Alexs Romance

You don't see me crying, do you? What do you see me doing, huh? Driving a cab!

The last lady you introduced me to kept talking about how all the world's problems could be solved if everybody practiced nude skydiving.

You realize that, in some primitive cultures, that would mean we're married?

Bob leaving abruptly after setting up the introduction

So, uh... tell me, you cry here often?

That's one good thing about being a cab driver: You never have to worry about getting fired from a good job.

Hey, hey, hey. Congratulations.

Hey, listen, if I ever have a happy home, you have a standing invitation to come and destroy it anytime you like.

I'm not going to let this get me down! At least not until I've had dinner with that swashbuckling ne'er-do-well Alex Rieger.

Do you often lose control like that?

You see those framed documents on the wall? Well, those are subpoenas from the Board of Health.

Where's your summer home? I open the windows.

The vase is from the Ming Dynasty. The Ming dynasty? Yeah. The Ming Dynasty. That's a little shop down on 17th street.

You're a man!

Dear, I have company. Don't come out for a while. She stays in there all the time.

We didn't shake on it. Right, and I had my fingers crossed all the time.

Lips touching lips! Yuck! What a terrible thought.

Every time you say something funny I want to kiss you. Oh... I wish you didn't tell me that. I'm going to be very self-conscious now because, every time I make a joke, you're going to think I'm just doing it to try to get a... A priest and a rabbi walked into a bar...

Do you mind if we just jump to the punch line?

I bumped into a chair and told the chair I was sorry.

No, you're in trouble when it goes to the door and scratches to go out.

No, Tony. He's just thrilled about being a cab driver. Oh, I get that way myself sometimes.

It's like being on a roller coaster and hoping the ride never ends, if you know what I mean.

Louie's entire anti-coffee break speech using George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Eisenhower

You red pinkie!

Don't let this go to your head, but you could have your way with me.

You're right. I didn't want to meet him.

I'm going to ask her to marry me. Great idea. What a pro. Perfect. Aw... It's never going to work.

Proposing? My heavens, no. I'm running for governor, and this is my way of asking you for your vote.

You've got candles and flowers and a bell. A bell? No, don't! Just forget that bell.

I'm tired of you. No, I withdraw the proposal.

you better be quick, because you're not the only girl I'm proposing to tonight.

I have the audacity to believe that I'm good for you.

I told you, not the bell!

They came to pick up my violins. Thanks. Thanks, fellas. Do they have to go back to the shop? Oh, that's terrible. I guess they need a couple of tubes, that's all.

We're fighting because we care too much, and we're breaking up because we don't care enough.

Will you marry me? No! Just checking!

Life is like... an ice cream cone. You got to eat it when you get it. That's right. Got to eat it fast. Because, if you don't, it's going to melt all over your hand and down your arm. That's no good. Do you want to go through life licking your arm?

You should listen to him. He knows what he talking about. Thank you very much. I knew I could help him. Yes, that was very nice what you did for him, Jim. Very nice. Well... Bobby's had it pretty rough. Trying to make it as a boxer, and raise the two kids...