact for a career WAR of 8.9. Their comedy leans toward character comedy. The highest-scoring line is below.
Funniest Joan Lines
Joan:Joan? I stole my gym teacher's husband.
Joan:When I was 18, Val Kilmer saw me at a mall and told me I should model. That never happened.
Joan:Well, that's your opinion.
Tom · Joan:If we're both still single in an hour, let's get married. Tom, I'm already married. That's right. To Seal. What? I confused you with Heidi Klum again.
Joan:I'm like a caged peacock yearning for the wind on her haunches.
All Jokes — 33 total
Tom · Joan:How are your kids doing? They're pretty good. Is it tough for them to have a mother that is so beautiful?
Joan:you were flashing some serious 'do me' eyes. That's just my opinion.
Joan:This exclusive story, there is no mole on Miss Knope!
Joan:Like I'm on a Stairmaster, except more, like, in a sexual... Context.
Joan · Cameraman:And I am not a crook. No, he's not.
Joan:Tonight, we're hoping the people of Pawnee dig their big, chubby hands into their plus-size pockets and donate generously.
Joan · Leslie:You just love flashing your ass, don't you? When it's for a good cause, Joan.
Joan:Harvest Festival more like 'Harvest Bestival.' They've planted the seeds, and now, they're harvesting the rewards. They'll put the fun in funnel cake.
Tom · Joan:If we're both still single in an hour, let's get married. Tom, I'm already married. That's right. To Seal. What? I confused you with Heidi Klum again.
Joan:Joan? I stole my gym teacher's husband.
Joan · Ben:Hi. Joan Callamezzo. Yeah. Hi, Ben Wyatt. We've met. I don't think so. Yeah, I was on your show. Nope.
Joan:I'm trying to find the words to describe this girl Without being disrespectful
Joan:Ben, I'm cute together with everybody.
Joan · Leslie:We received a tip that you, Leslie 'Born and Raised' Knope, were not born in Pawnee. What? Gotcha!
Leslie · Joan:I have to tell you. This feels like 'Gotcha' journalism. In what way? That way. You put 'Gotcha' on my face.
Joan:Where was Leslie Knope actually born? Pawnee. We will pull out the world map and speculate wildly.
Joan:When I was 18, Val Kilmer saw me at a mall and told me I should model. That never happened.
Joan:I'm like a caged peacock yearning for the wind on her haunches.
Joan:I'll have another drink, and so will this adorable hunk of caramel to my right.
Joan:Take me home, dumpling. It's beddy time.
Joan:I want to take you both home and...bend you over and just...at the same time.
Joan · Tom:Well, thank you for getting me home last night. I wasn't feeling very well. Because of some bad seafood that I ate. Yes. That's probably what it was.
Joan:Well, that's your opinion.
Joan:Yeah, listen, I'm a little under the weather. I went on a booze cruise last week. It just finished up an hour ago.
Joan:On a completely unrelated note, I have horrible allergies.
Joan:Today's show will not go on.
Joan · Annabel · Ron:Finally. / But my fave new item is a deliciously bold chair... / Did that woman call my chair 'delicious'?
Joan · Annabel:And I think this is really important, so I need everyone to shut up... I love your hair. / Oh. Thank you. / It's genetic and unattainable.
Joan · Unknown:What do you think about Juan Callamezzo? Isn't 'Juan' a man's name? No, it means 'flower.' I think it means 'John.'
Joan:I'll have the 'Joan.' It's a tumbler of gin and it's got crushed aspirin around the rim.
Joan:I'll have the 'Joan.' It's a tumbler of gin and it's got crushed aspirin around the rim.
Joan · April:You said your name was Glenn? Yes, I did.
Joan:On a separate note, I think that America should have a purge night.